Video of me teaching Seduction to Aspies

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Tom
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04 May 2009, 11:29 am

hope you like!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2q9cnkT8-z8[/youtube]



lotusblossom
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04 May 2009, 12:16 pm

Lovely video Tom!!

Looking extremely gorgeous and sexy!!



mechanima
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04 May 2009, 1:15 pm

Tom,

FORGET stage one...nobody would survive behaving like that around me, or any woman I know...unless we died laughing at him first... :lol:

Just keep still and quiet with those gorgeous big eyes fixed on the target until it is time to give excellent "stage two".

...and for HEAVEN'S SAKE don't make the classic Aspie-Guy mistake of NEVER getting round to stage three.
:D

M.



Tom
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04 May 2009, 1:29 pm

Thank you both

I do agree to an extent, but obviously it was shown in a nasty caricature in that vid. I think a little bit of fun and joking is ok though, as long as it is done with love.



nothingunusual
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04 May 2009, 2:59 pm

I can't speak for other female (ever... usually), but go easy on the alpha male dominance thing or risk facing the fury of the assertive modern woman. Some of us also like the nice guys. :lol:


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Orbyss
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04 May 2009, 3:34 pm

mechanima wrote:
Tom,

FORGET stage one...nobody would survive behaving like that around me, or any woman I know...unless we died laughing at him first...

Just keep still and quiet with those gorgeous big eyes fixed on the target until it is time to give excellent "stage two".


Hah, I agree with this. Honestly, I love videos like this because that's what I always want to see on this forum -- it gives a lot of insight into what's wrong and right, and I can tell you, Tom, if you go up to a girl and try to act these things out (well, stage one) it's not going to befit your deeper personality at all.

I can tell with someone like you, if you were to try stage one on me, I'd find it really funny and very possibly at least a bit off-putting. However, if you were to approach me, smile, and strike up some lively conversation when I started to talk back, that would get my attention very fast. Your physical features also don't immediately speak 'dominant male' at all, either, which would throw me off, personally.

A lot of it is about approaching the right woman; for example, not just the obviously visually attractive ones, the 'alpha females,' but those who have something about their personalities that just gets you. I don't think any AS guy is going to have a lot of good chances if he's only approaching obvious beautiful NT women in the first place.

Really, Aspie guys need to use what they have, honing and utilizing it to their advantage to find the woman that will be just as good for them as they can be for her. I like a guy who knows himself, likes himself, and can give the same in a relationship. It's pretty basic.



anna-banana
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04 May 2009, 3:50 pm

Tom, you're very cute...

but you're also very wrong... especially about the "stage one" thing. seriously, forget what you've been told. no girl is ever going to speak to you again if you tell her that her dress looks second-hand. damn!


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MissConstrue
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04 May 2009, 4:07 pm

I think I'm in love... :heart:

Ermm....I mean you're cute and that was a great video!

Still confused what nice guy exactly means on this form, but you seem like a nice guy in general which I find in most men highly attractive.


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Tom
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04 May 2009, 4:15 pm

if i said the 2nd hand dress thing as a joke, I know most cool women would laugh. It would be more entertaining than some dull compliment theyve heard 1000 times before.

Look, if some guy sees a bunch of AS women with NT partners online scolding a guy who tells it like it is, he aint gonna listen to the chicks. I'm the man to be listened to, not some chicks, because theyve never had to do it themselves (excluding my "sapphic sisters" of course!)



Tom
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04 May 2009, 4:17 pm

ugh, damn slow, unusable site!



Last edited by Tom on 04 May 2009, 4:38 pm, edited 2 times in total.

andyfalls
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04 May 2009, 4:18 pm

nothingunusual wrote:
I can't speak for other female (ever... usually), but go easy on the alpha male dominance thing or risk facing the fury of the assertive modern woman. Some of us also like the nice guys. :lol:


Do you know what the best thing about this thread is? There's an attractive aspie girl who lives in Belfast just like me! She's even the same age... maybe I should be more backhanded with that opening compliment? No, I'll just be myself 8)

Can someone tell me, what is the etiquette on a forum when you see somebody you might want to chat with a bit? Is it to forward to be forward?



Tom
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04 May 2009, 4:36 pm

Well if i was andyfalls i would try my best to let the person know that I liked them particularly for who they are and not just see them as a chance to have sex.



andyfalls
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04 May 2009, 4:52 pm

Well, thats not me. 8O You ideally want someone you can develop a real connection with over time, and I'm finding more and more I don't feel that with NT women I might sadly. That's an over-generalization. But I haven't met a female aspie in Belfast before, I'd like to but I haven't known where to look.

nothingunusual, I haven't met you, and I don't know you BUT if you like you can pm me and I'll write back. I'm Andrew, I'm 21, I'm a music student from Belfast. I like dark chocolate, Michel Gondry and jazz. :)



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04 May 2009, 5:38 pm

Oh and Tom, and I can't say I agree with your definition of 'alpha male'. Alpha males to me are quietly confident and charming not aggressive or rude. I think a true alpha would establish himself in a much more subtle way rather than behave like a jerk or a brute. Think cool, calm, and suave flattery without looking desperate, not chauvinistic or neanderthal-like! Sure, that might appeal to needy girls with low self-esteem, but I don't think that's the best thing.

Andy, no problem. Thank you for the compliment. The mention of Michel Gondry makes me want to go watch the video for Bjork's Human Behaviour. Which is my Asperger's anthem funny enough. 8)


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Haliphron
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04 May 2009, 5:49 pm

nothingunusual wrote:
I can't speak for other female (ever... usually), but go easy on the alpha male dominance thing or risk facing the fury of the assertive modern woman. Some of us also like the nice guys. :lol:



WTF makes you think that All, or even most "modern women" are assertive? Some of them are and some definitely ARENT.
The "art of seduction" is an ART, not a science. There's no one single formula for doing it correctly but there are LOTS of ways to do it badly. How you behave in stage one has a lot to do with reading the body language of the woman you're trying to approach. A suave NT man could pick up on whether she's the assertive type or if she's the more reserved type, AND if the cocky approach would work with the particular woman he spots in a public place. So-called "nice guys" seem to approach all women the very same way regardless of what messages she's sending or what she herself happens to like. I pretty much Never approach female strangers most of the time unless I somehow get the message that she's open to being approached and to talking with me.



andyfalls
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04 May 2009, 5:53 pm

My aspie anthem is 'My Friend' by Jimi Hendrix. Here is some guy singing it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BoLbRbB ... re=related

I like Bjork. I was doing a seminar on Icelandic Music a while back, so I got a few of her albums. Vespertine is a lot of fun. 8)