topics to talk about with your girlfriend/boyfriend
Hi, I have a girlfriend, shes 22, im 21, we have a lot in common, but one thing I find hard is communication (I always find that hard), I talk with her, about important things like sex, and what not, but I find that most the time, our time spent together is very quiet, and I wish I could just talk with her a lot more then I do, its just hard for me to find topics. I dont wanna talk about tv shows, or sports, no small talk, I want important things to talk about. Anyone have suggestions?
One thing I learned is that while it seems awkward, silence can be a very good thing. It allows another person time to say something. Monloguing will generally turn out negatively as the other person doesn't want to hear you talking nonstop. If you don't have anything to say, it generally isn't a good thing to try to make up too much stuff.
On the other hand, you do need to talk some, so talk aabout her. Thats always a good thing. Ask her questions, but don't "interrogate her." Also, talk about your job or your school, or her job or her school. Thats not really smalltalk.
What do you have in common? you should talk about that.
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larsenjw92286
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Joined: 30 Aug 2004
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oh yes the silcence is great, I love it, it isnt akward at all because we are both kinda quiet, (thats one thing we got in common), talking to her about her is a good idea, because she is a wonderfull women, and she has quite a bit of good qualities. We never really have the akward silence, it just seems like we have to much silence, and not enough chit chat!
I talk about meaningful stuff with my boyfriend.
I also talk about the most fantastically inane, stupid, ridiculous things (and do the most inane, stupid, ridiculous things as well) with my boyfriend.
Basically I just see how often I can crack him up - he, like me, is known for being largely deadpan (I have more affect than him IMO but still get the "you never smile" every so often), so it's extra rewarding when I can make him laugh. An example of this would be my running out of ways to be funny in a subjective sense and calling everything in the room we were in "horrible and meaningless." I got about as far as "The cat is horrible and meaningless" and he lost it. It was awesome.
But hey, that's just the perspective of one Aspie who, [sarcasm]through some bizarre twist of fate[/sarcasm], has a sense of humor.
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