Why do Aspies not care about out appearance?

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MathGirl
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28 May 2009, 9:09 pm

I guess it's because sometimes I get really absorbed in things and forget all about my appearance.
I dress clean and plain, usually just pants and a dark t-shirt. I have a bit of an Einstein's closet, because I tend to buy a lot of shirts of the same color. I shower regularly though... I can't go without showering for more than 3 days.
My clothes don't reflect me much, but who cares. I don't want to draw any extra attention to myself.


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886
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28 May 2009, 9:27 pm

I couldn't careless, really.

The only clothes I own are hoodies and jeans, really. I mean I shower everyday, I care about hygeine and s**t, but that's about it.


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Amajanshi
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29 May 2009, 1:45 am

I think Aspies don't care about outer appearance (fashion) coz it's quite superficial, and to keep up with fashion etc is just an attempt to fit in with others which will ultimately be insufficient if other issues (especially social skills and sense of humour) aren't tackled alongside too.

For me, I have a shower every day, but I only change my "outdoor" clothes once a week, and that's only coz it's becoming dirty and needs to go into the laundry. I wouldn't mind wearing the same shirt, jacket and pants for a whole season if it never got dirty/dusty. I have more important things to care about that how fashionable I look in front of others. I don't like trying to please people especially when they seem to be so much better off than me. It feels fake. I try to do what I feel like/enjoy, and not just coz other people like it/do it.

However if there's a piece of contemporary fashion or a hairstyle etc which I want to wear/try, it's coz I genuinely like it/interested in it, and not simply coz it's popular among other people.



protest_the_hero
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29 May 2009, 3:49 pm

I can be somewhat selfconcious at times, if I think I look terrible for some reason. It's nothing of major concern for me most of the time though.



WardenWolf
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29 May 2009, 10:08 pm

I tend to dress well when I go out, and comb my hair well. Although I frequently forget to clip my fingernails until they get way too long, and other little things. I think the main thing is, aspies are so frequently overwhelmed with all other things in their lives that appearance can take a back seat. Also, regarding hair, many people (including myself occasionally) will run their fingers through their hair or rub their head when stressed, so even if it did look nice when they started the day, it may not look good 2 hours into it. I had to sort of train myself not to do that; it looks bad enough by the end of the day without me tearing it up.


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Hovis
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04 Jun 2009, 4:27 pm

I wash a lot. I like to be as clean as I can. But I don't wear makeup, or style my hair, and I just dress very simply and plainly in clothes I feel comfortable in.

The only times I've been interested in clothes is when the style was part of a current obsession I had. When I was no longer obsessed, it disappeared. I had no interest in the style or fashion in itself, only in wanting to live the obsession.



DarthPaul
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05 Jun 2009, 12:17 am

I'm not extremely self-conscious, but then again, maybe that's a problem. One of my friends, who also has AS, comments on society's fixation on appearance a lot. My friends tell me quite often that "girls don't dig guys with long hair", and "this whole heavy metal thing you got going on is just a turn-off". To be quite honest, I dont feel that the whole black t-shirt and jeans look completely suits me, but I find it to be comfortable. I really don't know what sort of fashion style really would suit me, but maybe I am sick of wearing the same stuff over and over. Usually, I'm more likely to shower and shave if I'm going out in public, or if I haven't done so in a few days. To be quite honest, I'm not really all that confident in my appearance, but I'm comfortable with it.



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05 Jun 2009, 5:03 am

Spokane_Girl wrote:
Wouldn't that be executive dysfunction?


And it says in the criteria they don't lack self help skills but lot of aspies don't take very good care of themselves. That isn't very good self help skills. The DSM criteria is crap I'd say.


Yes, many Aspies may not have good self-help skills. One thing to consider is when they diagnose a disorder they don't say you need symptoms, but rather symptoms that are at a clinical level. When people go to med school, they start thinking they have all these medical disorders, when they really don't. Likewise, many psychology students think the same thing in abnormal psychology, when they think about roommates. Everyone has symptoms, but it being at the clinical level (or significantly interfering enough with others/self) is what distinguishes a disorder from just "symptoms".



activebutodd
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05 Jun 2009, 5:51 am

I am much better with it now that I'm older. Mainly through peer pressure with the appearance, though I hate feeling dirty and so I wash a lot.
It's so hard to navigate all the stupid little fashion and clothing rules, and people tend to form judgements or at least ideas about you by your looks. So yes, I've kinda been made to care! :(



robbokris
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05 Jun 2009, 5:21 pm

I like to wash daily and wear clean clothes a lot, but if I'm not going out and just laying around my house for a few days then I won't bother showering or changing clothes because I don't need to.



outlander
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06 Jun 2009, 7:15 pm

Many years ago, when I was dating the girl who became my wife, we had a summer afternoon date and it was a bit warm so I went up to my room and changed into a pair of shorts and a short sleeved shirt.

When I came back down, she took one look at me and said;" You CAN"T go like THAT ! !!".

Utterly taken aback, I asked in all innocence, "Why not? Its all clean?"

Her reply was, "You are wearing two different plaids !".

A.
I guess that was fair warning to her that I was different
B.
I let her do all my clothing shopping (and am happy to have it so for the last 43 years).
C.
She reminds, and then pesters me when I need a haircut (which she does for me).
D.
She is a bit perplexed at how bad my shoes get to looking in everyday wear without me noticing. And she usually ends up polishing them for me because it is more value to her than me. But she is appalled that I will wear shoes until they have holes in the soles and are falling apart.
E.
She is tolerant that I do not shave at all, but I do trim the beard every time she cuts my hair
F.
She often has to suggest that I should not wear my beat up work shoes and pants I have been painting in, even when I am going to the store to buy more building material or paint.
G.
I always wear a key ring on my belt to keep from tearing holes in my pants pockets. (I cannot get organized enough to remember to take keys appropriate to my activities, so I just take all of them all the time)
H.
I can get dressed up for occasions but basically have only a limited "dress up" wardrobe and I have to let her give me a "color check" before going anywhere. Most of this wardrobe is of colors that would be hard to mismatch too badly.

I guess I put little stock in appearance and can't identify with the opinions of those who do.

I think I got a good deal when I married her.


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Pinklollipop
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06 Jun 2009, 11:36 pm

I still care about my appearance, though I guess it's influence from others because just a few years ago I didn't care at all until relatives said that I need to dress better and I myself wanted to blend in with others my age.



oddballdeviant
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07 Jun 2009, 11:17 pm

Emotional and creative expression for me is very limited, so one way I do it is through fashion(also i'm incredibly vain,) and what you wear is accentuated by your personal hygeiene, so I try to keep everything well maintained... at the same time there are times where I couldn't care less and will go months without getting my hair cut/maintained and will wear the same jeans 3 days in a row... but those times are becoming few and far between now.



pensieve
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08 Jun 2009, 4:31 am

Caring about my appearance is a lot of work, so I've toned it down a bit. Although I look ok today than I have for the last couple of weeks - minus the dog hair on my jacket.
I wish I didn't care what other people though of my appearance. I remember being 8 years old and wearing all grey when I went into a shopping centre.
I think autistics don't care about their appearance because they're not sheeple - have you ever noticed how groups of friends all dress similar? I see it all the time and have been guilty as such.


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