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MsJ
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

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Joined: 17 Feb 2008
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 65

20 Feb 2008, 2:08 pm

So just a few days ago, I discovered there was a name for the way I am, which is why I wound up here. From my slap-dash 'net research, I gather I have mild Asperger's Syndrome (it was more pronounced when I was a child, but I've trained myself out of some of the more not-so-socially acceptable behaviors). So I forwarded a few links and a couple of online tests to my boyfriend of 14 years (we've lived together for 10). And guess what? He's even more of an Aspie than me!

I should have figured - he's definitely uncomfortable in social situations, is empathy-challenged (as am I), would eat the same thing every day if he could, has really sensitive hearing and a load of other clues I could mention if I wasn't a little distracted at the moment.

This has also made some things clear to him about me, like my penchant for speaking too loudly sometimes (I'm "better" at this now - I used to be really bad when I was younger!). When I told him this was something that some Aspies did, he said, "Oh! I thought you were just showing off." Same thing with my use of multi-syllable words - I'm not showing off, it's just that sometimes they're the only words I can think of to use.

For me this is ideal - even though I don't think he really "gets" me in a lot of ways, he doesn't pry where I don't want him to, either. And there are things we have in common - ways of thinking or behaving - that make living with him easier than it might be with an NT.

Any other Aspies in a relationship with a fellow Aspie? Any thoughts?

-J.



AndersTheAspie
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Joined: 6 Feb 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
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Location: On the edge of civilization. Denmark.

20 Feb 2008, 2:27 pm

I find that what people are looking for more than anything else is someone who understands them. Now who could understand an aspie better than a fellow aspie?
I doubt it is really so much of a coincidence as it is a case of being attracted to someone who is like yourself, even if you didn't know why you were alike at first.


_________________
Once I knew everything, then I got smarter, now the only thing I know is that I know nothing.
Strange how that worked out isn't it?


MsJ
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

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Joined: 17 Feb 2008
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 65

20 Feb 2008, 6:32 pm

I just want to say that your tagline has pretty much been my lifelong credo, even as a child. Still think it's true. 8)