So Aspie gals don't want Aspie guys. Do Aspie guys have a ch

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...ance with anyone?

(PLEASE DEVELOPERS, WOULD YOU JUST EXTEND THE CHARACTER ALLOTMENT ALREADY? WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SO SHORT? THIS FRUSTRATES US TO NO END. If you have a donation link somewhere, can we say that maybe $30 will tell you to extend it?)

All it takes for us is practice, practice, practice, doesn't it? Eventually, practice makes perfect. Would you agree?

What are the odds of an Aspie guy getting married anyway?

a lot of AS guys are either pricks, self indulged weirdo's or just unpleasant in many cases
(from what I have seen)
they care only about how things would effect them-and are self centered and rude
they take no blame for themselves and just sit alone and b***h about it and wonder why they get nowhere
one day they have to get up and do what everyone else does-try, fail and try again
I woke up and figured that out, hasn't gotten me really far but its a start and its pretty cool
sadly a lot of them will never learn

[quote="Kilroy"][/quote]
...Was Here.

I'll see how much of those I can check-mark about myself...

So, what happens when people do take blame for something they would hate to? Do people like them better? Do better things happen? What?

well I don't know

its not about taking blame its confidence, and not screaming to the world-I have AS-love me and all my weird things-I refuse to change
everyone changes in a relationship
you know-you have to...well I am the wrong person to ask-I haven't been all that successful with love
BUT I tried, and don't regret trying, and I still try-I am trying at school with a girl I know-very least I have her as a friend
and she's a cool person

I think I'd rather date a guy with AS. I've dated quite a few NT guys and they just don't understand me and why I do some of the things I do. They usually end up feeling neglected and break up with me or don't give me enough space and I break up with them for being clingy. In short, they're too emotional and I don't have enough patience for them. It'd be nice to have a companion that has the same energy, emotional level, idiosyncrasies, obsessive personality, etc... Don't sell yourselves short, AS men.

Practice makes perfect? Maybe...

Practice with continued failure can make you more depressed and neurotic too. No one likes to play a game they continually fail at. I think it's a testament to the determination of the AS guys who keep on trying.

As for me, I've failed enough that I just assume I'm going to fail again every time I talk with a girl. This has helped me to be more confident and relaxed. It makes the eventual pain a little easier to take... despite my indifference the pain still lingers... wish that would go away.

There's still the notion that if you don't try you lose out 100% of the time. That seems a silly notion too tell someone that loses 100% of the time even if they do try. I still get the point though...

I think the best advice, is just throw yourself into social situations. It'll be uncomfortable and weird and strange... and perhaps even depressing sometimes... but you may just get comfortable and grow endearing to those around you if you stick to it long enough. And perhaps eventually find love.

What am I trying to say... I forgot... oh yeah everyone is special in their own way and just be yourself... and stop to smell the roses...

Well, that was a very blunt and tactless observation you described of AS males Kilroy!

Lmao at you Kilroy, you are displaying the arrogant and insulting behaviour you attack in AS males. Not disagreeing with your observation, just the presentation aspect.

Unfortunately, many Undx and Dx AS males are affected by a neurological problem that makes them appear to possess some of those endearing qualities you have described. Some will never have a emotional relationship with a female, whether AS or non AS, if they do not choose to accept they have deficiencies in personality. My suggestion is if they wish to interact with females positvely, spend the money and have some behavioural therapy. (I know we can't be cured, but we are not machines, we can learn new skills)

Visit Tony Attwoods website in regards to relationships. He does not criticize AS males for their deficiencies, but suggests therapy to develop skills that we do not possess naturall/automatically. You may meet that one female, but you maybe 50yrs old by then, increase your odds with skills you decided to develop to improve quality of life.

Throughout my youth I developed mimmicking skills from observing non AS males interacting with females. Never had an issue with attracting females, too easy, making a close connection was impossible. I must have appeared like the most heartless bastard to these females, as if I was just using them for something. In the contrary, how do you mimmick emotional closeness/love, could have used some guidance/therapy in producing and feeling the emotions needed to sustain a relationship. I have all the emotions/feelings inside, they are just scrambled and difficult to find when necessary.

Dude... looking at the sort of rubbish you post here... what do you expect aspie girls to want?

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postp1899353 ... t=#1899353

There is a prime example. for f***s sake... /facepalm.

I'd rather date an Aspie than an NT.

[quote="lotusblossom
I dont think people can keep up the acting that 'skills' require. I think if you be yourself you will atract someone who likes you, the more you act the more likely you are to attract someone who is not your fit.

I think one is better off alone than in an unhappy relationship and that the best way forward is to know yourself and what you like and you are more likely to meet someone who matches that.

or we will be alone untill our death....[/quote]

Think you missed my message. Yes in my youth I mimmicked(Acted) behaviour which was required to attract a female. My point was that we learn the skills to interact positively with females. Many do not possess these automatic social skills and production of appropriate emotions for closeness. I'm not suggesting they begin acting emotions or behaviour to attain a relationship. Develop the skills and emotions they have, but cannot access them because of AS. Having AS, being a husband and parenting children canbe very challenging, speaking from experience.

Tias, you make valid comments about childhood difficulties and early social trauma affecting our psychology. Supports my view therapy is a positive option for positive adjustments. Just make sure the therapist specialises in Aspergers, others have little knowledge of our neurological differences.

Talking about people who has to know what they are doing.

When i was on a special school, or class with other aspies (we were total of 4 guys) i had a teacher who used to scold me, or get annoyed/pissed of when i repated part of what she asked me.

I mean wtf is her problem? she later on tried to correct me into not saying it
I mean if she even had the SLIGHTEST idea of what she was dealing with, she would have known better.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Echolalia

but yeah, like i said, it annoys me a great deal how kilroy just talks of us aspies of being selfish and etc. I Really do hope he has atleast CONSIDERED why some of us are the way we are.
I for one, dont open up to just anyone, i'm different, and my behavior can be weird for most NTs, and i dont have much else to talk with others about.
I dont have emotional attacthments to anyone, well i had for my girlfriend when we were together, but after whats shes done and etc, i dont have any for her either.

When my grandma once cried because someone close to her died, let me be damn honest, i didn't care, i couldn't feel anything about it, while the others around her got sad, and some others cried to, i was almost about to laugh cause i thought it was funny, did i do it cause i'm sadistic? No, i just couldn't see the reason for them to cry, i cant CONNECT on a emotional level as easy as it is for NTs to do so, and i have no reason at all to connect emotionaly with my family at all when i hate them. Heck, when my dad was fixing some lights in the house and he got an electric shock due to something, i again laughed abit and found it amusing instead of getting worried.

And now about the selfish part.
I'm only selfless to the very few friends i have.
Well i dont like borrowing money from them, for like lunch or anything, when i do, i try to repay them ASAP, and same way i dont like borrowing money to much either, and want it back ASAP, so there is no debt.


@Kilroy
I dont know how it's for other aspies, but seriously, going around and saying people are this and that without knowing them is just ridicules Kilroy, please be atleast abit more considerate, it's the same as saying "almost all the black people are xxx and yyy" it's sterotyping and generalizing

The truth is we cannot be something we're not. We are not NT and never will be NT. By pretending to be something we're not like the NT world wants it will slowly eat away at us and kill us. The NT way does not work for us and it never will.

What makes you think aspie gals don't want aspie guys?


Kind of a broad statement isn't it?