How to keep friends?

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if there an open person and they seem friendly i can make friends with them but with no clue on weather they like me or not and end up worrying mostly thinking am i acting appropriately? and im not bugging them by maybe talking to much or texting to much? and then it drifts and then i lose them as a friend. Then there is closed people where i cant tell with them at all if there even a friend at all never mind trying to keep them i cant tell anything with them its like a blank canvas. Does any one have any tips or anything that would help me because i have no friends and it gets to me. i dont even have friends to talk to on facebook or anything because i find it difficult to keep a conversation x

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Xxx My Kids Are My World xxX
i have an aspie 9 yr old son diagnosed,6 yr old son,3 year old son (waiting on diagnosis) and a baby girl at 1 yr old
Xxx I LOVE MY KIDS SOOO MUCH xxX

Im unofficial diagnosis 144 out of 200

I hate facebook with a passion, and certainly wouldn't try and find friendship there. People have thousands of disposable "friends" there, probably 'cause they seek affirmation.

Making friends? Try and contact people who share your interests. Playing cards, winetasting, arts, etc. Anything from an "organized circle" will make it easier, as you already have something in common and don't have to make any first move to meet up.

Keeping friends? That's the tricky part, at least for me it is.

From personal experience, begging them not to go doesn't work.

Invitation is key to keeping friends.

Starting a topic of conversation and/or initiating an activity is like hosting a party. Whoever initiates is extending an invitation for others to come to the party.
If you are one who always seems to rely on the other person to "host" the party it could become burdensome to them and that may be why the relationship fades.

Long term friendships are built on reciprocity. If the relationship grows silent "invite" them to a "party" by throwing out a topic of conversation (cheat sheets are acceptable...search for conversation topics) or hosting an activity such as game night, a bike ride, movie night and coffee afterwards(this is great because you won't have to talk too much for the first two hours and then at coffee you can talk about the movie!) If you host an event that has time for more talk make sure you have some conversation starters in your pocket like would you rather or trivia questions. If a question spurs a topic ride it out, when the topic fizzles pull out another. There are a lot of quick time games like Pit, Apples to Apples or even Yatzee that make good conversation filler and takes some of the pressure off to constantly talk. I have a friend who carries these cards in her purse and whips them out when we go out in a group that is primarily made up of half NT and half AS and the AS folks handle themselves pretty well with this little tool.

Don't worry if this sometimes bombs out, we nt's do all the time but it doesn't stump us and we have the advantage of a quicker recovery of it but I assure you it does happen. If you exhaust your topics and the "party" winds down it is ok to say goodnight but don't be afraid to "host" again sometime soon if you are really interested in them. Dare to be a little playful, silly and not so hung up whether you are doing it right or not, even spoof on your own quirks a little to ease any tensions you may be experiencing. If you get lost in the whether you are doing it right or not you may appear to be disinterested or maybe even bored with the company.

I know an AS fellow who started inviting people with a simple bowl of chocolates just sitting on his desk, he would invite them to have some when they came to inquire about work. Then he graduated to inviting them when he headed out to lunch instead of always waiting for them to invite him. Progress is sometimes slow but think of it like getting your sea legs, sometimes it will feel wobbly and sometimes you might be knocked on your bum but if the interest is there it is worth persevering through what may seem like failure at first.

Good luck!

When you figure this out, let me know. I lose an average of one friend a year.