Love chemicals

Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ]

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,747
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

17 Aug 2019, 5:05 pm

I thought this was an interesting article about the chemical reactions we have when we fall in love.

https://www.bustle.com/p/7-signs-youre-chemically-bonded-to-your-significant-other-according-to-science-9312852

martianprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 22 Jun 2019
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,048
Location: Kansas

18 Aug 2019, 1:44 pm

"You really like kissing your partner" and "cuddling is your favorite thing about sex" have never been true for me. Maybe it's one of those things where you need 5/7 or something. Haha.

It kind of worried me reading this because some of these things are a couple of the reasons people stay in unhealthy relationships. Thanks, brain, for producing such powerful hormones to make us lovedrugged zombies.

_________________
The phone ping from a pillow fort in a corn maze
I don't have a horse in your war games
I don't even really like horses
I like wild orchids and neighbors with wide orbits

hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,747
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

18 Aug 2019, 1:55 pm

martianprincess wrote:

It kind of worried me reading this because some of these things are a couple of the reasons people stay in unhealthy relationships. Thanks, brain for producing such powerful hormones to make is lovedrugged zombies.

I think that people focus on the good moments, rather than the bad. Sometimes too much on the measly scraps of good.

I read a quote the other day:

Quote:

Does their love leave you feeling good most of the time, or just really good infrequently?

That gave me the kick up the butt to move on with my feelings... Well, I'm trying. Damn dopamine.

martianprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 22 Jun 2019
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,048
Location: Kansas

18 Aug 2019, 3:11 pm

hurtloam wrote:

martianprincess wrote:

I think that people focus on the good moments, rather than the bad. Sometimes too much on the measly scraps of good.

I read a quote the other day:

Quote:

Does their love leave you feeling good most of the time, or just really good infrequently?

That gave me the kick up the butt to move on with my feelings... Well, I'm trying. Damn dopamine.

It's like, I've got these great chemicals being produced that are giving me these good feelings! ... What do I do with it?

I still don't entirely know.

Social mores have never been my strong suit. As most of us here can identify with.

_________________
The phone ping from a pillow fort in a corn maze
I don't have a horse in your war games
I don't even really like horses
I like wild orchids and neighbors with wide orbits

hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,747
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

18 Aug 2019, 4:35 pm

I relate.

I say I'm moving on, but I'm stuck with feelings.

Feelings are such a nuisance.

martianprincess
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 22 Jun 2019
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,048
Location: Kansas

18 Aug 2019, 4:57 pm

hurtloam wrote:

I relate.

I say I'm moving on, but I'm stuck with feelings.

Feelings are such a nuisance.

They really are.

I'm sorry you're still going through that. It took me so long to get over a couple of people in the past.

_________________
The phone ping from a pillow fort in a corn maze
I don't have a horse in your war games
I don't even really like horses
I like wild orchids and neighbors with wide orbits

rdos
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

19 Aug 2019, 2:46 am

hurtloam wrote:

A lot of this doesn't apply to me (or to many other NDs). For one, infatuation doesn't increase my sex drive, rather the opposite.

1 is pretty correct. Infatuation does create a lot of pleasurable feelings.

2 is not correct. I don't feel I make any irrational decisions and my mood will not be unsteady.

3 doesn't seem relevant since I don't desire sex with somebody I have an infatuation to.

4 seems to be a later development. I can feel all sorts of things when I have a mind-to-mind connection, but that comes after the infatuation is gone.

5 it's pretty important that a couple will not both go into a bad mood, and that one will be poking the other to avoid that.

6 I don't like kissing, and especially not the french variant.

7 I think I can have an infatuation for twice as long (three years)

So, part of the information in the link really is only relevant for NTs.

rdos
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

19 Aug 2019, 2:55 am

martianprincess wrote:

I think the bad things of infatuation are mostly based on culture or doing things wrong (when it is NDs). So, nothing wrong with this powerful system. We just need to use it in a more sane way that is closer to what evolution had in mind when constructing it in the first place. And the evolutionary function differs considerably between NTs and NDs so much of what works for NTs (like dating) doesn't work well for NDs.

nick007
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,730
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA

19 Aug 2019, 5:11 am

rdos wrote:

6 I don't like kissing, and especially not the french variant.

7 I think I can have an infatuation for twice as long (three years)

I'm not really into kissing either & like the french kind even less.

I think I'll feel the infatuation until the relationship ends.

The rest of the article is true for me thou.

_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill

"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition

Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ]

Jump to:

Love chemicals Post Reply New Topic

Love chemicals