Tried being frank?

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No, not pretending to be a person named Frank, i mean being sincere.


When you meet someone you would really be intrested in but do not know what to say to, have any of you tried walking up to that person and tried saying something like:

"Look, i have <this or that> and i do not really know how to tell you this, i am really

A) intrested in you
B) attracted by you

and i would love to go out on a date with you."

If you did, what was their reaction? Did it work? Did they run away when they saw you the next time?

I have been thinking about using such a "line" to get over the whole social-encryption pheromone-exchange protocol that normal people use.

Sometimes it works, but that's more with gay men than heterosexual women. Women tend to want a challenge, and to not be so direct. It really kind of blows any bargaining position you might have -- you've "shown your cards" and now are at their mercy.

I don't recommend it.

I don't think that's a good idea. Even if the girl knows what AS is, and not to many do. I would feel very insecure if somebody would approach me this way.

Actually, it's not that bad. It works more than you think if you come across with confidence. Make the <this or that> social anxiety or nervousness. Not something you'd have to explain.

Just make sure that approach isn't the only thing you have. You need to have a good idea of what to do next after she says yes. lol

Never Frank, though I was known as Hotlips for many years




My favorite was "Would you hit me if I kissed you?"

Best response: "I guess you're just gonna have to find out the hard way."

BTW, that was not a walk-up-to-a-stranger line, so don't get yourself arrested...

Anyhow, there is such a thing as being a little too blunt. It tends to scare people away. They really like to take a little time, see if a new acquaintance is going to grow on them, before being pressed to make any kind of commitment, even for a single evening. Laying your cards on the table too soon is seen as an act of desperation, like you're a stalker just looking for a victim.

These types of situations are among the most difficult for Aspies to master, and unfortunately, the only way is trial and error and the errors often hurt - a lot No one way works for everyone, or on everyone. The approach that scores with one person will annoy the s**t out of another. You just have to relax and go with the flow, you'll begin to pick it up eventually and you'll find that the communication techniques that are natural for you will generally work best with people who think like you. Joe Cool Super-Jock pickup lines only work for superficial macho jerks, and they work best on shallow, vain women. Good for them, but I have no desire to run in those circles.

It depends from girl to girl. Some would like that, some would hate it, but I'm sure it would definitely work on one or two.

However, the key here is the confidence, and that includes if they reject you. If you reject you, just say thanks for their time or whatever, and walk away with your head held high like you didn't even break stride. Leaving that lasting impression on them makes rejection much easier to take.

It worked for me one out of two times, thus 50% success rate (not too bad).

Never worked for me. Plus i get lied to back, even though I'm always honest and straght forward. They are never honset back and like to crap all over me.

I would also say it depends on the girl. If she is already interested, but is afraid to ask you, then yes. If she is a cut-to-the-chase kinda girl, then yes.

Some women might think your kinda creepy, pushy, or full of yourself though, and they may roll their eyes, snicker, turn their nose up, or laugh at you.

I tend to agree with this. I think men as a whole are more direct than women, not that we CANNOT be direct...i am fairly direct when i have something to say, but for most women they do like a bit of a challenge a bit and might be taken aback by such a direct and bold statement.

HOWEVER i can't say ALL women would be turned off by this. You'd have to know the person and understand if this is how she is personality wise.

I think if the person is not very confrontational they would also be left feeling extremely uneasy in how to respond. I think i could handle that out of a person as i am not shy and speak what i think and feel for the most part but i think even I might be thinking 'how the heck do i respond to this"? even if i liked the guy i might be left wondering how to best reply and if i didn't like him in that way it would make for a very uncomfortable moment.

i'll never get tired of being frank, something is very brutal about it. but how can the truth be brutal? i thought the tuth always felt good

It seems like everytime I try to talk to a single woman, they run for the hills. I seem to always attract women that are married or have a boyfriend, and I think it's because I can relax and be myself. It's alot easier for me to be myself when I don't have to worry about impressing her, and unavailable women really respond.

It figures.

Look at it this way --

At your age (or really, any age from teens on through senior citizen age), most normal, well adjusted women are almost never single for any extended period of time. Most women go through one monogamous relationship after another, either short or long-term, including marriage. When one relationship dissolves, they tend to go into another one from a list of guys they know and trust -- including you.

If you attract women who are already with a BF or married, it's a good sign that you attract normal, well-adjusted women. Sooner or later, one of them will break up or get divorced. If so, you should be at the top or near the top of their list for the next person they move on to.

LOL - take a number and wait your turn...

Better than being left hanging.