Whats up with my friends crush?

Post Reply New Topic

I have been observing a weird situation that my friend is in, and she keeps asking me what I think, and I am a bit clueless. It started with people telling her this man liked her, and thats it. Then, she decides she likes him, so she wrote to him. She got his number and called him. He didn't write back, or call back. Other friends are telling her he likes her. I saw the other day, they were in the same place for a fraction of a second, she walked near by, he took off running. I think everyone is playing a sick joke on her, but I don't know how to tell her. He literally runs and hides when he sees her. What is with this guy? (He might have asperger's, too) Do you think its a joke, or is he afraid for some reason? What do you aspies think?

I think these people who told your friend that this guy liked her turned around and told the guy some lies about her. I think it is a joke on your friend, and these people are scum. This sounds like a high-school thing. If you're all older than that, these pranksters should start acting their age.

How long has this situation been going on for?
Is this guy being used or is he doing this on his own?
Solution: If in high school, it's fine.
If not, tell these pranksters to grow the hell up already!

Well, its weird. All serious college aged people who are very smart. Everyone age range from 25 to 35. The girl has alot of experience with dating, it is presumed that the guy does not. The girl can't figure out the situation, and neither can I. I would say it is a childish prank, but these people are older. Is he afraid? I am thinking of telling my friend to GIVE UP. She feels like everyone is playing a sick joke on her, but then, she gets the feeling that he is exceedingly shy, and probebly scared, and his friends are trying to do a favor for him. She wants him just to say hi, wave or something, just so she knows that he indeed is interested. She would then not be so upset, and would wait, patiently for him to do what he needs to to get around to asking her out.

This situation has been going on for several months. And he won't make a move. She has tried, but wants him to do it.

I hate to say this, but if she's not going to make an outright obvious first move on him, she might need to just give up. Regardless of whether these people are playing a prank on her (and I really don't think they are if they're in the mid twenties to mid thirties range - adults (yes, even NTs) don't do that kind of crap when they get older), for whatever reason it sounds like the guy is freaked out.

I would advise her to completely back off. Maybe that will give him the space he needs to come to her. Unfortunately, with Aspies, sometimes you just have to be patient.

He might be very shy. When I have a crush on someone, I will go OUT OF MY WAY to avoid eye contact or to be too close to them. It's something I definitely need to work on. People say to me "But you're so good looking, why would you be so weird about approaching someone?". It's so much easier to keep things in the realm of fantasy inside my head than to attempt clumsy overtures, which may lead to disappointment.

You know, I really believe this guy is aspie, and my female friend thinks he is very good looking. She really likes him, but has been totally burned in the past. I told her to wait until he makes a move, which he will maybe never get around to. I am autie, so I know how weird dating can be. Once the obsessive anxiety sets in, conversation is futile. I have been thinking about this alot. I think he has worked himself into such a frenzy, that he needs several months to get over it. PLus, we all go to nerdy smart people college, so I don't think there are games going on. I almost feel like he didn't want it to be real, maybe his fantasy life was comforting, and now, with reality, he is freaking out. Hopefully, she will listen to my advise, but she is really bull headed.