Is this a realistic option?

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I keep seeing ads pop up online for sites like asianmoonshine.com and asian-love-magazine.com. These sites seem highly suspicious to me, but the idea of dating and marrying someone from across the world seems to be growing in popularity. I've heard about the show 90-Day Fiancé. I personally like the idea, and foreign women do seem more appealing than many of the single women here.

But I have reservations about how safe it is to look for foreign women online. I've heard of scam where women get American men to send them money b pretending to be interested in coming to the US. And I've heard of some foreign women who marry American men just to use them to get here and file for divorce as soon as their naturalization is finalized. But I have also heard of many people this has worked out well for. I certainly do not think all foreign women are just looking to take advantage of American men, but my problem is knowing how to tell which are sincere and which aren't.

Additionally, I do not have any money, and I do not know how I will pay to bring someone here from abroad.

And I don't know if I can tell if I like someone until I meet her in person. I don't want to invest a lot of time and money in a long distance relationship, only for one of us to not like the other once we meet IRL.

Probably not realistic now----but maybe when you get more money from the teaching job you should get with your degree.

There is a high potential for scams.

And a high potential for women to get their Green Cards, then split on you.

Iv'e gone the international dating route for nearly a year now, specifically with filipina/indonesian women so I can tell you a bit about my experience.


The best online dating websites to meet filipina women is FilipinoCupid for about $30 per month, although I would recommend only signing up for 1 month just to see what it's like. When you sign up and start messaging women, you will notice that you will receive wayyyyyy more messages from women than you would receive in your home country. For instance, if you're an average looking guy and sent out messages to 100 different girls on Tinder in whatever city you live in, you may only get 5-7 to respond back. In The Philippines, at least 80 of them will respond back to you. No exaggeration. You will have literally 100+ options to choose from, simply because you're a white man. The trick is to message as many women as possible initially for the best chance of finding a good match.


Just keep in mind, many of these women will gradually fizzle out. If 100 women respond back to you, you may only get the social media contact with 10 of them, and getting their social media contact information so you two can continue chatting is very important. Most women on FilipinoCupid don't stay on the site for too long; they're on there for a month at most until they find a guy they like, or simply give up and leave, so getting social media contact after 5 days of talking is going to be important otherwise you might lose her. I'd recommend creating a Facebook account specifically for the intention of meeting women online. Be sure to add at least 6-7 pictures of yourself, including pictures you DIDNT use on your online dating profile, so she doesn't think you're a complete fake. Most women will be happy to give you their contact information so you two can chat.


Once you get their social media contact, you can continue chatting with them, but try to respond within 5-10 minutes to keep yourself engaged with them. Eventually, video chatting is VERY important and my recommendation is to video chat with them within a week or two of getting their social media contact information. The reason this is important is because you want to find out whether or not they're a real person and also to check if you two vibe or not. Most women will be more than happy to video chat with you once.

Keep in mind, some of these women you chat with on social media will also gradually fizzle out within the first week of you two talking to each other. This is why it's important to be talking to multiple women because the odds are, at least one of them will like you enough to stick around. If you're talking to 10 girls on Facebook, maybe 2-3 of them will turn into long term texting buddies. And once you get to know someone for a couple months and you like them as more than a friend, express interest in them and see how they respond.



Here are some traits that filipina women tend to have in common based on my experience:


1. Most of them live with their parents and don't drive. If you ever meet a filipina woman that drives, she is probably fairly financially well off.

2. They tend to have big families and are very family-oriented.

3. In terms of beliefs and values, the majority of filipinas are christian and want to have children someday. If religious women or women who want children are a deal-breaker to you, then don't date a filipina.

4. Not every filipina, but many of them are waiting until marriage to have sex. If this is a deal-breaker to you, then this is something you should be asking them before committing to anybody.

5. The internet there is not the best; many of the women you talk to will have poor internet connection so keep that in mind.

6. Within the first day or two of talking, you should be upfront that you will not send any money to anybody under any circumstances. Any woman who is a scammer will not waste her time with you, although most women you talk to will not be scammers.

^^ It's all about the looks at the end of the day, the same white man who is seen as 3/10 in the looks department among his community may be seen as 9/10 in the asian community. What you experience in a filipina dating site is the same what a super handsome man experiences on tinder in his own community.

Yes, all my ex asian gfs initiated interest to me because of my looks, they do say they like me for other traits too, but even them admit that it's the looks that created the first spark.

Most of those sites probably have no actual women on them, just bots.

You'll definitely get attention from women, especially if you go the Philippines route.

I lost track of how many women I talked to on Facebook, although at least half of them would fizzle out within a week of talking either because I didn't feel a spark, they didn't feel a spark, or it was mutual.

