What is a girl to do? I know this fellow likes me....

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This guy obviously likes me and I am definitely intrigued. I am feeling pretty ackward. He has Aspergers for sure and I think that I probably do too. (my son has it and several pychiatrists have suggested that I was autistic-like as a child)

Andy and I met at Church. He never asks me out, but Andy will suggest I do stuff where he will be at. Andy futher can not stand it when I talk to other guys; he will walk up and take a conversation away from the other guy. He seeks me out, makes it obvious that he is waiting on me, and will not leave until we talk at Church.

I would not say he is shy, and it is obvious he is as interested in getting to know one another as I. I want to ask him out but I do not want to scare him.

Any Ideas?

Lady U

tell him you are going to have dinner somewhere and maybe he'll decide to have dinner there too (on same night!)

kind use his own approach? im not sure. try seeking him out more.

gl

I don't really have any suggestions for you, I'm afraid, but I'm in a similar situation. However, in my situation the guy in question and myself are attending the same college, so all I have to do is suggest getting something to eat. (I never actually word it as a date and I'm still not sure if he actually recognizes it as one.)

Also I note that I have to be the one to ask him every time. He's never said no and seems to enjoy spending tiem with me; he's just, well, I suppose you could say timid. (I should also note that I've been friends with him since before either of us started college. . . .and that I'm quite literally one of the [i]only[i] people he talks to.)

All I could really recommend is try and phrase it in a way so that he doesn't feel well, for lack of a better term, like it's a "date", date - maybe just tend towards more of the friendship aspect until you're sure he won't be too frightened?

I'm sorry I couldn't be more help.

This guy sounds like you should probably be the one to approach him. If he has AS, then just approach him directly; he will be more able to easily unerstand your intentions (and if he goes out of his way to spend time with you, he is obviously interested in you...) Talking to him more often may make him more receptive in the future (my personal experience is that I have to develop an attraction for women over time, rather than attraction just existing and wearing off over time...)

Another tactic that I keep on recommending to try with an aspie male is to talk to him online. I, for one, am much more comfortable online than I am in RL (the text-based medium levels the playing field), and he may be more responsive in that medium. If he requests to talk in person about any matter, then do so.

The main point to remember, however, is that the more time you spend time with him, the more comfortable he will feel around you.

I'm just answering based on my own experiences; your mileage may vary...

Dont waste your time on him. He will just drain your energy, that's what they do. suck you dry until you have nothing left

I wanna be sucked dry.

I sincerely thank all you that answered so far; I have a lot to think about. I am actually going to Andy's home tonight; his roommate invited me. My Church has a mobile food ministry and a group of us are going to make sandwiches for tommorrow. Andy will be coming in late; he just has been promoted in his job and has been working very hard at it.

I am thinking about asking Andy to show me around in the back yard or something after he has been home for a few minutes; he has indicated he likes quiteness sometimes and so do I. Both of us doing some quiet time together....

Please keep the suggestions coming....

Find a quiet time, hold his hand, then give it a gentle squeeze.

If one or both of you see fireworks at this point then it was worth the effort

Ed Almos

Well I guess I am constantly anemic.

Well I guess I am constantly anemic.

Darling Ed,

Many regrets that you do not live near; what a romanic you do appear.

Lady U