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30 Aug 2007, 2:00 pm

Is there anyone who is bothered by them too?


My boyfriend keeps hugging me and getting on top of me when he hugs me and most of the times I don’t even want it. When he dresses me, he will get on top of me first and I hate it because I want to be dressed so I can get back to my routine. So I push him off now because I can hold it in for so long I can’t anymore and I have ran out of patience.
Especially when we’re in bed going to sleep and I am trying to go to sleep, I hate it when he keeps getting on top of me. I like getting my back rubbed, not having any bodies snuggled up against me or having someone on top of me when I am trying to go to sleep.
I think he over does it because it’s too much. I am now pushing him away now every time, and the next step would be grabbing my diaper out of his hands or my clothes telling him if he isn’t going to do it right, then I will do it myself since he is taking too long. I feel like an as*hole for that but what can I do? I have already used words and they aren’t working so now I am at the aggressive phase now. Maybe that would give him the message.

He says he can’t help himself because he can feel it so he has to do it. I take it as BS because I feel like doing things all the time such as buying games I want and oh when I get mad at people, I always feel like hitting or taking a gun and shooting the person who pisses me off and do I act on it? No. It’ll be like me doing it and then saying, “I couldn’t help myself. I feel it so I have to do it.”

My last two boyfriends were over effectionate but the last one didn't get on top of me when he changed me once in a while. He just did it and got it over with just like I always want.



Tim_Tex
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30 Aug 2007, 2:10 pm

If you don't like it when he gets on top of you, let him know. It's up to him to repsect that.

Tim


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0_equals_true
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30 Aug 2007, 2:55 pm

I has to be said from all of these post you have put recently I'm getting the impression that you are both fundamentally incompatible. I don't think there is much point continuing dating this guy. I didn't reply before because I couldn't be certain what the problem was. I didn't want to come across as a jerk. But it is obvious enough to me so I don't care if I do.

The truth is you want someone to do things like dress you and do your diaper role play and he is more into straight sex/intimacy. You should have said this from the start it would have saved you some time.

It is nobody’s fault, you are as bad as each other to be honest.

You are going to either have to find someone who is into more role play type things and less so into the intimacy/traditional sex or expand your interests figure out if there is any common ground with prospective partners.

Maybe you best bet it is to go looking for someone who is already into it.



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30 Aug 2007, 2:56 pm

I hate over affectionate people too. My boyfriends like that, hes always trying to give me hugs, clinging to me, trying to hold me.. ah it just makes me want to scream. I usually push him away haha. If your boyfriend keeps doing it let him know that its really bothering you and that its not because you don't like him or anything, its just too much for you. I had to sit my boyfriend down to explain that to him, he understood and still tries to get kisses or hugs but if I refuse or push him away he doesn't think I hate him now, he just thinks I just can't give him anything at the moment.



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30 Aug 2007, 3:17 pm

If you dont like it tell him to stop it or he gets the sofa :lol:


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30 Aug 2007, 3:20 pm

I'd rather be with someone who was overly affectionate, than someone who was completely cold and distant all the time.

And really, what they do doesn't matter so much... as what they expect from me. If they want me to match them in affection... all the time... then it might cause trouble.

I'll be affectionate... and show my appreciation for them... but it may not be to the intensity that these kinds want.... or in ways they may appreciate.

But really affectionate women... nothing wrong with that.


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31 Aug 2007, 12:50 am

Well girls I am one of those teddy-bear types and if anything it must contradict my being an Aspie.

The one I'm dating now is lucky to have me :wink:


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31 Aug 2007, 2:36 am

I don't like overly affectionate people either. There are different kinds, I only knew one overly affectionate female that had a romantic interest in me and it was misery.

Other types: The dude who likes to slap you on the back.
Women that like to do that creepy arm grab when they talk to you. Old women are bad about this, though young
women will do this too.
Guys that rough house.



31 Aug 2007, 3:02 am

0_equals_true wrote:
I has to be said from all of these post you have put recently I'm getting the impression that you are both fundamentally incompatible. I don't think there is much point continuing dating this guy. I didn't reply before because I couldn't be certain what the problem was. I didn't want to come across as a jerk. But it is obvious enough to me so I don't care if I do.

The truth is you want someone to do things like dress you and do your diaper role play and he is more into straight sex/intimacy. You should have said this from the start it would have saved you some time.

It is nobody’s fault, you are as bad as each other to be honest.

You are going to either have to find someone who is into more role play type things and less so into the intimacy/traditional sex or expand your interests figure out if there is any common ground with prospective partners.

Maybe you best bet it is to go looking for someone who is already into it.



That was my last one. I have a new one and he is into this stuff too. He wanted a baby girl and he got one. I love the baby treatment I get.



0_equals_true
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31 Aug 2007, 5:31 am

Well maybe you need to question if you want a boyfriend at all. What do you want in a boyfriend?

Maybe you could have 'big daddy buddies' instead and also general friends. Or you could find someone with no sex drive to be you boyfriend. Unless you are ok them having ‘f**k buddies’ and you can have your 'big daddy buddies'.

I'm just making general suggestions. There is no reason why you have do the same thing as conventional relationships. Whatever makes you happy.



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31 Aug 2007, 6:00 am

Kill them.



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31 Aug 2007, 7:33 am

Im a very affectionate and touch oriented person when it comes to relationships, I dont think I over do it though. If anything I would find it flattering if my partner was the same way.



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31 Aug 2007, 8:22 am

Yeah that would annoy me...
I'm too concerned about not screwing up and being real patient most of the time... lol so if someone was over effectionate towards me then that would intrude with my strategy and my way... it would annoy me. I tell you what though - the girl I'm trying to get with certainly ain't clingy lol. And neither am I for that matter - I'm not clingy at all... but she's even less clingy than I am, which means no clinginess at all. :P


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