CAn I just have a moan about my husband please?

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For the last 8 years my AS husband has said to me at least 2-3 times a week, that he should never have got married to me, and he wishes he was by himself, and the best part of his life was when he was in prison and in his cell for 23 hours and did not have to socialize. He is only here because of the kids, and that I am not a good enough mother to be trusted to bring them up alone (in a spiritual sence). To him, these words are just how he sees things. To me it is a cold cold relationship.

My relationship is a bad example, and furthermore my husband is an alchoholic and a drug addict.

I did not know he had aspergers. BUt now I do, I know he is not going to change.

any advice?

You want us to give you permission to do what?

First there is no connection between criminality and Aspergers. Some people turn to crime, depending on their personality.

Secondly he sounds like an ass. He is probably not communicating properly or knows what he wants.

An alcoholic is an alcoholic, regardless of AS status...

most women with AS partners have usually decided to leave prior to getting a diagnosis.
they use the AS as an excuse ( or valid reason) to leave the relationship easily.

they come to these boards and forums and discuss the pro's and cons of leaving and their posts are attempts to justify doing same.

you have left the relationship you just havent left him yet.

well. How can I encourage him to well see the damage he has done to our relationship? He does not care?

Will he ever care? I am looking for the AS view.

Not complaining as such, just looking for a solution.

I had stuck it out thinking his nastyness was drug/alchohol related, and due to a difficult childhood etc..... but now I see the AS side of him........ I see littlte hopr of change?

Regardless of the reasons he got into the junk, some people are like that on it and others would just be detached.

dump him!

types like that will only bring you down with them

Nah he has complex problems. Yes becoming a drug addict is a coping strategy for AS and many other thing. That doesn't mean he isn't a drug addict.

Knowing he has AS may or may not help him come to terms with himself and aid in his recovery. But really it is up to him.

oh! it is not that simple, we have too children and my oldest son has AS
he needs his father, he understands how he thinks?

I admire some addicts like chet baker, but to live their life you got to be kidding.

You can do all the support s**t later (If you really want to stick around), he has to turn a corner by himself.

I wish I could leave him.

My husband is 52 and stuck in his ways. But surely I could learn about AS and help him?

He is off drugs for 6 weeks so I have hope, He only takes Amphetamines lately, because he is too tight with his cash for cocaine (which would be his choice).

He cant sleep without drink, surely this day and age that could be seen as normal?