Infatuated

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I've been talking to this chick on Craigslist, I'm 21 and she's 36, she's very beautiful, professional, educated blah blah blah. But she stopped sending me emails.

I'm thinking she sees the age difference as incompatible with her social life, while she may have been interested at the time she thought it over and it just isn't worth it.

Needless to say I'm feeling disappointed.

That's quite the age gap.

She also could have found someone she likes more than you. Dating sites are ultra competitive... especially for those beautiful,professional types.

But it's always disappointing when it appears to be going great and then *poof* nothing. Women are great and making you feel good... um...even with just conversation...

Does this thread serve a purpose?

NT replies. I think it's a very valid discussion. I'm really sorry you're bummed out. I have recently reconnected with an old friend (think 28 years ago) via facebook. We had a strong connection back then but he was never my boyfriend. He lives on another continent now. He was writing and then he suddenly stopped. I have written again and asked WHY and he did not reply. It hurts. ALOT. But I don't know him or anything about him anymore. Maybe it's fear. Maybe he's married. I'm married and I told him I was married. I asked him if he was married or single or straight or gay. No response. Personally, I don't like indirectness, secrets,evasiveness, etc...
In your situation, it could be the age gap. Or she met someone else. Maybe her grandma died and she had to fly off to Timbuktu. I'm sorry you're left wondering why. She was wrong not be direct and honest.

I had the same thing happen to me. This woman was an Aspie, and wouldn't tell me why she won't talk to me sooner than once a month, and was expecting me to read hints, yet demanding that other people communicate with her directly. And when she and I started corresponding, nearly 2 years ago, she told me she "would never disappear without a good reason".

The last time I heard from her was January 2nd, and I am very hurt because I was very attached to this person.

An Aspie expecting another Aspie to read hints?

Tim, maybe she wasn't really quite AS; my friend and I have some of the AS traits because we're ADHD, and we do the hint-dropping thing all the time. The AS friend I had in school (girl) didn't do the vague communication thing whatsoever, which was refreshing.

As for the topic being bunk, Geniuskid, you've got to be kidding -- this particular section looks to be designed for just such posts. Read the description.

Anyway, I've said it before on here, but I find the idea of taboos surrounding age difference absolutely useless. There's no doubt there will be experience difference in many (but not necessarily all) cases in age gap relationships, but this doesn't need to make or break it if there are other positive factors.

It's unfortunate that it's far less acceptable for a man to be younger than a woman in the relationship than the reverse.

Actually, she's diagnosed. She and I never dated, but I was nonetheless attached to her even in the friendship phase.

When I was 20, I had the same thing going on with a 30-something chick in my class. There was mutual attraction, but I was a bit too chicken to make a move (we went on some dates), and nothing ever happened. She seemed somewhat jealous when I finally got a GF, and we never really talked after that.

Honestly, don't feel bad, it wasn't meant to be. Women in their 30s, unless they are somewhat dysfunctional, are pretty much on a different level in terms of needs. You're just starting out your life, and they see you as unstable and someone who could dump them for a much younger woman at any moment. Meanwhile, they are probably looking for marriage and to settle down quickly, especially if they are into their 30s and the biological clock is ticking.

Just think of it as practice, and keep practicing. And who knows, she might get bored or curious and come back into your life. Just be sure to leave it alone for now, don't bug her, and wait for desire to build on her end.