Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

Do you think it's wrong to like a younger guy

Page 1 of 4 [ 59 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,554

22 Oct 2019, 2:04 pm

So recently started working somewhere New and my coworker who is 23 (5 years younger than me) seems to really like me. He laughs and smiles a lot, said multiple times that he enjoy my company a lot, we get on really well and he said maybe we should start our own business in the future. I really like him too but i have no idea if it's romantically or not. I also don't understand flirting since i've never had a relationship and the age gap stresses me a lot also he is my coworker. Tbh i also don't understand why men should always be older in a relationship, my parents also have a 6 year gap but my dad is older.
I have no idea how to approach this situation now and i'm obsessing over it :(



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,817
Location: Stendec

22 Oct 2019, 2:06 pm

No idea? How about asking him, "Hi! Wanna go out for coffee?" or something like that.


_________________
 
I have no love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.


AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,554

22 Oct 2019, 2:09 pm

^We actually hung out a couple of times and ended up talking for two hours. I'm also stressing about this, what if it's inappropriate?
But what i meant to ask was why is it okay when the man is older but not okay when the woman is?



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,817
Location: Stendec

22 Oct 2019, 2:17 pm

AprilR wrote:
^We actually hung out a couple of times and ended up talking for two hours. I'm also stressing about this, what if it's inappropriate?
What if WHAT is inappropriate? Love is where you find it!
AprilR wrote:
But what i meant to ask was why is it okay when the man is older but not okay when the woman is?
Says who? Out of ten couples I personally count as friends, seven of the women are older than their husbands -- from 2 to 7 years older.

What other people think about a mutually supportive and loving relationship between two consenting adults is simply none of their business.

Now get out there and live!

:wink:


_________________
 
I have no love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.


AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,554

22 Oct 2019, 2:21 pm

^ Thank you, it seems illogical to me too. Plus i look a lot younger than my age. And he seems like a independent person too. He came to a different city on his own and found a job on his own. I don't find him immature at all.



magz
Forum Moderator
Forum Moderator

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jun 2017
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 16,283
Location: Poland

22 Oct 2019, 2:22 pm

It's not inappropriate. You are both adults.


_________________
Let's not confuse being normal with being mentally healthy.

<not moderating PPR stuff concerning East Europe>


sly279
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Dec 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 16,181
Location: US

22 Oct 2019, 2:37 pm

AprilR wrote:
^We actually hung out a couple of times and ended up talking for two hours. I'm also stressing about this, what if it's inappropriate?
But what i meant to ask was why is it okay when the man is older but not okay when the woman is?

It’s not seen as ok for either to be older. But if you like each other just go for it. Happiness is rare for us.


_________________
There is no place for me in the world. I'm going into the wilderness, probably to die


sly279
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Dec 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 16,181
Location: US

22 Oct 2019, 2:39 pm

Some actor just proposed to woman half his age. She’s 26 he’s 66


_________________
There is no place for me in the world. I'm going into the wilderness, probably to die


Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,817
Location: Stendec

22 Oct 2019, 2:40 pm

Live, Love, Laugh, and be free!


_________________
 
I have no love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.


Tetreg
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jul 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 49

22 Oct 2019, 2:46 pm

It's not inappropriate, you're both adults who can make their own decisions, if you wan't to see if you'd like a romantic relationship with this man you should go for it



magz
Forum Moderator
Forum Moderator

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jun 2017
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 16,283
Location: Poland

22 Oct 2019, 2:48 pm

sly279 wrote:
AprilR wrote:
^We actually hung out a couple of times and ended up talking for two hours. I'm also stressing about this, what if it's inappropriate?
But what i meant to ask was why is it okay when the man is older but not okay when the woman is?

It’s not seen as ok for either to be older. But if you like each other just go for it. Happiness is rare for us.

Even by 5 years? They're in the same cohort!


_________________
Let's not confuse being normal with being mentally healthy.

<not moderating PPR stuff concerning East Europe>


AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,554

22 Oct 2019, 3:13 pm

Thank you guys, i was feeling so guilty because of this. I don't think i'm ready for a relationship yet alone with this guy but i don't understand what's so wrong with it even if i do. My mom and friends were very surprised and said it wouldn't work out at all. I can't risk being shunned from my family and friends because of this so i don't think i'll accept even if he asks me out. However i really like him and don't want to hurt him either.



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,817
Location: Stendec

22 Oct 2019, 3:17 pm

AprilR wrote:
I really like him and don't want to hurt him either.
This is all that matters.


_________________
 
I have no love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.


Dog1
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2019
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 137

22 Oct 2019, 3:21 pm

AprilR wrote:
So recently started working somewhere New and my coworker who is 23 (5 years younger than me) seems to really like me. He laughs and smiles a lot, said multiple times that he enjoy my company a lot, we get on really well and he said maybe we should start our own business in the future. I really like him too but i have no idea if it's romantically or not. I also don't understand flirting since i've never had a relationship and the age gap stresses me a lot also he is my coworker. Tbh i also don't understand why men should always be older in a relationship, my parents also have a 6 year gap but my dad is older.
I have no idea how to approach this situation now and i'm obsessing over it :(


Padme Amidala was 10 years older than Anakin Skywalker, so being older isn't an issue.

You could ask him out - and just because you are going on dates, doesn't mean you're going steady in a relationship, unless that's what you both want.

Relax and enjoy your life. :D



AprilR
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Apr 2016
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,554

22 Oct 2019, 3:23 pm

I mean i could understand if everyone said it would be inappropate becsude of the age gap but like i said, my parents also have a 6 years gap and nobody mentions it? So i don't understand why it is different when the woman is older.



AnneOleson
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 May 2016
Age: 68
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,824
Location: Coventry

22 Oct 2019, 3:30 pm

My mother was five years older than my father.