Aspie marriages

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I am reading Mozart and the Whale and their marriage has gone downhill so Mary left her husband and they were separated for four years. I heard aspie relationships don't usually work out but I'm wondering if there are any aspies here who are married to other aspies? Is your marriage great or do you guys fight a lot or argue a lot? Are you having a Mozart and the Whale relationship?
I was having one with my ex (he had aspie traits) and then my next one wasn't working great with my new boyfriend and he happened to have AS too. I have lot of aspie traits, I was given the diagnoses and I even score "You are very likely an aspie" on the aspie quiz.

No, The Missus is NT. But when I look back at the ladies I dated 20 years ago (been married 17) I wonder if some of them weren't ASpie. I say this because we bounced off each other like two magnets same pole to pole. Indecision, and lack of affection, and nervousness marked these dates. Just never worked.

My husband is AS and I am ADD with AS shadow or chunks. We do have our disagreements but most of the time we get along very nicely. He likes to hang out at home and so do I. He likes to look after the kitchen, I really don't. I like to look after the yard, trees and garden, he doesn't. I like to do vehicle maintenance (Dad was a mechanic) and my hubby would rather take the bus then own a vehicle. It works out well. And, of course, because we can tune people out , if we aren't getting along we just ignore each other. It is very nice being married to someone who understands the whole social issue and the whole obsession thing.

I'm married to an NT and don't think I could be married to an AS. I'm almost positive my best friend is AS and she and I lived together once (as friends by the way) for six months. We clashed big time. When we got along, we really got along and when we clashed it was terrible. We still do that whenever I see her. There is no way I could live with someone like that on an ongoing basis. Dh calms me and makes me more stable. I probably add some spice to his otherwise very controlled existence (at least that's what he claims). We have many interests and things in common, but in lots of ways we are opposites and compliment each other. That is not the case with my most likely Aspie friend.


Now that's just me and other people might feel differently.

I think Jerry and Mary's relationship is very strange and mutually dysfunctional. It is not the kind of relationship I would want.

I have not seen the movie but I think I will rent it tonight. I'm on the phone right now trying to find a copy.

marriage

dunno... still working on that one

workin me feminie wiles on an NT currently... we'll see how that goes lol

I wonder how my being borderline AS/NT will affect an AS/AS marriage.

Tim

It is very helpful because you can understand your spouse's Aspie issues but can be flexible when they can't . I guess that is only if you want to be flexible. I don't mind giving in on issues if my spouse can't (within reason)
It doesn't work if you expect them to be really emotional or care about some of the things that NT's care about. It is not for the emotionally weak!! !

I'm AS/NT. and I don't really care. I'm only 19, and though I'm in college, where it is sorta that crutial point in life where you start to make your decisions about your future.....(and I know a whole hecka lotta people planning on getting married, or in the stages, or married) I'm living right now with a group of guys during the month of may for classes, there are seven of us, including me, 3 of them have girlfriends, and one of them is engaged.

my point being is that should it matter whether or not you marry an AS or an NT?

I am (i guess) AS/ADD and dating an ADDer (who scores NT on aspie quizzes but has a few AS traits)
And we have a truely awesome relationship...playful silly cuddly fun.."synergistic"..a perfect mathc between a "dependant" and a "codependant"...and despite that we have broken up twice for several months at a time....

Hope we don't do that again...but if we did, i think we'd be hard pressed to find anyone as compatable as we are for each other.

Is it true that Aspies can clearly understand other Aspies? Esspecially in a marrage setting?

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Thank You and have a nice day,

_Eric

I cant possibly see a relationship working out between me and a "normal" person, they never have before.