How does having a girlfriend work?

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You meet a girl, you talk, you both like each other, you both spend some time together, you ask her "do you want to be my girlfriend?" If she says no, the friendship is over. If she says yes, what happens? ok let's say you kiss her. Then what? How do the social dynamics between you and her change the moment she passes from being a close friend to being your girlfriend? Are you supposed to call her everyday? Are you expected to take her to the movies every weekend? How much time are you expected to spend with her?

You actually get to talk to women in person and hang out with them?

From personal experience, I found that it doesn't help to over analyze relationships; That only creates additional stress . Just make sure that you don't have to walk on eggshells when you're with your significant other. Too much compromise will wreck a relationship.

Pretty much you just hang out alot because you enjoy being around each other. I am speaking from having a boyfriend, I call him everyday out of habit and routine, but I don't think you need to, it depends on the person. I just think you need to understand them and enjoy their company. I know that how I act with my boyfriend probably wouldn't be percieved as well if I dated someone different. If I compare the social norm of dating behavior with ours, it would be different I guess. He doesn't give me flowers or candy as gifts, he doesn't hold my hand in public or display much affection in public, we don't say "I love you" often, and we are awfuly blunt to each other at times, and I think people think we bicker often. But we like it that way. i don't want chocolates or flowers since I don't really enjoy them, I don't like doing all that social public stuff because I have anxiety as does he at times, our actions to each other speak for themselves so we don't need to say how we feel about each other, and we enjoy debating each other about a range of topics from social issues, philosophy, politics, and religion, and ect. Its funny to act all combative like "So what?! You wanna fight?!" We are currently planning to do a public fight in like a super market or where I work. This will require alot of planning and practice. Haha.

But yeah, it totally depends on the both of you on how to act with each other because everyone is different, and if you treated her like a carbon copy cut of out a girlfriend then it might not be as sincere.

Don't ever ask, 'do you want to be my girlfriend'!

She wants to kiss just as much as you do!

You have to just act like she is now EXPECTED to be your girlfriend...because you are THAT COOL & THAT CONFIDENT. Man, she wouldn't be hangin' around ya if she didn't want to be close to you. And when you want to go do something with her, you say "Let's go see this movie"; or, "We need to take my dog to the vet"; or, "We're going back to my house later". NEVER ASK. SHE WANTS TO BE WITH YOU.

Keep the conversation simple: TALK ABOUT THINGS THAT INTEREST YOU. And when she talks, a.) shut up; b.) hold her hand; &, c.) if you think that you're gonna say something inappropriate STOP & KISS HER

Buy her flowers on YOUR BIRTHDAY to show her how important she is to you.

The best thing about having a girlfriend is that YOU GET TO HANG OUT W/ THE ONE PERSON THAT MEANS THE MOST TO YOU IN THE WORLD...AND YOU DON'T CARE WHAT ANYBODY ELSE THINKS BECAUSE THE REST OF THE WORLD STOPS WHEN YOU'RE WITH HER. It's a beautiful thing Mw99.



(&, p.s. -- nearly every girl is like this. THEY ALL WANT TO HAVE SOMEONE SPECIAL , so if this one don't work out, start hitting on her friend )

wise words ja
wise words

wish I got a girl to notice me

That sounds like a lot of fun, but I'm not sure I'll ever find a woman who will like me for who I am.

you will but I advise you to be confidant. Personally I'm probably alot like you and I've had several relationships the difference is I am confidant (not cocky) and women respond to that. Just be sure to express how much she means to you in what you do then the quantity of time is not as important as the quality. Also try to be understanding but do not let them walk over you. My previous relationship failed because I comprimised too much and then something came up that was really important and she wouldn't take anything but her way thats how I knew I let a problem get too big. Best of luck !

That's something that needs to be worked out between the two of you. I have known people who were very needy when it come to spending time with their boyfriend/girlfriend. I think it would help if you both agreed on the amount of time and where you wanted the relationship to go.

THIS cracked me up!!

You don’t ask, it happens somehow, NT or AS. AS just needs, I don’t know, confirmation? When she introduces you as her bf or calls you her bf, you are golden. In the mean time…introduce her as your friend. “Do you want to go steady” is soooo, um, 1950’s???

Kilroy, I thought you were err... interested in boys :$

I wouldn't know, because no woman has ever expressed an interest in hanging out with me, at least as far as I know.

How much time you spend with her totally depends on what she's like. I am really aloof and don't like calls every day - maybe every few days? A couple of evenings out a week feels about right with some time spent together during the day. But then I know girls who seem to spend all hours of the day on the phone to their other half, (really winds me up to be honest!!).

Short answer - depends on the girl. There's nothing wrong with asking her how serious she expects things to be and how often she'd. like to see you either - I reckon this would save a lot of worry.

I wouldn't take a girl to the cinema every weekend, especially not the same cinema, since i am told people not on the spectrum like to do new things rather than having a set routine.

I asked a girl out b ut apparently I did things wrong.

Definatly dont be prude, I was afriad to touch her cause I cant stand being touched, no kissing no nothing. I would not take her calls but I would respond to her on IM instead, they dont like that eather. As far as the weekends, we sat on my couch and watched TV, i screwed up cause I did not know what to do with her, nevermind the fact I am probably the best guy she has ever been with (the ones before me were all people who mootched off of her and could not offer a good future for her). She thought cause we hung out like friends that I did not loive her and now she is gone... Lesson learned, tho I fear its too late. .

Definatly, call everyday, be affectionate no matter how much it hurts, and definatly try to get outa the house more, its cool to be alone (I thought she wanted that) but definatly turn off the TV and pay attention. I never wanted to come off as clingy or weird, so instead by being distant I non-verbally told her I dont love her and she left, I did not mean it, but thats how she read me. How could I have known I have no dating experience, 25 years old and just still dont know what do to, I am like at the dating level as far as experience as an elementary school child, most middle schoolers now days have more experience then I do, so ya, when I come back to the computer tomorrow or the next day I am certainly going to read this thread carefully to get a few pointers for next time so I can turn my into .