Social skills in Job

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my job is getting ahead of me. Solving one problem three new are coming up. Being the one who has to be the communication bridge between the company's branch site Product Operations and the IT departments overseas is harder than I ever thought it could be. Migration from three different old software up to a better software, the old ones all packed together into one latest version eats up IT resources more than the IT manager thought of. Customers are stepping back from us endangering the contracts by misstrust of our capability dealing with the jobs.

I have to translate IT issues from German into English and know my way around the technical stuff insideout communicating with the IT is hard because of my low social skills. The harder it gets, the more problems the IT puts upon us, the more trouble I have to keep my inner emotions out of how I communicate. So I come over being rude, because just too many tickets, too many IT tasks did not get enough attention, too many IT jobs did not get finished clean and functional operational, so I could crawl out of my skin! I already got told to keep to pure facts and technical stuff and not to be emotional in any way they have enough pressure already. Well me too! We have to keep SLAs and keep our customers happy, but the IT does not do enough to hit that common goal. How to keep still and unemotional? How to check my choise of how I phrase my communication all the time when people around me constantly informing me what alls is failing? This way I cannot do this bridging of communication between us and the IT departments any longer, it drive me into a next major bunrout!

Any tipps and ideas?

Before my diagnosis my social difficulties were as appareant as they are now. What has changed is my attitude towards them. It was painfull not to be able to make friends among my colleagues and see how well they seemed to get along. And I blamed myself for failing. After the AS diagnosis I felt relieved and many things were explained. I told my colleagues about the diagnosis from the beginning and it was imperative that they understood the implications on our working together. It was recieved with some reservations but I gradually won them over. In the beginning I identified myself with the diagnosis but eventually it changed to that I was a person with AS. And it also changed the relations at work. We talked less and less about my diagnosis and more about everyday things. I had a colleague who for a period functioned as a mentor. We talked through my workplan for the day every morning to give me an overwiew and make things predictable. The past 6 months or so I have become more able to work independently.
It has helped me to be open about my diagnosis and moods and I have never been turned down if I expressed needing support. I guess I have been wery fortunate with my colleagues but I have also experienced that it has payed off that I from the beginning have taken full responsibility for my situation.