Surely it must be just as difficult right?

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My parents really try to encourage me to get a job but yet really try and discourage me from seeking a romantic relationship.

I don't get it though? Surely getting/holding down a job if your autistic is just as difficult as maintaining a romantic relationship if your on the spectrum right?

My relatives often ask me if I am employed yet when it comes to romantic relationships they never raise the subject.

Priorities, kid; priorities.

They know that women would rather date men who have demonstrated stability and dedication through employment, rather than some unemployed lager-lout who can only demonstrate how annoying he can be.

I would not let them keep you from dating if you dont live at home?Do you live with them?But how will you pay for dates without a job.Most women wont date guys who are unemployed and broke.You are right that both can be hard because I have never been able to keep a job for longer than a month that pays at least minimum wage and I have not been able to stay in a relationship.Have you considered being a business owner if you can never get a job?Because thats what I did.I bet your parents would get off your back if you told them you were starting a company.However you may have to start at least 10 companies before you start one that can make you a living and you would have to go years without paying yourself anything if you could not find a job.And also it would help you to find a good woman if you stayed out of bars.

Well having a job would probably help so you have some income with which to even spend on things like dates. Also, with how often it seems you hang around bars it may do you some good to be employed to give you something else to do.

How do you even afford to hang around the pub so often if you don't even have a job? anyways.

my parents have a lot of money

It's kind of them to fund your "social life".

Why don't the approve of you dating?

They shouldn't be involved in your social life. It sounds weird they'll pay for you to drink but not date. Another thing that's not adding up. You don't need a job to date, but it's not the best.

Sounds very similar to my parents.I guess a lot of women I know would be fine with dating someone like you since you have rich parents and dont need a job presumably.But just dont blow it all on booze and dates please.A lot of women where I live in Texas would even date you if you went to bars a lot but I dont know how women in the British Isles are.But quality people typically dont go to the bar every night.Its also a good way to get hurt or worse.

I'd guess that James's parents are tired of paying for him & are worried that if he got a girlfriend they would end up paying for James's dating expenses as well.

In my experience, I can maintain a job & a romantic relationship a lot better than I can obtain them. It's extremely difficult for me to get hired for a job & also just as difficult for me to get a girlfriend. When I was allowed to work overtime, I would work over 9 hours 6 days every week not counting an hour long lunch break. I also love spending a lot of time with my romantic partner. Most companies will not give me an interview thou & I never managed to get a single date. A relationship is much more important for me than a job but I am disabled & do have some benefits. I've been together with my current girlfriend for 10 years & we've been living together for 9. I've only had 3 jobs thou & the one I had the longest only lasted for 25 months. I quit that job after I got in trouble for something that was not my fault. My department had a contract crew helping us out because my department was rapidly getting more & more shorthanded. A couple months after I quit the contract crew took over fully & the few who were left were dissolved into other departments. I woulda had problems working in other departments so I feel I was kinda forced out.

No.

Jobs are easier.

It's just a simple matter of commerce. Trading your time & productivity, skills, and/or knowledge for money.

Relationships are much more difficult to obtain and maintain. They require attraction, emotions/feelings, communication skills, and a whole bunch of give/take work. etc. Much more complicated than a simple transaction like a job is.

You do have a point goldfish but different Aspies can have very different strengths & weaknesses sometimes. There are some Aspies who can handle having a romantic relationship a lot better than they can handle holding down a job. My girlfriend would be one of them. She has lots of Aspie symptoms if she is not on the spectrum & like me she also has other various issues. While a job can be much more straightforward, she has good days & bad days & she could have a very bad day any time. Most jobs would require employees to have a somewhat consistent schedule & performance requirements that need to be regularly met. Most jobs are not able to be very accommodating for someone who is very inconsistent & somewhat unpredictable. However when it comes to romantic relationships, some guys expect a woman to be inconsistent & unpredictable. I've seen various posts on WP by members who have managed to have a long term relationship but can not handle having a job or can not keep a job. A majority of those members seem to be women thou so gender differences may come into play here. That said, there is probably more women who can handle & keep a job easier than they can keep a romantic relationship. But when someone on WP or who is disabled in genereral is able to keep a relationship but not a job, it does seem to be much more common with woman, thou there can be plenty of exceptions of corse. The percentage of working married men is likely higher than the percentage of working married women. Of corse that does NOT mean that those women are not capable of working. It could just mean that they do not need to go to work, but it could highlight that the expectation for a romantic partner to have a job is more important for women in relationships than the other way around.

I would like to bring something up.

Society expects males to earn their worth. Females do not have to earn their worth because they have a womb, are pretty, or take care of children.

Males are expected to sacrifice themselves for the collective.

Mothers want their sons to be obedient and don't necessarily seek self actualization for them.

Males are dispensible. If there is one male per hundred females a population can grow faster than a 50 50 split. Societies that did not make males dispensible got overran by ones that did.

People want you to get a job because everyone is supposed to get one. They want the comfort of shared misery.

Everyone is not supposed to have a romantic love life. That is competitive endeavor. Society doesn't care about the individual. Society wants to teach you to risk your life, and earn for women and children. People will gladly beat you over the head about not being a 1%er.

I don't believe everything I read. Somethings are not true. But, there is a kernel of truth to some stuff. You don't have to get upset about it. I think it helps not to be fooled.

Here is one more thing. If you go around and don't necessarily follow the social rules, people will try to shame you. They will hope you don't ever get a girlfriend. They hope whatever girlfriend you find is ugly as sin.

I don't think you should believe what I wrote literally. Figuratively, it could be a good idea. Figuratively, I think it is true.