Hope someone can help with my problem
Well I have fantastic news! Today, me and my ex-friend hung out together for the first time since the end of October! We went out with a mutual friend to play pool, and had a blast. It was a bit tense, but things loosened up quite a bit by the time the night was over! So, I'm extremely happy that things are being repaired! Looks like I might have another friend after all!
Lonelyand blue: some advice;
Leaen from your earlier mistakes and don't push for intimacy again.
Does she know you have AS? if not, could you tell her? If so, you might be able to explain to her just why you reacted as you did and maybe there's a chance she'll understand so that if another situation arises, she might stop to wonder if she's misinterpreting your actions rather than attribute something to you (E.G stalking) that you're not doing.
Secondly, your "friend" who lied to her about you. A well known saying goes "with friends like this you don't need enemies." This "friend" makes me think of this.
If i were you, I would tell him straight that you found out that he lied to her, making a bad situation worse, and that you don't want to associate with them anymore as they were obviously more concerned abot their own ass than about you.
Julie
Dear lonely and blue,
My son went through almost the exact same thing when he broke up with a girl. He was 15 yr old at the time. He continued to e-mail her and waited at her school, and talked to her mom, wrote her letters. I tried very hard to explain to him that this was inappropriate, but he didn't seem able to help himself. It took him months to get over the acute phase of this misery. I don't think he has fully recovered yet, and it has been over a year.
The fact that this friendship was with a girl is at the root of your problem. She is not interested in maintaining a relationship with you at this time. She feels threatened because you won't let go. You are scaring her. Many young women are abused or even murdered by young men who act as my son did. One in 4 women who is murdered is killed by a boyfriend or husband.
If you are looking for friendship, seek out other guys. Date girls. There is a big difference. And if a girl breaks up with you, let it go. There will always be another girl.
Another important point. Don't limit your friendships to 1 other person at a time. That is too intense for anybody to handle. You won't be able to maintain a friendship like that because you will be too dependent and needy. Join a club, take a class, do some volunteer work. Put yourself in situations where you will interact with other people. That way you won't be alone when your friend isn't available.
pink
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