Expecting and always getting rejection

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A few years ago, at my retail job, my co-workers were telling me that a girl I had feelings for had broken up with her boyfriend and she was interested in me.

I thought and assumed they were lying to me and were pulling a prank on me as they all knew I was autistic and desperate for a relationship. I even told them, "What kind of girl would go out with someone as ugly and pathetic as me. She is here, I said," I raised my hand as high as possible, having my hand near the ceiling, "and I am here," having my hand near the floor. "I have more of a chance of winning the lottery than having her accept me."

he was tall and skinny, taller than me, while I even so I assumed she would reject me without a doubt, but many of my coworkers were telling me how she wanted to date me because of how kind and smart I was and they pressured me into asking her out. I had waited a week or so to ask her out as at the time I didn't want to deal with rejection as it led to emotional instabilities.

I asked her out not on a date, but just for coffee, and I was expecting a 100% rejection. I asked her, "Would you like to go for some coffee in the future, just as friends?" I asked her very timidly and completely expecting a no as an answer.

She told me no, and when I asked her, I expected her to tell me I am a creep/weirdo and that if I don't leave her alone she would call the cops on me (Isn't catastrophizing great! ) What she actually told me was she was saying no to me because of my negativity, she told me I need to stop talking so poorly about myself. Apparently she really did want to date me and I screwed as she got word about what I said in the office to my co-workers who tried to encourage me to ask her out.

In the end it ended up being both by being so negative to my co-workers and asking in a too anxious/cautious way was why she rejected me, which I felt with her knowing I had autism I would be anxious/socially awkward.

In your opinion why did she reject me? I suspected and expected as I did then and still do now that my coworkers we just leading me on and trying to make a fool out of me. They told me she rejected me "Because I took too long." Which I find full of B.S.

Now you know that a girl finds you attractive, and she is newly single. You should have time to make her change her mind about the negativity thing. I can't really guarantee that it WILL work, but this is something you can put an effort into making better.

Go get her.

She told you the reason: You were too negative.

It can be very draining to try and have any sort of relationship (platonic or romantic) with someone who is constantly being negative. The person has to spend all of their time trying to build you up, when in all likelihood you either won't believe them or you'll revert back to the negative belief within a few days. It makes for a very one sided and unhealthy relationship.

Maybe you shouldn't be so suspicious that people are lying to you. She actually told you why she rejected you, and apparently you don't believe her because you are here asking WP.

Your negativity. Feel bad about yourself and expect her to feel bad towards you and she will most likely reject you just because of this negativity towards her and about yourself. Negative people cause others to feel bad as well.

The first thought, which came to mind, was that you were a victim of gaslighting.
That is still my best bet, but it is impossible for me to know since I have never met the woman.
I haven't read the rest of the posts, in this thread, so I might be better informed later.

Is there a reliable person, who knows her, whom you could ask about her personality and whether or not she was capable of doing something like that to another person?

At this point in time, we can't really *know*.
We are merely speculating.

I still haven't finished reading the rest of the posts, so yeah.

Once again, we can't assume she didn't gaslight him.
We just don't know.

Erm.
"No means no."

Be careful, the "heavies" might come out of the woodworks and chastise you.