i had to be harsh :b

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so... last we talked, she asked "when" we'd be "together" again. long-distance thing, see my other threads

anyway, i told her that we could MAYBE, the day when she completely changes, which will be never in worst case scenario, and in many years from now, best case scenario. i told her this. basically: leave me allone for at least many years.

the same day, she started to tell me she loves me and stuff, i ignored it.
next day came textmessages, kinda casual, and w a loving tone, like before. it messed so much with me, that when she got on msn another day later, i didnt even wanna talk to her. i dont wanna deal with her not getting through her head, that we're not THAT anymore.
she then sent me worried texts, she thought i was feeling bad, since i wasnt replying. i wrote her back that i was feeling great, i have a new practice job, im writing my novel, and im feeling fan-fucking-tastic, hoping she would take the hint.

no.
more loving texts continued to come in. again i ignored her online, again she asked me whats wrong, and just yesterday night i got even more happy loving texts. i finally texted her back that i dont reply, cus we're not "together" anymore, and therefore shes no longer a priority, and that all the lovingness is out of place and annoying.

i thought she would get it. no.

she wrote back where i "got off" texting her like that.

i wrote her an angry but honest text back, that she claims to have arrived scrambled. so i relaxed, and wrote her a new reply, stating that i dont love her, will not love her, and that i am offering a platonic friendship - and nothing else - ever.

i REALLY want to keep her as a friend, cus despite her bitchyness, we have some history, and a lot of it was good.
i dont want her to be dead to me.
but she keeps pushing, and pushing and pushing.
she keeps sending me loving little messages, that do NOTHING but get resentment out of me.
i went from wanting to chat w her, to wanting to block her (again).

what gets me the most is that if she had a LITTLE bit insight in herself, she would see what shes doing, and stop it before she ruins even the slightest chance at remaining friends. she doesnt.

I dont think you can be friends with her.

Best to just tell her not to contact you anymore.

I think it would be kinder, otherwise she will just keep trying to 'win you over'.

yeah... i keep hoping it wont come to that

I remember reading your other thread. Sorry, but I think it already has come to that.

There may have been nice moments, and she may have some good qualities, but I don't think she is good for you.

i left her a facebook message, since she keeps insisting that my texts arent coming through.
i let it be exceptionally harsh and honest. to the point.
i keep hoping she will accept a purely platonic friendship. yes im an idiot.
but im realistic too. if she ignores it, then theres nothing more i can do but to forget all about her.

it sucks when you dont have a lot of people in your life, to shut out the FEW who actually want to be in your life. you know

I know its hard and painful, but if you value her at all as a person, it is kinder to be 'harsh' that way she can get over it. It is more kind to her.

i know.. i tried "fading out", going quiet, but that only confused her. i sent a message, stating it quite bluntly: friendship or nothing, take it or leave it. ive blocked her before, in order to keep us both sane, and im prepared to do it again

Wow. I wish my ex were as fair as you. Now we're not talking for a month or 'never again' at his request. Maybe if I start being a total 'psycho hosebeast' I'll get more breaks. Wait, no, that takes looking good. Right. Back to the drawing board.

update, she still didnt get what was wrong, so i had to be very VERY blunt, and basically be a total as*hole. her last message to me was "f**k you" so i guess im doing it right :]

Well just hope she doesn't know where you live.

Wow, all those times she said she'd come out and didn't, it'd be hilarious if she did now. I'd laugh, and then cry for Zegh.

I don't think that being harsh is necessary to get rid of someone. You are fine and best judge of the situation. But if I was in a situation like this, I'd diplomatically, but clearly explain that I do not want to talk anymore, wish her all the best, and let her know that I will never reply to her and just ignore her from now on. And just not reply to anything she says. I would blame it as a relationship problem that both are guilty of which it always is.

I can't speak for him but I think he already tried that. This woman is basically histrionic from what I know, and distorted every which way to Sunday. Being diplomatic doesn't work, but totally ignoring her most likely would. Any attention at this point is still attention, and thus desirable.

only way to get rid of stalker is to 100% ignore them.

I wouldn't take sides till I hear her side of the story, what does prove me that you're the innocent victim while she's the evil b***h in all that?

I had to be harsh sounds like you are justifying something you think was not nice of you. "Like I had to hit her to teach her a lesson.."