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Asking a girl to find me a girlfriend...

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iddqd
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08 Feb 2008, 9:19 am

Okay, another absurd thread... I was wondering if it's a good idea to ask one of my female friends if she has any single friends that would be interested in me? And if it is, how do I ask? ... on MSN would be easiest, but yeah, what the hell do I say? the girl I was thinking of asking already has a boyfriend, so she's not going to think I'm just using it to hit on her, lol... any advice?



Wolfpup
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08 Feb 2008, 10:50 am

Doesn't sound like a terrible idea to me, though I'm probably the second to last person on Earth to have a clue about this :(



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08 Feb 2008, 1:07 pm

Worth a try!


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LVBen
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08 Feb 2008, 1:34 pm

iddqd wrote:
Okay, another absurd thread... I was wondering if it's a good idea to ask one of my female friends if she has any single friends that would be interested in me? And if it is, how do I ask? ... on MSN would be easiest, but yeah, what the hell do I say? the girl I was thinking of asking already has a boyfriend, so she's not going to think I'm just using it to hit on her, lol... any advice?


Just don't actually use the words "find me a girlfriend".

I would just try to say the following things whenever you get the chances:
-that you are single
-that you are open to being "set up" w/ peoples' friends
-ask if she has single friends (do not ask if she has any "pretty" single friends, but instead ask if she has "nice" single friends)



dark_mage
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08 Feb 2008, 1:39 pm

I agree with you LVBen as this is the best way.



Asterisp
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08 Feb 2008, 2:22 pm

One time two of my friends tried to set me up with a girl, but that was a big failure.

But maybe I could ask one of my female friends, at least they have people knowledge. Something I have a bit, but not sufficient.



lovebat
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09 Feb 2008, 5:07 am

Don't sound too desperate though. Then she'll set you up with her fugliest 8O single friend because she'll think that you'd be happy with anyone. And if that happens, you could end up losing your friendship with the first girl too.



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09 Feb 2008, 12:38 pm

lovebat wrote:
Then she'll set you up with her fugliest 8O single friend because she'll think that you'd be happy with anyone. And if that happens, you could end up losing your friendship with the first girl too.

A few years ago, I would have been happy even with this solution. After all, with my looks, I don't have a right to be picky. Now, I raised my standards a little bit, but only enough to stay away from girls I find truly unattractive.



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10 Feb 2008, 12:08 am

I once had an online friend. . . this girl. . . when I finally got to meet with her it turned out she was very fat and unpleasant. She liked me, thou. . . even stalked me, finding out my phone number and whatnot. . . We continued to chat after that first meeting and I ignored some of her flirting attemtps - they were just crude. I tried to just be a friend. . .
Once after months (she had began telling me she was dating someone awesome and whatnot) I asked her what about introducing me to her friends - she said something "No, I wouldn't do that to a friend of mine; they don't deserve suffering your acquaintance". :x :lol:



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10 Feb 2008, 12:35 am

Doesn't sound like a terrible plan. I'm going to try it out for myself, maybe. I just have to talk with some female friends about it, but it's not something that comes up... and I'm not one to ask for help... though girls are usually very willing to help.

What would be even better is if she already knew me from a party or something, and we just didn't know that either of us were available. Then it's barely even 'setting up' just friends giving us a push in that direction.


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iddqd
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10 Feb 2008, 3:45 am

Alright, thanks... what about asking about a specific girl? Say just kind of mentioning I like her, and if she can find out if that girl likes me back? I mean, there is this one girl, she's in a few of my classes, and she hangs out in our group, but I've never actually really talked to her :s would it be acceptable to kind of tell her I think she's cute? Do you have to really know someone and talk to them regularly to tell them you like them?? ... the thing is though, if I ask her out or whatever, if she says no, it'll get around and everyone would end up knowing :|



Pugly
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10 Feb 2008, 12:54 pm

iddqd wrote:
Alright, thanks... what about asking about a specific girl? Say just kind of mentioning I like her, and if she can find out if that girl likes me back? I mean, there is this one girl, she's in a few of my classes, and she hangs out in our group, but I've never actually really talked to her :s would it be acceptable to kind of tell her I think she's cute? Do you have to really know someone and talk to them regularly to tell them you like them?? ... the thing is though, if I ask her out or whatever, if she says no, it'll get around and everyone would end up knowing :|


The social stigma is less than what you are imagining. The only downfall is that she may want you to go talk to herself, maybe... but I bet it's small. Just get the word out, that you like her, and you are looking for a relationship.

I've often second guessed myself out of doing this, and I regret it every time.


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Wonder what it feels like to be in love?
How would you describe it, like a push or shove?
Guess I could pretend that this is all I need
Wanting more than what I have might appear as greed.


0_equals_true
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10 Feb 2008, 1:04 pm

iddqd wrote:
Alright, thanks... what about asking about a specific girl? Say just kind of mentioning I like her, and if she can find out if that girl likes me back? I mean, there is this one girl, she's in a few of my classes, and she hangs out in our group, but I've never actually really talked to her :s would it be acceptable to kind of tell her I think she's cute? Do you have to really know someone and talk to them regularly to tell them you like them?? ... the thing is though, if I ask her out or whatever, if she says no, it'll get around and everyone would end up knowing :|

If she can find out discretely it might be an idea.

One thing to note: Sometimes we think people would know about us when there is no reason to. It is to do with theory of mind. So don't assume the girl has noticed you much, unless you are spending much time with her.