Page 1 of 1 [ 13 posts ] 

Souldragon
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 24
Location: Maryland

07 Oct 2008, 7:26 pm

I've been feeling alone for a while even though I have one good friend. I want to make more friends but I am too shy and have a hard time trying to find someone who shares my interests.

Anyone ever felt like that or are currently feeling like that? And how'd you over come it?



x_amount_of_words
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,359
Location: Spokane, Washington

07 Oct 2008, 7:55 pm

I felt that way for a long time. My situation was and still sometimes is similar to yours. I have one good friend but I'm not good at making new friends.

Medication for anxiety and depression have helped but other things have helped more. I've made friends online which has helped me the most. Making friends online is a lot easier than making them in person. I usually don't feel lonely now because of the internet.

I also try to spend more time with people in real life but I can only take so much of that.


_________________
theamazingjunkie.flavors.me


x_amount_of_words
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,359
Location: Spokane, Washington

07 Oct 2008, 7:58 pm

Also I've noticed that it's easier to make friends with people who also have AS. Maybe you can join a support group.


_________________
theamazingjunkie.flavors.me


SierraBell
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 422
Location: San Francisco

07 Oct 2008, 9:44 pm

I always feel lonely. However one of the ways I try to at least reduce it is talk with people online, but if I can't do that for some reason I'll try to talk to someone near by. It's a lot easier said then done though...socialzing for me takes A LOT of energy. :P

I probably didn't say anything helpful, but I just wanted to make connection with you and tell that you're not alone.



886
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jan 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,663
Location: SLC, Utah

07 Oct 2008, 9:48 pm

Yeah, I feel like that.

I don't try to make new friends, though, I just work my job and then stay inside all day, unless I'm golfing or at the gym. Nonetheless, both relatively anti-social activities.


_________________
If Jesus died for my sins, then I should sin as much as possible, so he didn't die for nothing.


asplanet
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Nov 2007
Age: 65
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,258
Location: Cyberspace, New Zealand

07 Oct 2008, 9:53 pm

SierraBell wrote:
.socialzing for me takes A LOT of energy.

I agree, I can only handle so much, I often feel I want more friends, but then get over whelmed, like them on my terms, in others words "can put them away and bring them out when please to" of course this does not work.

I often wondered what it was that leaves me feeling so lonely at times "the empty void" but with me have found my extremity of moods cause this and if I focus on things that I enjoy during these times, I can be very creative and happy in my own way.

Often expectations of others makes me feel alone, when what I think I want is not quite the case, as what the average person enjoys will never make me happy anyway.

I feel apart of the problem is that many of us grow up not knowing or understanding our true selves, until we do and know how to meet our own needs, we unintentionally try and fulfill that gap with what we perceive will make us happy, and often get it so wrong...

True identity, understanding oneself and acceptance makes heaps of difference.... but having a connection with real people is vital for me and I have found this on line, as I have more control over when :wink:


_________________
Face Book "Alyson Fiona Bradley "


Zane
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 12 Apr 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 347
Location: Tempe, Arizona

07 Oct 2008, 10:35 pm

I first got used to the feeling.

Then i learned to really appreciate the times when i did not have "that" feeling.

And then i learned that it comes and it goes like a river it always flows.

also i began branching out into new scenes such as the Hip hop scene, the bar scene, the sports scene, the coffee shop scene, and eventually as soon as i moved out of the house and began my own life i slowly made more friends and associates...

then before i knew it all i had to do was go up to people and chat ...

it's all about balance. that and pets. i talked to my dog a lot and took him for walks.

oh and from personal experience try not to drink/toke alone that can become a very addictive escape ... as in it took me quite a few months and pay checks to figure that out :roll:


_________________
"The world is dying; time to suit up"


mikebw
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Sep 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,283
Location: Florida

08 Oct 2008, 1:42 am

I've felt like that. It's not a feeling that stays with me very long though. If it's bothering me I rationalize things and it usually goes running for cover, it then waits a few months before sticking its ugly little head out again. I'm one of the lucky ones that doesn't feel lonely very often. I've almost always preferred being alone.


_________________
The world under heaven, after a long period of division, tends to unite; after a long period of union, tends to divide. This has been so since antiquity.

http://www.imdb.com/user/ur3140151/ratings = My Movie Vote History


Souldragon
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 24
Location: Maryland

09 Oct 2008, 7:58 pm

It's amazing to find that some of you feel the same about using the interent to talk to people insetad of actually meeting them. I totally agree with the part about wasting so much energy trying to make friends. I AM trying to join a group i just heard about with people who has aspergers too. Any advice?



GodsWonder
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 26 May 2008
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 91

12 Oct 2008, 9:01 pm

Be happy that you have one friend, I wish I did but nobody seems to like me. I just want one frekin' friend and I would be content. I am feeling really lonely but soon I am just planning on giving up on trying to make friends because to me it seems impossible.



Synth
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 3 Oct 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 329

12 Oct 2008, 9:09 pm

I just accept the fact that I probably won't be able to keep one, don't take my advice though..



Souldragon
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 24
Location: Maryland

15 Oct 2008, 7:18 pm

I'm thankful for the one friend I have. Don't give up so easily and don't lose faith.



Social_Fantom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,907
Location: Trapped outside of the space time continuum

15 Oct 2008, 10:48 pm

I stay lonely most of the time. But honestly, I have no interest in the people around me at college. I require more maturity in a person than what most of the people in college today have. Not that I don't like people that are in touch with their inner child or like to have fun, I just prefer the company of those who are at least mature enough to have some kind of meaningful intelligent conversation with.

I try to get out and do things to help overcome my loneliness like going for a walk. :)


_________________
So simple, it's complicated