texting

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Hi, I need help.

If you're going out with someone, how often do you text them?

I've been going out with someone for quite a while now and one thing that's bugging me is that unless we're face to face, I never hear from him, not even 'goodnight' anymore (we used to, but it's stopped more or less and last time I texted goodnight, I didn't get a reply).

Am I alone in thinking that you should text goodnight to your bf/gf? Even if you're seeing them in a couple of days time?

My boyfriend and I don't text things like "goodnight" or any greetings, we use it only when we have to since it's impersonal. Really, it's a convenience. Often, though, we text in order to let each other know when to call, since we're in a long distance relationship. We call to tell each other goodnight, every night since we both agree it feels cold, distant and rather pointless to text.

That's interesting, thanks. I agree that texting is quite impersonal- in day to day communication, I wouldn't bother with things like 'xxx' etc.. to make it more friendly, but in the evening, we used to just stick a ' ' or something at the end.

I'm not in a long-distance relationship though- I just saw him earlier today and I'll be seeing him again in a few days, so I'm wondering if that has an impact?

It really is one of the sticking things in our relationship (I don't know if he's aware of it though; I did try to broach the subject, but I think he either forgot or didn't take it seriously) and has been annoying me since we started going out. I don't think a phone call is necessary, I'd just like to hear from him...

I love texting but I don't think my gf likes to text.

When I dated an aspie, We texted every available minute of every day.

As often as you'd like to so long as they dont feel annoyed by it. There's really no rule for the frequency of txmsging, its the sort of thing that you just play by ear as the saying goes.

thanks, but the thing is, I think he's okay with how things are now. I'm not though and I hate appearing to be clingy. To be honest, neither of us are very talkative, but I've tried my hardest. I may be 'splitting' here, but when I don't hear from him, I hate him for not wanting to talk to me or communicate... even though when we're together, it's easier (still hard, but not as bad as when we first started going out). He hasn't rung back (he was supposed to talk to me on AIM too- he even suggested it and yet he hasn't showed up at all. This has happened before). I don't know, it sounds petty, but there also doesn't seem to be much point in staying in a relationship if the other person doesn't want to talk to you

Thanks Badaspie and devster21, for your replies too- It's good to hear that there is no 'norm' for texting

my reply

Every day as much as possible and as they will allow, if they tell me I'm texting them too much then I reduce it

there were 2 exceptions to this, my ex, as she's a member of wrongplanet, I spoke to her on the chat room and MSN normally, and my first girlfriend, as she didn't have a mobile phone at the time (she does now much to my horror)

anyway, as i'm currently single I'm not going to get much use from my phone

OMG LOL X 1000 BAG

@TEOTD TXT UR GF OR PARZ 4 GNYTZ

TXT UR BF 4 121

NUF SED

BBFN

Grow up. I asked for advice, not sarcasm.

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Pikachu, it seems that even if you didn't text your girlfriend, you still kept in contact with each other frequently, which to me is the same thing; you wanted to talk to each other and enjoyed chatting. My bf doesn't; even when I get him on AIM (at 4am), the conversation is mainly about him, with a token 'so how's you?' at the end- not that he even comments on what I say.

That IS advice, not sarcasm! (Well ... except for the first line ... sorry 'bout that)

Translation:

At the end of the day, text your girlfriend or parents for "Good-Nights."

Text your boyfriend only for your one-to-one, or personal, greetings.

That's all I have to say.

Bye-bye for now.

No worries. I couldn't read the rest of the statement, so I thought it was of a similar vein.



Sorry, I still don't really understand. By girlfriend, do you mean female friends? Also, what are 'one-to-one/personal greetings'?

I thought you knew how to text.


Sorry; I should have texted BFF or FF.


Oh, good grief!

What do you think personal, one-to-one greetings involve?

They weren't rhetorical questions.

I use text the same way I would type. Mainly to communicate, sometime to wish my parents goodnight, or up until recently, my boyfriend. I hardly hear from him at all otherwise, so why is this too much to ask?

I don't know.

I text my boyfriend in the morning, mostly to wake him up so he'll get on AIM (unless he wakes up first, then he sends the first text), and when I'm at work if one of us aren't at the computer (yeah... I have nothing to do at work most days, so I waste time talking to him by texting or on AIM, and browsing WP!). I don't text him good night, since I'm usually at his house until late anyway, unless the roads are bad and he tells me to text when I get home so he knows I'm still alive. If I have access to the computer, I'd rather just use AIM since I don't have free texting. (I also don't like talking on the phone for very long, and we see each other everyday anyway, so we just use AIM mostly.)
If you can't see each other almost everyday face to face, you should at least communicate in some form everyday.

I know this might seem like a bit of a weird question, but do either of you pay for texts? My bf gets free texts and he's always texting me, but I have to pay for mine so often I don't send him a reply if it's not necessary. If I was only texting one or two words, and if it was only a goodnight I probably wouldn't bother. Also there's the possibility if he didnt get the text for a while after you'd sent it he might have assumed you'd already gone to sleep, and there doesn't seem much point to me in sending a goodnight if it won't arrive until the morning. I might be being a bit too practical though.