I’m Ready To Look For Love

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I’m ready to look for guys, but I’m going get scared when I have to tell someone that I have Cerebral Pasly, Aspergers, Psoriasis, Dyslexia & Learning Disability. I know now to wait to tell a guy. Am I wasting my time?

Nah, it's cool. Nothing may come out of your time, but if you don't bother, nothing surely will. There'll be people out there that are completely fine with those things. There's compassionate and understanding people in the world, and there's many that have similar things so there's understanding that way too.

I'd just be wary of guys that prey on people who're vulnerable if I were you. I'd be cautious. Bad guys will pick it up even without them knowing your labels. I'm vulnerable in social and emotional things, so I know how this goes (I'm astute in other matters, but that's not really useful).

You don't need to tell them about half of those problems. I never told a single woman I have Dyslexia.

Have you considered meeting Aspie guys at a local support group? You might not need to hide stuff, in that case.

Of course, you aren't going to like every Aspie guy you meet, but hopefully you'll like some of them. I would strongly suggest that you at least consider your local autistic adult community as one possible place to find a partner who will truly appreciate you.

But please do be careful to protect your privacy in the initial phases of getting to know someone, whether in the autistic community or elsewhere. See, for example, my warnings about online harassment.

Your problems will become evident to anyone with whom you have a longterm intimate relationship, even if you don't put labels on them.

Personally I think it's best to build relationships on a foundation of honesty, although there's such a thing as revealing too much too soon.

I rather think that we as Aspies (and other 'disabilities' or 'impairments') need special people to see beyond those things. And while it takes longer to find that diamond... when you do, you will know it's real... Just my $0.02. I personally have more or less given up, but then I seem to be 180 degrees from anything.

On another note, being single isn't the end of the world. Nor is being alone. Some of the wisest words ever spoken -- "I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone." And as those dealing with ASD and Asperger's, I think we've all been there.