Facebook - any point for me?
My life isn't too bad at all, just not something all that interesting. I'm also somewhat private, and don't like to share alot about myself. I really wouldn't have anything to talk about.
I'm not against people using the site. I look at life simply as "to each their own."
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PrisonerSix
"I am not a number, I am a free man!"
I use it for networking and such. I'd love to get to know some fellow autistic people, so if you'd like to exhange some mails or chat through that medium, feel free to PM me and I'll add you.
About showing up with 0 friends, is that not what everybody does after signing up? One friend has to be the first, right?
You can control what information you add yourself, its what others might add that can be potentially threatening.
I think I haven't done anything with it because... I'm afraid of it. Why?
-people looking at what you're doing in your life (or not doing)
-I don't really have any friends (that I would use that word anyway... a few acquaintances). WhilstI 'd love to have some friends, showing up on facebook with none is a pretty good sign of being a loser, just like in real life, right? Like how you point out you are looking for friends and get bumped out because you don't have any so a clearly a failure.
-I don't really do anything with my life. If I'm not at work I'm either doing my exercise/fitness work, playing on XboxLive or just contemplating nothing, watching my life waste away.
-I don't really like the past, and want no attachment to it, practical or not. I do not want to be 'found' by people I once knew, nor do I want them seeing my (no) friends quota or what I am doing in life.
-I hate myself physically and utterly detest photos... I hear those are pretty mandatory.
Are my fears justified? All I want is to meet new people who like the (few, shallow) things I do, who can show me new things, or just make my life a little bit worthwhile. Can facebook do that?
Help me please, I'm running out of ways to save my life. < /melodrama>
wow, I have similuar thougths as you concerning Facebook. Im a "privacy freak" as someone called it here and Im mostly affraid of exposing myself so naked as Facebook seemes to be. I mean here I havent really written so much but for me I have said much much more private stuff on this forum than I have to anyone else except my family IRL!! And thats because of anonymity. On facebook it seemes to be mandatory to have your real and full name - NOT nicknames!! That scares me most. Once I opened a facebook account in my cats name just to see what its all about... and now by a pure coincidence, my DAD sended me an SMS saying "I have facebook, you can add me there!
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hi
I think I haven't done anything with it because... I'm afraid of it. Why?
-people looking at what you're doing in your life (or not doing)
-I don't really have any friends (that I would use that word anyway... a few acquaintances). WhilstI 'd love to have some friends, showing up on facebook with none is a pretty good sign of being a loser, just like in real life, right? Like how you point out you are looking for friends and get bumped out because you don't have any so a clearly a failure.
-I don't really do anything with my life. If I'm not at work I'm either doing my exercise/fitness work, playing on XboxLive or just contemplating nothing, watching my life waste away.
-I don't really like the past, and want no attachment to it, practical or not. I do not want to be 'found' by people I once knew, nor do I want them seeing my (no) friends quota or what I am doing in life.
-I hate myself physically and utterly detest photos... I hear those are pretty mandatory.
Are my fears justified? All I want is to meet new people who like the (few, shallow) things I do, who can show me new things, or just make my life a little bit worthwhile. Can facebook do that?
Help me please, I'm running out of ways to save my life. < /melodrama>
Facebook has lots of groups for all kind of things, including exercise/fitness and XboxLive (as well as AS). You can meet and "friend" people there who share your interests. You can let them see your profile and pictures or not, as you choose. You don't have to have a picture of yourself if you don't want to. You don't have to add any info to your profile. You don't have to use your real name. All that is required is a valid email account, which you don't have to share with anyone, just the website.
Sounds like a win-win situation... what have you got to lose?
Ed,
Thing is, it is my legit name on the membership, and it/they said that you can't change it to anything other than your actual name (shortening first name, I guess). Is that true or do they just never enforce it? I'd rather shorten it to First Name First Surname Letter if I could, but I thought it was against the rules </as paranoia>
Thing is, it is my legit name on the membership, and it/they said that you can't change it to anything other than your actual name (shortening first name, I guess). Is that true or do they just never enforce it? I'd rather shorten it to First Name First Surname Letter if I could, but I thought it was against the rules </as paranoia>
yeah I also discovered this now. After this thread and my dads sms I got to spend some time on Facebook today. I wanted also to change the name (of my cat) to appear diffrent... but Im way more paranoia than you...I felt like if Im comitting a crime by stating my cats name in the first place...and thought they will be really pissed off....
Another thing I discovered is that I can basically enter with my cats name and add friends there when telling by private PM its me behind it - then I dont have to state my real name...BUT I also discovered its open public and free to browse friends of a profile even if you cant see the profile itself (as it needs approval).
If there was a option to disable anyone - inclusive friends and friends of friends - to see my friends list (or lack of it beeing long) I would hesitate way less to really activate the account.
Im zzzzzzzzleepy now so sorry for beeing blurred........
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hi
If you're looking to find a social networking website to make new friends, then take a look at couchsurfing.com. It's a hospitality website aimed at travellers. If you like to travel, it's a great way to meet people. But even if you don't, most cities have some sort of a local CS community, organising all sorts of social events for locals and people passing through. I've been to quite a few of them over the years and the people are almost all very friendly and curious. A lot of them a looking to meet new friends in their city, whether they've just moved there alone or lived there all their lives. It seems to attract a lot of AS types as well.
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Ara, what do I care for me goose feathered bed?
What do I care for blankets?
