I find this girl attractive but......
Hi I have Asperger's and I find one girl who has goes to my school very attractive but I have never spoken to her but she has only been in one of my classes and none this semester. I see her sometimes in the library or computer lab but I think she may see me as a stalker because I am at the same place as she is at the same time and she leaves 5 minutes after I come in but I am not one. What should I do? Should I try to talk to her one day? I however am a 19 year old guy who has never had a relationship with a member of the opposite sex and do not really know how to speak to girls.
I'd say give yourself a break. If you're not a stalker, then she's either paranoid or oblivious to your being in the same place at the same time. Don't be too hard on yourself there.
You could go talk to her. That's allowed. Here's something to give your mind a rest:
If this girl has been in class with you and seen you a few times, your fate as to dating is already decided. The way humans work is, women choose men first, and the men have to take the opportunity. She's already decided whether she likes you or not, thinks you're cute, etc. Trust me. So you can go and talk to her and ask her to have coffee or something. If it doesn't work, it simply means she's decided you're not her type long ago. If she says yes, then you've nabbed the opportunity life has left there for you. Either way, you lose nothing by asking except maybe a bit of dignity, and that's not worth much on the open market these days. Best wishes!
_________________
Whatever you can do,
Or dream you can do,
Begin it.
Boldness has genius,
Power and magic in it.
--Goethe
Last edited by GroovyDruid on 03 Dec 2005, 2:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
i wouldn't speak to her... if she's already creeped out by you (whether its your fault or not) the only way you might end up becoming friends is if some mutual friend introduces/vouches for you. Don't think too much about girls that seem 'perfect yet unattainable' I'm finding more & more that when I meet girls I can connect with, I know that we're compatible very quickly after we meet.
Its a good idea to be comfortable enough with those stuck-up types that you can talk with them, because it will help keep your charms a little bit more in practice, but don't get hung up over them, save that for the girls you really feel a connection with
_________________
Join the ASAN social groups in NYC & NJ!
http://aspergers.meetup.com/309/
http://aspergers.meetup.com/318/
As a female, my advice would be to talk to the lovely lady. We appreciate being talked to, but be yourself. If she doesn't like you, plenty more fish in the sea.
_________________
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away.
Henry David Thoureau, 1854
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