Affection as a stim?

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Hi!

I've been seeing someone for 1.75 years now and she started discussing how I'm constantly trying to hug her and be comforted by her and so forth. I'm trying to back off on it now. However, she brought up the possibility that I'm using affection as a kind of stim for emotional security and support. It certainly feels addictive enough to be a stim.

Affection as a stim also seems to be consistent with the fact that after our relationship became more emotional, I became much calmer overall -- and hooked on the contact with my girlfriend. It's almost like what you'd expect if there's a stim involved.

Does anyone else have this problem? If so, what do I do about it?

Thanks in advance,

ACG

Well I like to engage in hugs with friends of mine, regardless of gender, with more romantic hugs with the women I'm attracted to. While I would definitely classify it under a sensory issue, I don't think it's a stim per se...

Stim or no stim?

Stim

The one stim I am most afraid of getting addicted to again.

Am I the only Aspie who has no idea what a stim is?

It's more common in autism but found in many people in the spectrum.

It refers to repetitive body movements or repetitive movement of objects. One reason for it is it provides self stimualtion to arouse the nervous system. Another one is that it helps calm a person down as the person's sense is hypersensative. That is the environment can be too stimulating and the person is in a state of sensory overload.

You know, I'm the opposite. I freak out when someone hugs me. I don't hate hugs but I have this feeling of being attacked when it happens.

I kind of envy you on that. People think I'm a jerk because of this.

Yeah, I can definitely see that. I'm kind of the same way, i.e. an affection-whore.

I find affection to be a stim, definitely. My boyfriend doesn't seem to mind, either.