Neighbor problems

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Ok, so my neighbor has been my friend for years since HS. Okay. And she's helped me with a lot of things. But lately, and I have yet to see whether she saw my pm on fb, she has my stress level way high and i am pissed as hell. pardon my language. First off, none of my business, but it's been brought up with my parents from her husband that she's drained his and her own bank account and left nothing left and they have kids.

But the thing that has me pissed the most is that she has this "do it the easy peasy way" where she doesn't deal with her problems. Will call this neighbor woman "H." Now H again is a friend of mine. Her husband can't get anything through to her. She's caused nothing but drama. She's lied. She's generally been a a b***h to her friends, but me. This starts on and off, because of some mental problem that i don't think she's addressing. There is a girl that she's friends with that i also am friends with. Well, "M" has given up on her and just said it was her true nature. I beg to differ, but at least M doesn't lie bout her. They don't talk. H's kids love both of them and hate that they don't talk to each other presumably. H's husband had plans to taker the kids to to see M, because he's friends with M and her husband. Well, then my mom was going to and apparently H found out and won't let the kids see my mom anymore. Now my mom is trying to think of it as less to deal with. She loves the kids, but they can be a little much sometimes.

Another thing that's got me on edge lately is that someone called Child and Youth Services on H's family. Even the kids will tell you they aren't being hit at home. This next info didn't come from H, but from someone else the family knows. It was said that M called CYS. There was no reason at all for them to be called. No proof of anything going on there and we live next door! Like feet away! If something happens, we know! I haven't talked to M about this, but me and my mom can say without a shadow of a doubt that M is a better person than that! She didn't call CYS. So now we have ome lying half wit causing drama. What is it about this mfing planet that people can't leave well enough alone? REALLY?!?! If you see nothing going on and you don't like someone, do you make trouble for them? That's fing childish! But that's not an issue i can really take with her, since H and M said nothing, thoubh H hasn't said so, I think she thinks M called CYS. She didn't, of that i'm sure.

Being an aspie, I don't know the best way to deal with this, but my instincts and my heart tell me, to get H to talk to me. Knowing me, she'll know I'm not the judging type. She knows I'm her friend. Frankly though, I'm scared to talk to her about it, but I feel it's my turn to help her. I think she needs to face her problems. Frankly I want to slap her, but that's not happening. I can't do that no matter how much I want to.

Can someone help? :'( I'm all stressed out.

Ok you got two things to deal with here. First, H's personality, and second, Child Services.

1) Honestly if it bothers you that much, you need to determine if you are willing to sever ties in order to preserve your sanity. She is going to bring you down with her emotionally and it will suck. You need to just approach her about it and say that you want to help but she needs help. If all else fails, say choose me or your habits. Now someone may disagree but that's how I'd do it.
2) If you're sure M didn't call CPS, then just let it go. If you can't let it go, ask the person who told you where they got their information. If their source is unreliable, then make them confront M.

not sure the cys thing matters much anymore. my mom figured it out, but when she told me, i got confused. don't know that i care to ask for a third time, but i guess the one that said M called was just blabbing her mouth.

Dunno, sounds like H needs to straighten herself out. As much as you might want to, I doubt that you, or anyone else, can do this for her.

She chose to be a two faced selfish b***h. Some friend she turned out to be. Check this. I im her and she claims to have no problem. I explain she lies and then she goes off on me. Andthen she puts me on ignore and hang on her porch with a cig. Well, i can't let childishness go and so i look out the door and run out on to the porch to tell her about herself. She lies without knowing she's a liar. "Oh, did you hear this from M?" "Wanna hear my side?" She doesn't have a side. I see what affect she has on everyone, even my mom. And i was like btw your husband was going to take the kids to see M anyway. My mom brought them to her, because it was good for them. They don't have model parents. She says that he had no plans to do so. Are you calling my mom a liar? Ask your husband? 35 years of knowing my mom. She doesn't lie. I hate her now. Good riddence to two faced rubbish. X(

If I were you, I would stay completely out of it, not comment on any of it to anybody at all, don't get involved and try to help, don't let her know how you feel or that you know any of it. Just be really busy with something else. Too busy to talk when she calls or comes over. Pretend to be sick if you have to.

The reason I say this is that when you get into somebody else's personal problems like that, no matter what you do and how hard you try to help them, it will always come back around and bite you on the ass. I'm not being cold or mean. But stay out of it. The last thing you need is to get caught up in somebody's big drama like that.

Yeah, well it would've eaten me up inside if i didn't confront her just that one time. I'm not talking to her anymore. If she starts with me, i'll put my finger to the lips like i'm saying "shhhhh." and just point at her and have it be the end of that encounter. As far as I'm concerned she's dead to me.

I don't want this to turn me into a hermit and just stay away from everyone period. I don't want this to turn me into someone that is too afraid to meet new people, just because I'm afraid I'll be hurt again. I don't want that, so i'm just going to keep watch over what happens next. Whether cops or cys take their kids away. I'll be there to see it all, not that I can avoid it since the houses are litterally feet away.