How should I act?

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So there is this guy at my school.
We have a ton of friends in common, so we ended up sitting at the same lunch table this year and we have gotten to know each other over the course of this school year. He's a grade below me, but is only a few months younger than I am.
Everyday during lunch he sits either directly across from me or right next to me and listens to me and makes me laugh. And if another friend is having a crummy day, instead of completely avoiding the crying girl like most teenage guys instinctively do, he actually makes an effort to make them feel better. We always catch each others obscure videogame references that no one else gets. Basically, he's a genuinely considerate, sweet, and funny guy.
Anyway, I'm really comfortable around him, for the most part, and we can talk for a long while without either of us feeling bored or antsy.
The only time it's ever awkward is when the topic of conversation at the lunch table turns to dating or something like that. Whenever that happens he seems like he's trying to avoid looking at me and the coversationis kind of awkward. Then the topic changes again and things are back to normal.
Thusday night we were both at this thing at school and I said hi and talked to him for a bit. He complemented my dress and said I looked nice. I blushed and we talked a bit more about random stuff, until eventually we both got distracted and started talking to other people. One of my friends came over and asked me if I liked him. I was caught off guard and told her that i didn't. I'm pretty sure I was bright pink when I told her that, so I doubt she believed me.
When he started talking to me again, later, I got really nervous and I'm sure he noticed.

I like him, and I think he likes me somewhat too, but I don't know what to do about it.
How do I let him know?
Should I act differently? How?

Last edited by Jaejoongfangirl on 11 Feb 2008, 8:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Well there's always the test of just leaning into him if you're sitting next to him...if he puts his arm around you (or at the very least doesn't try to throw you off) then he probably likes you.

Also, as you're an aspie (and gathering from what you mention of him, he may, at the very least, have some aspie qualities), you can probably ignore the stupid social convention that "guys have to ask the girls out", and just approach him directly.

I probably should have also mentioned that one of my friends liked him and that she asked him to a school dance recently.
That makes things a wee bit more difficult.
I don't know if she still likes him or what, but it seems to me she just wants to have a date for the sake of having a date. On the rare occasion she sits with us, she doesn't even talk with him. She just half listens when he talks and ignores his attempts to include her, and then she talks with and makes faces at her sister, who sits a few tables away.

@ToadOfSteel: Your leaning advice is good, but I don't want her mad at me, so I don't know what to do.

I hate how things are so dang complicated in high school. I cannot wait until college. -_-;;

It sounds like she's no longer interested in him.
My understanding is that it's generally acceptable to ask her if she's still interested in him.

Otherwise I agree with ToadOfSteel's comments.

How is your eye contact?

If you don't meet his eyes often enough that could be confusing him.

In this day and age I think that you should just ask him on a date.

Bettter get moving. A lot of girls will be trying to beat the Feb 14th deadline.

Well... Valentines is comming up. Why not give him one of those cheesy cards?
They are easy to pass off as a joke if he doesn't react favorably. Although if your contact is as strong as you make it seem then I don't think there is much chance of that.
Now without seeing this female friend of yours, I really couldn't judge her interest in the boy. However I would trust my instincts, and clearly yours say that she isn't all that interested.

He likes you. Tell him you like him. He's found a girl who he is attracted to, is slightly older (thats awesome), and who shares his interest in videogames . He'll probably feel like he hit the jackpot. I'm jealous.

Thank you for all your advice, everyone! You are all so encouraging!

So the first thing I'm going to do is ask my friend if she still likes him, see how she reacts, then go from there.
Wish me luck.

I'm so greatful for everyone's input, you guys are so helpful. Thanks again!(:

First, I just have to express how adorable that little story was. Ah, to be young and in love as they say. Well, I'm not really that age yet but anyway. I don't think I can add a whole lot to what the other have said, but it certainly seems like he likes you.

I can understand not wanting to make your friend upset by stepping on her toes, or what you're supposed to call it, but in some cases stepping on toes is what is needed when trying to get what you want. May sound a bit aggressive, but in these cases, that's the way I do it. If you like him, and you think he likes you then I say go get him! And let the toes be stepped upon!

That's what I think in any case. Good luck!

*sigh*
So today I had a chance to ask her if she still liked him and I completely botched it.
I took too long or something and she got distracted and wandered off with someone else before I had a chance to ask.

She was so nice last year, seriously one of the sweetest people ever, but this year she is trying to join a new crowd and always blows me off if anyone 'more interesting' is around.
Now I'm like her back-up friend or something. I hate it when things like that happen. It happened to me last year with another friend and I was pretty much devestated because I had relied on her so much and then she abandoned me. ):
I'm better this year though. I gained alot more self-confidence and now I have my own friends who genuinely care about me. So yay. (:

But anyway, I was thinking of asking his best friend (who I can contact online) about whether or not she thinks I have a chance. I also know his older sister and have her e-mail address but that would be awkward and I doubt she'd even know.
Do you guys think it's a good idea to ask his best friend? I know her really well and I trust her too, but would e-mailing her be considered creepy or an invasion of privacy? I don't know how I'd word the message either...
Any more advice?

Also, on a slightly related, but happy note, I got new glasses on Sunday and he complemented me on them today. Twice actually.
He's so sweet.

I just talked to one of my close friends who goes to another school and I got the same advice from her: Just tell him.
How? I can't just come out and say that in the middle of lunch. He'd think I was insane!
He's also in my computer class, which is last period on wednesday (the day after tomarrow).
I guess I could talk to him then? But still, I don't know what to say without possibly making things completely awkward later...

I've been in the same position, just with the genders reversed... I love a woman (still! after 6 years) and despite the very ample opportunity, I cant bring myself to tell her...

That's sounds like a pretty good opportunity. In this case, what you need to do is try to get some alone time with him. Take him aside, or maybe follow him out when your last class ends. The important thing is that you tell him face to face so that you can have his undivided attention. But only do it if you feel up to it and emotionally ready. Think ahead about what you want to tell him. And from there, just follow your heart. I'm sure you'll find the right words.

Yay indeed

When you DO tell him, make sure that he is in a place where he feels comfortable, you don't wanna push him into a corner.

Also, if you trust this friend of his, then you might want to ask for her advice, she knows him better than we do at least. I wouldn't do it over email though...

What happens after computer class?
Does he always have people around him?

You need to get him on his own.

How about suggesting some activity e.g. going for coffee, to see a movie e.t.c.
If he suggests inviting anyone else say that you would prefer that it was just the two of you.

Then you have him for a few hours

Gah.
I still don't know what I'd say...
I don't think I can do it tomarrow. I mean, he's usually alone after computer class, but still... I don't know what I'd say and I need to go to bed now so I'm not exausted in the morning.
Maybe I'll figure out something next week.
Or not. I don't even know.
I'd just hate to lose him as a friend if he doesn't like me back.