Tonight I lie in a wide open field,
in the arms of me raggle taggle gypsy-o
I totally understand the issues you have with facebook.
I have, however, reconnected with some friends from my teens. This reconnection has been very fruitful.
As for updates on exiting lives. Most of these people don't have very exiting lives. It's just pictures of their kids and stuff. My favorite updates are quotes that a person puts in his 'status' or whatever.
There is, however, an overwhelming amount of very, very, normal people on facebook.
SilverPikmin
Deinonychus
Joined: 1 Aug 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 360
Location: Merseyside, England, UK
Man, am I clueless on social networking. You'd think I'd 'get' the online kind.
I think that's referring to comments. I'm not sure, never used it myself, but most sites of the sort let people add comments these days. You can probably disable them if you want though.
greenturtle74
Velociraptor
Joined: 4 May 2009
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 495
Location: Greater Philadelphia
I have to say, as a socially isolated person, Facebook has been one of the best things I’ve done for myself. I joined almost a year ago not expecting much. Really, I just did it to set up a Page for my employer, and I planned to just have a “skeleton profile” with no personal info. In real life, I considered myself a “loser” with no friends and “boring” interests – and I certainly didn’t want anyone seeing that zero.
Then, right after I joined, someone from work added me as a friend. Someone I was friendly with, if not a close friend. But that was the coolest thing. I was like, wow, I have ONE! So I slowly started looking around, and I found siblings and long lost cousins – who I wasn’t close with but I added them. Then, more people from work, people I used to work with, people I went to school with 20 years ago. I started updating my status more often and adding more about my interests. Today I have 35 friends, which is more than I expected. I’m actually very selective – I won’t add anyone I’m not comfortable with, and we have to exchange at least one message back and forth. And all my privacy settings are set to “Only Friends.”
Is a Facebook friend a real friend? No. Some of them never write back again after the first time. Sometimes, everyone ignores me, and that sucks. But it’s something. Other people, I feel I have gotten closer to. When I get a comment on my status, that’s cool. Being the creative type I love the status update – I put a lot of thought into it and have fun with it. I’ve also used Notes to share some longer pieces and people have really liked that. It’s a side of me they’ve never seen.
I think of Facebook as leveling the playing field for people like me. In real life, I’m the awkward, quiet one who gets left out in conversation. On Facebook, my interactions are meaningful, while all the extroverted people are going on about stupid shallow stuff like how tired or hung over they are. I would say Facebook has a way of showing you who you really are, and who your friends really are. In my case, it’s been sometimes exhilarating, sometimes frustrating, but definitely worthwhile. I do have friends, I do have interests, and I like me a whole lot more!
I only joined Facebook on first May because I had to do something there related to my work AND because of peer pressure.
I realized later that Facebook is only fun for the social people and those who have an active social life (parties,friends, group hanging out , girlfriend ,engagements...etc).
A facebook profile is a projection of one's social life.
Since first may I only got 3 wall comments, 1 from an old colleague, 1 from an uncle and the third from a coworker.
Looking at others' profiles made me realize how socially behind and how socially different/distant (and that's not something good) I am compared to people of my age.
Joining Facebook was a mistake, I was happier without it.
princesseli
Veteran
Joined: 7 Jan 2008
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 512
Location: Honolulu HI/ Los Angeles CA
Most facebook "friends" arent actually real friends. You can be friends with someone on facebook who you dont even know though I wouldnt recogmend it. If your friends with someone on facebook, you dont have to be friends with them in real life you can just be acquintances or just people you recognize through school or other activities.
A lot of people dont really either. People that make constant status updates are often not updating on something particularly eventful in their life, just whatevers on their mind or that small thing their doing. And for those who have like hundreds of pics up: they're are some people who love taking pics of themselves for everything which I find kinda ridiculous.
You dont have to put pics of yourself up their. But if you do know people that have pics of you that might be a problem. Like someone else said, you can untag yourself. But if you dont hang around people that constantly have a camera out, I dont think that should be much of a problem. Like if you know someone who takes plently if pics and loves to put them on facebook just tell them that you dont want pics of you on facebook.
I used thing facebook was pointless because I had no life but I found it useful for event invitations
I think I haven't done anything with it because... I'm afraid of it. Why?
-people looking at what you're doing in your life (or not doing)
-I don't really have any friends (that I would use that word anyway... a few acquaintances). WhilstI 'd love to have some friends, showing up on facebook with none is a pretty good sign of being a loser, just like in real life, right? Like how you point out you are looking for friends and get bumped out because you don't have any so a clearly a failure.
-I don't really do anything with my life. If I'm not at work I'm either doing my exercise/fitness work, playing on XboxLive or just contemplating nothing, watching my life waste away.
-I don't really like the past, and want no attachment to it, practical or not. I do not want to be 'found' by people I once knew, nor do I want them seeing my (no) friends quota or what I am doing in life.
-I hate myself physically and utterly detest photos... I hear those are pretty mandatory.
Are my fears justified? All I want is to meet new people who like the (few, shallow) things I do, who can show me new things, or just make my life a little bit worthwhile. Can facebook do that?
Help me please, I'm running out of ways to save my life. < /melodrama>
I'm in the same boat you are. I made one just because it makes it easier to keep in touch with one friend who moved away. If we're both on Facebook at the same time, we can chat. Normally, I'd use MSN Messenger, but we don't have that on our work computers. I don't have any pics or anything because I don't have any recent pics.