asked a woman out today

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so I asked out a lady tonight at the gym well it do not go good but I will keep on trying
here how it went
(after talking to her for a while)
me:say you like coffee
her: yeah
me: so, how about you buy me some coffee at starbuck
her:uh, no
me: really, oh well
me: hey how you know Im not a millionare
her: well, I don't
me: yeah, I could have been a millionare, I could have gaven you some money
( I think left sometimes after that, and came back)

me: hey, my lawyer are going to talk to you bout not buying me coffee
her: ok
me: well, you have a good thanksgiving, bye

so, no luck for me. But at least Im trying.

dont ask a girl to buy you coffee man

I think the original poster did quite well. I found it funny.

depends on his tone

i disagree. its sonmething thatd be funny if tom cruise said it in a movie, but thats about it. In a gym it will just put you in the weeirdo category. And the further comments about being rich put him in the creepy category

Ah, hmm, assuming this event actually transpired exactly how you wrote...my advice would be not to make any remark after the turn down outside of 'all right' and maybe 'have a good morning/afternoon/night' (followed promptly by ending the conversation and giving her ample space). I'm thinking that sometimes, women are surprised when you ask them out and therefore might initially refuse but may eventually warm up to the idea if you're completely understanding with their answer. I think when a guy accepts a rejection with class, you earn plenty of points...sometimes enough to count for some future conversation if you run into each other again, and just maybe, a second chance at that date.

Skipping all of that technical crap, you've got the most important part, man, the courage to ask a gal out; in that respect, you're already leagues ahead of me

I would have really thought you were trying to get me to buy coffee for you!! ! You should have said how about I get you a cup of coffee at starbucks.

You'd have to be *really* skilled to pull that move off. Aspies are not generally skilled in this area...

I'd offer someone the coffee next time and not whine about not being a millionaire. If you can't buy her a coffee you're either very poor or very cheap - very unattractive qualities.

Please tell me your trolling and didn't actually try this on a girl.

Please...please...please.

You never ask girls to pay for the first date.

Then you go off on a tagent about being a millionare or not.

Then you threaten to "talk to your lawyer" about her not buying you coffee. "Talk to your lawyer" means your going to sue.

I'm not surprised she said no. I'm surprised she didn't add some expletives.

But you did ask her out, that is def a positive. Let's just work on the approach.

Last edited by thewhitrbbit on 19 Nov 2012, 12:57 am, edited 1 time in total.

You have to at least make it playful..when I was single and dating, sometimes women would insist on spoiling me, sometimes women would expect me to pay but the best dates are 50/50..girls tend to have different views on who should pay, I think it depends on their personality types maybe..the more forward independent ones wanted to go 50/50 or pay and the ones I did pay for were less independent..

Keep in mind, the dates that paid for me or went 50/50 ended up in physical intimacy, the few that I payed for didn't really go anywhere and that was only because they didn't have a job.

I really think "hi, how's it going?" followed by appropriate questions and call/response conversational volleys is more effective than the pua openers for someone developing skills. I won't say that stuff doesn't work, I'm not good enough to evaluate, but execution is important and the more basic strategies are easier to learn.

You can make out with a lot of girls by finding common interests and touching them in appropriate ways. Nothing fancier than that is absolutely required, though I admit I get rejected a lot more often than I get anywhere.

it's sad you see it this way. I had thought you were more open minded.A guy isnt poor f he doesnt want to buy a girl coffee. He also isnt cheap. For me it is the principle of the thing(same with tipping people)why should I pay for a coffee for a perfect stranger who most likely doesnt even like me anyway? I only do it because if i don't the self entitled girl will view me as cheap/ The only reason I tip pizza guys or waiters is bc ill get dirty looks, spit in my food, and told to go pick up the food myself. Why should I pick up the food myself when Im paying for the food and the delivery fare? I am not responsible for chuck's pizza salary..he chose to work at pizza hut for his job.
/rant.
although ill admit i am cheap and poor 0.o

It's spot on, that one. I once tried to pull of a similar move for horrible results; and it's hard to transition from there, expecially if it's someone you don't know that well. Also, if she doesn't think the coffee one was funny, then it's unlikely that she'll think differently about the millionaire one or about the lawyer one.

^ wtfid, no better reason than social convention, really, although I usually never invite someone for coffee unless I am already interested, and want to know more about the other person. In those cases I feel the expense is justified.

I laughed because how billiscool did that exchange is HIGHLY reminiscent of what happens where I live. Difference is those guys get dates off of it.

i dont appreciate buying someones time even if i get sex from it..which i dont.