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Have I been rejected already?

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Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 6:14 am

Last night met this woman with autism (shes 51)l. we did talk about meeting up at pub today. I texted her about on WhatsApp this morning about meeting up and she said “Sorry can’t meet up today have some stuff to sort out that I didn’t do last night but we could meet another day”. Currently she’s online on WhatsApp and I texted about maybe meeting up for a walk or coffee tomorrow but she hasn’t replied back yet.

Do you think I have already been rejected? :(



LittleBeach
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04 Aug 2024, 6:55 am

It’s hard to tell. She could be genuinely busy and planning to meet you another day, or she could be letting you down gently with a vague excuse. If she’s interested she will reply to your walk/coffee question sooner or later.



Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 7:02 am

LittleBeach wrote:
It’s hard to tell. She could be genuinely busy and planning to meet you another day, or she could be letting you down gently with a vague excuse. If she’s interested she will reply to your walk/coffee question sooner or later.



The age gap might be problematic to her



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04 Aug 2024, 7:13 am

LittleBeach wrote:
It’s hard to tell. She could be genuinely busy and planning to meet you another day, or she could be letting you down gently with a vague excuse. If she’s interested she will reply to your walk/coffee question sooner or later.


Yeah, I would back off now. No more messages until she responds and if she responds with a no, or leaves it too late and responds with a "Oh that would have been nice, maybe another time" sort of message, I would reply with an "Okay, let me know if you want to do something when you're next free" and then leave it up to her to contact you.


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Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 7:37 am

DuckHairback wrote:
LittleBeach wrote:
It’s hard to tell. She could be genuinely busy and planning to meet you another day, or she could be letting you down gently with a vague excuse. If she’s interested she will reply to your walk/coffee question sooner or later.


Yeah, I would back off now. No more messages until she responds and if she responds with a no, or leaves it too late and responds with a "Oh that would have been nice, maybe another time" sort of message, I would reply with an "Okay, let me know if you want to do something when you're next free" and then leave it up to her to contact you.



Shame though I felt a really good bond with her



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04 Aug 2024, 7:43 am

Not saying she's blowing you off, just saying don't be too pushy - you've already done enough to let her know that you're interested in seeing her again. Now you have to wait to see how she responds. Hope she felt that bond too.


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Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 7:45 am

DuckHairback wrote:
Not saying she's blowing you off, just saying don't be too pushy - you've already done enough to let her know that you're interested in seeing her again. Now you have to wait to see how she responds. Hope she felt that bond too.



It's quite common isn't it for guys to meet up with women on nights and get there number. Yet when you text them the next day they never respond



DuckHairback
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04 Aug 2024, 7:50 am

No idea how common that is. If she was drinking it may be that she made a decision she wouldn't have done sober.

Who knows? You can drive yourself mad second-guessing people. Try not to over-analyse it. Once she responds, or doesn't, you'll have your answer. Until then, I think a little patience is in order.


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Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 7:55 am

DuckHairback wrote:
No idea how common that is. If she was drinking it may be that she made a decision she wouldn't have done sober.

Who knows? You can drive yourself mad second-guessing people. Try not to over-analyse it. Once she responds, or doesn't, you'll have your answer. Until then, I think a little patience is in order.



She did say last night that I was charming and wants to be close friends. But the lady did say that she thought I was to young to date



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04 Aug 2024, 11:10 am

She pretty much said it herself that the age gap is a problem for her.

It's a bit if a heafty age gap anyway though jamesy. Probably wouldn't have worked out regardless.



Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 11:20 am

Nades wrote:
She pretty much said it herself that the age gap is a problem for her.

It's a bit if a heafty age gap anyway though jamesy. Probably wouldn't have worked out regardless.



Because of our autism we had so much in common to take about



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04 Aug 2024, 11:35 am

Jamesy wrote:
Nades wrote:
She pretty much said it herself that the age gap is a problem for her.

It's a bit if a heafty age gap anyway though jamesy. Probably wouldn't have worked out regardless.



Because of our autism we had so much in common to take about


Even if the age gap is a problem for her, she said she wants to be close friends with you. If she's said that, I wouldn't push for anything more. I highly recommend having women as close friends. You can talk to her about autism as friends. You'll get more comfortable just talking to women. If she gets to know you better it's possible the age thing will look like less of an issue to her, or maybe it won't. You might even meet someone through her that's closer to your age.

Plus it's just nice to have friends, isn't it? If that's all you get, I'd say you're winning.


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Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 11:39 am

DuckHairback wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
Nades wrote:
She pretty much said it herself that the age gap is a problem for her.

It's a bit if a heafty age gap anyway though jamesy. Probably wouldn't have worked out regardless.



Because of our autism we had so much in common to take about


Even if the age gap is a problem for her, she said she wants to be close friends with you. If she's said that, I wouldn't push for anything more. I highly recommend having women as close friends. You can talk to her about autism as friends. You'll get more comfortable just talking to women. If she gets to know you better it's possible the age thing will look like less of an issue to her, or maybe it won't. You might even meet someone through her that's closer to your age.

Plus it's just nice to have friends, isn't it? If that's all you get, I'd say you're winning.



She also defended me from this older women who bullies me at the pub



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04 Aug 2024, 11:44 am

That's a really positive step Jamesy

Just try and keep your cool mate and see what happens

You can do this man. I'm rooting for you


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Jamesy
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04 Aug 2024, 1:08 pm

babybird wrote:
That's a really positive step Jamesy

Just try and keep your cool mate and see what happens

You can do this man. I'm rooting for you



Shouldn’t build my hopes up the last message I sent to her today was 11:30.

She’s currently online yet she has not responded to the message I sent earlier

:?



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04 Aug 2024, 1:17 pm

Yeah I wouldn't invest too much into it at this point

The guys above have made some good suggestions Jamesy


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