Having A Hard Time With People Online...

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RedMage
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13 Nov 2006, 1:07 am

I've been having a hard time with people online lately, and I think everyone hates me now. I was talking to someone before on MSN, but he wouldn't even say a thing. I feel so bad now... No one will talk to me, and I feel unwanted by all... :cry:

What am I to do about it?



hale_bopp
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13 Nov 2006, 1:44 am

I don't know, it's been happening to me since I first used a chatroom at 14.

You try not to take things personally, but when you find out it is personal... it really hurts.



fresco
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13 Nov 2006, 6:16 am

I think its very easy for people to misconstrue things in chatrooms, its like text messaging its quite ambiguous, the reader can project a different tone to a remark or just put a spin on a harmless comment. I've just found the WP chatroom and I've already peed a few off unintentionally. Don't worry find a new chatroom and take what people say with a pinch of salt, hard I know but its words on a screen from an anonymous person.



Nemoralis
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13 Nov 2006, 11:27 am

Are these people you know in person or people you are just talking to randomly online? Usually its easier to talk to someone you know online rather than someone you don't know in person, because then you typically know how they'll take things and how far you can push it or what you can say.

As far as talking to random people, you just have to re-read what you are about to say before you press enter. Thing about it from their perspective, how will it come across to them? Sometimes add the winking smiley or whatever even when you think it's obvious you're joking.



larsenjw92286
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13 Nov 2006, 3:01 pm

I have some of those problems as well!


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mcewen
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13 Nov 2006, 3:39 pm

I wouldn't worry overly about it. New people like me are having a hard enough time working out the practicalities of communicating, let alone the content. They probably didn't mean what they wrote, and if there is silence, they probably couldn't find their way back! Someone give me a map and a handbook / user manual.
Drop over and share a cup of coffee with me, it may even cheer you up.
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Mikka
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13 Nov 2006, 5:04 pm

RedMage wrote:
I've been having a hard time with people online lately, and I think everyone hates me now. I was talking to someone before on MSN, but he wouldn't even say a thing. I feel so bad now... No one will talk to me, and I feel unwanted by all... :cry:

What am I to do about it?


There are many factors that could have been involved. I've accidentally left my messenger programs online and fell asleep. I've had internet problems that have dropped my connection without allowing me to say good bye to people, and that's caused them to be upset with me.

The only thing you can do is try again at some point in the very near future and if you get an explanation, next time you'll know to wait to see if there is anything to get upset about before getting upset.



Jamie06
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14 Nov 2006, 7:27 pm

RedMage wrote:
I've been having a hard time with people online lately, and I think everyone hates me now. I was talking to someone before on MSN, but he wouldn't even say a thing. I feel so bad now... No one will talk to me, and I feel unwanted by all... :cry:

What am I to do about it?


I've had those sorta problems before, just try and take your mind of it, that's what I try and do although it don't always work.



RedMage
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14 Nov 2006, 7:29 pm

I was talking about people on forums, especially a certain Zelda one. :(



Mitch8817
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15 Nov 2006, 2:01 am

Don't worry about it, you're more than welcome here and I can assure you that you won't be ignored. Hope you enjoy your stay, this place is a safe place :D



RedMage
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15 Nov 2006, 7:09 pm

At least I know there's forum I can feel safe at!



larsenjw92286
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15 Nov 2006, 7:20 pm

Of course!


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diseased
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15 Nov 2006, 9:40 pm

fresco wrote:
I think its very easy for people to misconstrue things in chatrooms, its like text messaging its quite ambiguous, the reader can project a different tone to a remark or just put a spin on a harmless comment.


Amen, brutha.... been there, had that done many times.



spacecadetaspie
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19 Nov 2006, 3:57 pm

Unless U met them F2F in Real Life, I dont trust online chatting.

1. Profiles can be Faked
2. Photos can be Faked.
3. Bios faked.

You could be rapping to one your age or someone "pretending" to be younger.

Me Im who Iam Online.
I dont Play Games.

Thus my profile on Myspace stands.

But I can change that for a Better site???

Beware Dating sites Paid.

NOT Real or IF Real, I never made a connection.

IE No one my age 35-50.

Hope this Helps ALL.

Try Dating4Disabled.com

Leery of other sites for Matchmaking & Profiling.



JosephK
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22 Nov 2006, 3:58 am

RedMage wrote:
I've been having a hard time with people online lately, and I think everyone hates me now. I was talking to someone before on MSN, but he wouldn't even say a thing. I feel so bad now... No one will talk to me, and I feel unwanted by all... :cry:

What am I to do about it?


I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one. I think the internet and internet culture is a double-edged sword. It's great to have so much information available at the click of a mouse, but if you don't know how to fit into the inane "culture" around it, you'll find yourself the subject of ridicule and misunderstanding. I, for instance, refuse to use any kind of internet 'jargon' ("lol", using letters to abbreviate, etc.). I hate internet culture and even posting here feel as if whatever I say is constantly under scrutiny--ripe for mocking. The fact is, a lot of people online are just as*holes. I know what it's like to feel universally disliked or disregarded, and for people who have trouble picking up on and issuing social cues in real life, it just stands to reason it'll be twice as hard in a deaf and blind environment like the internet.



SolaCatella
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22 Nov 2006, 7:14 am

spacecadetaspie wrote:
Unless U met them F2F in Real Life, I dont trust online chatting.


...Hence your presence here. :lol: Seriously, Wrongplanet's as safe--or not--as any other online forum.

Try not to take what is said on Internet posts seriously, or if you find yourself being endlessly ridiculed or feeling bad, try finding a forum with a more relaxed, "friendly" culture. Different sites and forums have different tolerances for argument and "nastiness," generally correlating to the average snarkiness of the common posters there. Personally, I post on a variety of forum cultures; there are some, like Wrongplanet, where I tone down my general snappishness when I'm annoyed, and a few others where I can be as scathing as I like--and one I post on makes Wrongplanet look nearly aggressive! Just find one with a culture and a favored topic that suits you. It can take some wandering, but eventually you'll find a place--or places--you like.


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