Still, I talked to quite a few on a long term basis, which I consider to be a month or longer. Several of them, it was pretty clear they were interested in me but for one reason or another, I didn't "make a move". But the fact that I had women interested in me, something that didn't happen often in the west, tells you a lot about the dating scene as a white man in The Philippines. And these arne't ugly overweight women either; some of these women are fairly decently attractive too.

Keep in mind though, this is just my experience. Your experience may be different than mine and I'm sure it will vary depending on your age, looks, and personality. You may signup for an international dating site and find the love of your life within the first year, or you may get lucky and find someone within a month. Or it could be a while before you find someone. It really depends on how much time you're willing to invest in using the site, how picky you are, and your age, looks, and personality, and luck.

Problem: Facebook has a "real names" policy, which they intermittently and unpredictably enforce by occasionally, suddenly requiring people to upload a scan of their photo ID.

Of course, as you get to know a prospective partner, you're going to have to share your legal name sooner or later, but I personally think it wise to put this off for as long as possible, until you have a very good feel for how trustworthy and how emotionally stable the other person is.

Here's a page of Online Dating and Dating App Safety Tips. This article appears to be aimed primarily at women, but much of the advice is applicable to men too.

Filipina women (at least the ones who sign up for these online dating sites) tend to be marriage minded and the majority want to have kids as well. If you're the type of guy that doesn't want to get married and doesn't want to have kids, then I wouldn't recommend going this route because you're going to have incompatible views with the majority.

Also, some of the women I talked to, at least claimed they preferred to wait until marriage to have sex. If this is a deal-breaker for you, then you will be incompatible with many of the women you meet. The more religious she is, the more likely she holds these views.

Also, you probably need a decent amount of cash, just to even visit The Philippines, although the good news is that things tend to be very cheap there once you do arrive.

It's a bunch of rancid hot garbage.

It's sexist, racist, and very likely illegal. I know that too many men, especially those of the incel variety, believe that Asian women are all submissive and will allow their men to be abusive to them. It's frightening to think this actually exists in the 21st century. Not surprising, but frightening

I used to see those repulisive ads all the time when playing games like Criminal Case on Facebook until I got adblock. Apparently the sexist racist idiots advertising them think that all game players are pathetic male losers hiding in their mom's basement while female game players who live in their own apartment don't exist.

So how old is too old? What can I realistically expect being in my early 40s?



Problem is, I need to know someone well before I'll be ready to consider marriage.

I'm an atheist. I don't want to dismiss anyone entirely for being a Christian, but it comes down to how serious she is about it; if she is the type that is constantly obsessed with Jesus and the Bible and church (like many are here in the Bible Belt) then I just don't see things working out. No sex before marriage would normally be a deal breaker, but someone relocating from another country is already a huge commitment. Maybe the Filipinas aren't the best choice. What about women from other Asian or South American countries?

I'd rather go live and work in Asia or South America and meet women there. That way it would be more natural and wouldn't carry the pressure of requiring a huge up-front commitment. But I do not have the means to do that.

I do not trust that these kinds of sites or legit anyway. If some are, how can I tell which ones?

What are you accusing me of?

I agree 100%.

I'd also like to add that often, after bringing a foreign bride to the USA, she may slowly start to acclimate and realize that the "good-looking" white man that she thought was a 9/10 is actually just a 3/10 in his homeland and she can find better.

The one white man in the Philippines mogged the Filipino men; but now in his country, she can see there are better looking white men to chose from.

Oh, so you are one of those:

viewtopic.php?t=403700

Actually they saw me as 8-9/10 despite them living here, in a white country (not sure if Arabs are considered Whites, but Asians do consider us Whites too).

Well, this is interesting.

Anyway. As much as the L&D section seems to be a place of perpetual moaning for some, a lot of that complaining is because some see the years tick by while others far younger seem to be considerably further along on the relationship bandwagon.

I don't even like half the of the moaning that goes on here. As far as I'm concerned people should have their occasional vent on here and be done with it. That said, considering the OP's situation as much as I want to keep out of it, I doubt many NT's, yet alone autistics wouldn't be jaded over it too.

Sadly many autistics want the human race (every man. woman and child on earth) to die in a nuclear Holocaust or whatever so it's no surprise those people have no respect for mere hypothesing over a potential suitable partner.

Happiness, an active bedroom and partnership is afterall the opposite of genocide so some autistics might not agree with it.

Last edited by Nades on 18 Mar 2022, 5:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I don't even like your regular posts here but it appears the accusations are certainly applied against you for no reason to boot.