The worst rejection you got from a woman?

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Jayo
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11 Feb 2022, 6:47 pm

Aspie guys: what's your story of the worst rejection you ever got from a woman?
Like, laughing at you when you ask to go on a date, telling you that you must be deluded, or...?
I can only recall once at the age of 21, where a girl I was on a date with just directly told me at the end "we're very different people, I'm looking for someone more spontaneous". This was still in the 90s a few years before my dx.
So it kinda took me by surprise, especially since being spontaneous in the past kinda got me into trouble!! 8O

Another time, in a club in my early 20s, I was making out with this good-looking blonde, and near the end when I said let's walk home together, she told me that she wouldn't go home with me b/c I'm not her type (huh???) :?

I found that during my earlier adult years, I had a certain fear of rejection but I still chatted up females, asked them to dance, got their phone numbers etc... I viscerally knew that there was just something "off" about me compared to others, and that I'd expect rejection w/o knowing the "real" reason - I think that one of my bigger fears was that she'd introduce me to her friends, maybe her ex or a male friend or relative, and they'd be able to "sniff out" my difference in demeanour... like I had to win the acceptance of her circle, not just her, which is where I had a big-time disadvantage compared to an allistic male. Yet I persevered regardless and the crushing verbal rejection never happened :D and it helped that I was able to cover up the bulk of my Aspie manifestations via trial and error.
...so hopefully that's an inspiration for some of you out there.



r00tb33r
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12 Feb 2022, 3:46 am

Quote:
The worst rejection you got from a woman?

"I have to go."



HighLlama
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12 Feb 2022, 4:29 am

She insulted my walk, so I dumped her.

Mostly, though, I notice I do better with women the more I mask. But this is exhausting and not really me, even if I'm not pretending to be someone else.



Jayo
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12 Feb 2022, 11:05 am

HighLlama wrote:
She insulted my walk, so I dumped her.



Well holy geeze YEAH... the hell with her... I mean, even some NT folk could have had a TBI / severe concussion, or even a stroke well before the typical risk demographic... did she act like it was "no big deal anyway", or did she protest your decision?



HighLlama
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12 Feb 2022, 2:43 pm

Jayo wrote:
HighLlama wrote:
She insulted my walk, so I dumped her.



Well holy geeze YEAH... the hell with her... I mean, even some NT folk could have had a TBI / severe concussion, or even a stroke well before the typical risk demographic... did she act like it was "no big deal anyway", or did she protest your decision?


I think in the end it wasn't a big deal. Her apology was more like a way of getting me to act like she was the victim. The problem was how bad she felt for saying it, not how bad she acted.



AnonymousAnonymous
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12 Feb 2022, 2:46 pm

"You're too weird, so not my type!"


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txfz1
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12 Feb 2022, 3:43 pm

No.



AnonymousAnonymous
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12 Feb 2022, 4:03 pm

"I don't like paranoid guys who feel as if they are entitled to a relationship."


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HighLlama
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12 Feb 2022, 4:09 pm

AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
"I don't like paranoid guys who feel as if they are entitled to a relationship."


Yikes. Any idea what prompted that? (Not saying it's your fault.)



AnonymousAnonymous
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12 Feb 2022, 4:11 pm

HighLlama wrote:
AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
"I don't like paranoid guys who feel as if they are entitled to a relationship."


Yikes. Any idea what prompted that? (Not saying it's your fault.)


I don't recall, but I have never felt entitled to having a relationship.


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Jayo
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13 Feb 2022, 1:57 pm

AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
HighLlama wrote:
AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
"I don't like paranoid guys who feel as if they are entitled to a relationship."


Yikes. Any idea what prompted that? (Not saying it's your fault.)


I don't recall, but I have never felt entitled to having a relationship.


Yeah, that comment makes no sense at all. What's with the "paranoid" part -wouldn't a paranoid person prefer NOT to have any relationship, b/c they'd always be worried about their partner backstabbing them in some way???
Maybe she meant to say "insecure" instead of paranoid.



AnonymousAnonymous
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13 Feb 2022, 4:55 pm

Jayo wrote:
AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
HighLlama wrote:
AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
"I don't like paranoid guys who feel as if they are entitled to a relationship."


Yikes. Any idea what prompted that? (Not saying it's your fault.)


I don't recall, but I have never felt entitled to having a relationship.


Yeah, that comment makes no sense at all. What's with the "paranoid" part -wouldn't a paranoid person prefer NOT to have any relationship, b/c they'd always be worried about their partner backstabbing them in some way???
Maybe she meant to say "insecure" instead of paranoid.


Perhaps.

As for another one, a female in a class that
I was in said to me, "Obese men just like you need to understand the opposites regarding love."


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theprisoner
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13 Feb 2022, 5:33 pm

"No way"

" You're just too handsome..."

"No ...!"

"It's like a canon, could never fit that in me..."

"I'm not interested in that..."

"We dont have to take our clothes off to have fun!"

"Lets be friends..."

"Sometimes I Think you're just too good for me"


*Some of these may or may not be factual.* :lol:


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SabbraCadabra
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14 Feb 2022, 12:20 am

I actually dug out the IM log:

me: So I looked at your journal, and there are seven ways to win your heart, and I fulfill all seven =D
her: oh yeah? haha
me: Yes I do.
[minutes later after some unrelated chatter]
me: So do I win your heart now or what?
her: uhmm nope, sorry
her: its not as easy as it sounds.
me: Dang.
me: What else do I need to do?
her: get a job.
her: dress different, wear nice shoes, lLISTENT O GOOD MUSIC
her: heh
me: I have nice shoes!
me: You said Chucks were nice shoes.
her: they are. but they dont cut it
me: I think you're just making excuses.
her: im not.im not. and im just not attracted to you in any way
me: =P
me: Suuure.

I played it off like I was just messing with her, but OUCH >_<


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r00tb33r
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14 Feb 2022, 12:27 am

^ I hope that's a 20 year old chat log. I've got some of those in my hard drive backups. Would be a painfully dull conversation at age 38...



Muse933277
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14 Feb 2022, 12:32 am

Thankfully nothing too harsh, but these are some of the roughest "rejections" that I have had.


There were a few girls in my college club that I tried having a conversation with and they simply just walked away from me mid conversation without saying anything. That happened to me a couple times.

A couple girls, I texted them asking them out and they simply didn't respond back. One girl just flat out blocked me although I will admit with that one, I kind of deserved it.

Sometimes I would talk to girls and they would give me a look of disgust, as if they were offended by me striking up a conversation with them. A lot of women put up a "b***h shield" to guys they don't know that well which is something I have learned the hard way haha.