Do people tell you your too quiet?

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"Hey Feyokien, just reminding you its been twenty minutes or more since you last said something" x10000000

I get that awkward feeling when my quietness is clearly making the other person feel awkward, which is why I like to avoid situations where this is possible. As for wanting to 'reach out' but really not having the tools, now that's on another level of frustration.

People I don't know well will often comment that I haven't said much and ask if I'm alright, which is their attempt at inclusion, which I can't resent. Just thought I'd also add that like 'AspieGuy96', I'm also in the camp of having no real obsessions to talk endlessly about, and so I'm very quiet even compared to the few other aspies I've met. I sometimes wonder if some presently unrecognised diagnosis might apply to me, but I guess I'll stick with ASD.

When I was a child I don't remember being told I was quiet. I think I was probably more outspoken then. I became quiet with age. sometimes at parties a close friend with tell me I'm
Being awkward or will ask me why I'm not talking to anyone. It goes beyond being merely socially anxious and has more to do with an issue inserting myself into group conversations or participating in small talk or what people in the UK call "banter". I'm quiet when topics are outside my narrow range of interests but feel rather fluent in my speech when people discuss my interests. In group concersations I need someone to look at me or try to include me in order for me to contribute, but if people are just exchanging banter there isn't much I can say

Exactly the same with me. The 'Teacher's Comments' sections for me generally consisted of "She is a quiet and conscientious student,".

That's usually the first thing people tell me when they meet me, to be honest. I often get asked why I'm so quiet. I want to ask them why they're so loud. >.<
But I'm only so quiet because often people talk about things that I don't know very much about, or I just feel too socially anxious to add any input. I find it a lot easier to talk to people when one of my interests come up.

The amount of times that has come up on my reports, holy s**t. That exact sentence. Word for word.

I recently looked over my report cards. Take away that "S" and yes, that came up word for word repeatedly. Even though I went to schools in two completely different provinces the comments were nearly identical. I was almost speechless to find my suspected Aspie fiancee had comments literally word for word identical to mine even growing up in different provinces and dates.

I have to admit when she is quiet it makes me VERY anxious. The reason for this is that everyone else I have dated silence = trouble ahead.

I've recently come to the realization I'd say this year that I have to be true to myself more. I am no attention getting, loud person.

I have been called quiet my whole life, even by distant family members. It seems in every institutional group I've been a part of, school and other organizations, have had people make a large note of that. I've gotten everything from "What's the matter with you?" and worse. It causes you to be taken advantage of and so forth. It started in a extracurricular activity I took part in many years ago, I was in middle school or something. A girl said, "oh him, he doesn't talk." I tried to tell her I could but she just replied, "no you don't" to every attempt I made. I then realized I really wasn't talking to the other kids in past meetings. Soon my family took notice of every time I was quiet and not showing I cared for interaction. It was what caused me to get the diagnosis of Aspergers in the first place. Yes, I have also been part of the "quiet people are killers" joke too.

I've seen on at least TV shows, that when someone is incredibly overweight, or short, or had their face horrendously burned, someone has stepped up to know who they are beyond the problem and not give up on them. I sometimes wished that someone would have done that to me in the past, but that's what it is, the past. There's being happy at home, and wondering who's going to notice you're acting a little unusual outside, which brings me back to what I wrote at the top, I'm going to be more honest with myself rather than thinking on how to argue with negative people on how I simply am.

I have heard it throughout my life, more often when I was growing up and less often as I get older. And not just that I'm verbally quiet, but physically quiet...I mean often I surprise people because they didn't hear me walking up or moving around, or they forget that I'm there.

I can also turn into a chatterbox sometimes, and just go on and on, similar to how Anne of Green Gables would just prattle on in a monologue.

I got told that quite a few times but some of the times were 2nd hand. I usually answer with something like I don't know what to say which is true but it's not always due to anxiety or worrying I'll say the wrong stuff. I just don't have any thoughts about what to say sometimes.

^ That goes for me too. For me it's never about worrying about saying something wrong, it's always about not having anything to say, not coming up with anything.

Yes, I was also told I was too quiet. Once someone wrote in my high school yearbook something like: there are two kinds of quiet people: those who are always thinking profound thoughts, and those who have nothing to say. I assume you are the first type.

Actually i felt more like the second, but it was obvious that meant you were "stupid", so I started trying to pretend to myself that I was some kind of inscrutable philosopher. LOL.

That's a strangely polarized view for that person to take...probably most of us go back and forth from one to the other.

And not having something to say isn't necessarily a reflection on you or how you think, sometimes it just means that what other people are talking about is stupid.

People wrote a lot of comments in my yearbooks about how quiet I was, especially in middle school.

I was the kid who got thrown out of class for talking too much.

latley I've been told alot. butI'm often afraid to talk anyomore. when I do talk people get irritated, its a no wine situation

The actual comment may not have been as polarizing as I remember, since it has passed through my filter of black-and-white thinking. I am not always so good at shades of gray.

I think there is something to that stereotype that people on the spectrum talk primarily to give or request information, which is not the main reason for a lot of social communication by other people. Usually I am quiet because nobody has asked for my views and there doesn't seem to be any need to interject. I am strongly tempted to interject when someone makes a factual mistake or seems confused about something within my area of expertise, though.

I'm always too quiet, except when I' too loud.