Do you ever feel genuinely hated?

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Yes. I just get the feeling that people get some sort of vibe from me that makes them not like me. As I continue having no friends this feeling gets stronger.

In my experience, I have a group of friends, then there's this one friend, of the friends, who despises me w/o even knowing who I am. Then this person seems to focus on every "weird" thing I might do, and points it out to the others. Then hell breaks loose, b/c now these friends are noticing the "weird" things about me...nothing is ever the same

I went to a restaurant today, and can pinpoint the exact moment when my waitress became disgusted by me, via a facial expression, then her disappearing completely after then (not even bringing out the bill).

What did I do? I have no idea. She asked if I wanted a refill of water. I said 'sure', then she freaked. It certainly wasn't anything I said, so I must have violated some social norm in body language, though I still don't know what it was.

People decide to hate me too often for me to worry about what some random stranger thinks of me.


On the plus side, her disappearing after that did make the meal cost less, since it gave me an excuse to not tip. Kind of a jerk move on my part, but I had been waiting around for 10 minutes after finishing eating, and she never brought the bill, despite walking by my table when serving another. I ended up having to ask someone else to ring up the meal.

Yeah when I was in 6th and 7th grade. I was the only girl in the class and all the boys in there didn't like me there.

I was very hated.

They called me insane racist.

I was very proud because I was hated. Started to identify with Hitler and Stalin and see myself as evil.

'I am not a gold coin, for everyone to like me.'


I've had that out-of-the-blue hatred many times, sometimes in circumstances in which there had been little opportunity for me to offend them even non-verbally, and certainly no concrete action on my part at which they could have taken offence. So it's not something specific I did or said, they just perceive something about me that arouses irrational hatred*. I try and remind myself of two quotes from William Blake:

'Always be ready to speak your mind, and a base man will avoid you.'
'Listen to the fool's reproach! It is a kingly title.'


*I know this to be a fact. To quote a conversation I had some time ago:

me: What did I do to you?
her: You were born.

More recently, a plain spoken NT friend got drunk enough to tell me, regarding rejection by others: 'It's not anything you do or say, people just don't like you.'

I dunno about myself being hated nowadays, but I do know that I was pretty much one of the most unpopular kids throughout elementary school, middle school, and my first year of high school. And I will say this - partly because of my experiences within school & society, I have come to genuinely hate the vast majority of all people (not counting my family & friends).

I find the whole lot of them to be incredibly shallow, immature, stupid, judgmental, ignorant, arrogant mindless sheep who only know how to follow the rest of the brainwashed herd. Honestly, I choose not to associate with other people when I don't have to, because putting up with their bulllshit is very annoying & tiring.

Most people in general have presented absolutely no reasons at all for me to care what they think of me, or even for me to give them the time of day. They have mostly shown me no kindness or courtesy, and so I will not show them any.

I feel hated a lot. I feel like I can't trust anyone...

Yes. My next door neighbors moved out, and a new couple moved in. The female of the couple always pointedly ignores me, and the one time I greeted her, gave a rude and sarcastic answer. The male will sometimes say, "How's it going?" Which stymies me, because I don't know to what he is referring. A friend pointed out that it might be because they are a bi racial couple, and I am perceived to be a threat.

that was A FRIEND? man, that's the kinda stuff that can put you in counselling.

He didn't say he didn't like me, just most others. Though NT, if you ask him something, he will tell you what he thinks without sweetening the pill or anything, even more so with alcohol (it's not called truth serum for nothing). Actually, it didn't shock me, as it was what I thought already.

I can't believe how much of the things I read at WP are so... me.

Yes. I get this.

"Loathed" is the word I prefer, like, hated is too intimate... like you would have a REASON to hate someone, this is just primal avoidance/disgust.

I personally relate it to the reaction obese people get... to be honest and fair, despite the embarrassment, the reaction I have to overweight people. I try to relate everything I can to animal sociology (which I actually understand, much unlike my own species); in this case, it always makes me think of herds of herbivores pushing the young to the center, and the sick and old to the edges...

I don't like being on the outside of the herd.

The most inexplicable part to me is that it is internally generated... I KNOW it is, I've lived it... an ex-girlfriend, who despite really not liking me very much, responded to my social disfunction by teaching me how to be a clone of her people. You get a well cut suit and a haircut, a girl who gets plenty of attention and chooses to hold your arm, get a couple of positive comments on your tie by people who made more money this morning than you did last month, and a little chemical help with your social anxiety... and... it just goes away.

Confidence is a disturbingly powerful agent in society.

Turns out I'm not snooty real estate elitist material... so I never felt "right" trying to be that person, but I didn't feel loathed. Eventually I abandoned that entirely. I'm still trying to find the place where I can maintain my own sense of self, AND maintain a reasonable level of confidence.

...of course, it could just be that everyone knows how Awesome I am, and their just jealous.