Confidence And Making Friends

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I have Aspergers, ADHD, Depression, and recently got diagnosed with Bipolar I. I'm a seventeen year old girl and I've been struggling with my self-confidence. I have very low self esteem. I've always kind of been that way. I'm trying to build up my confidence, but not sure how to do that. I'm unconfident because I focus on all the things I don't like about myself instead of all the things I should appreciate. I've tried looking things up online and even reading books, but it never quite helps. I want to be able to have a close group of friends but shyness stops me from getting there. I also want to talk to guys, but then I start to feel uncomfortable. I know that if I feel uncomfortable sometimes it shows and I give off a weird and awkward vibe. I'm even worried that people will judge me if I say the wrong things. I'd rather just not say anything and not risk people being uncomfortable talking to me. I'm trying to be grateful for the few friends I do have and my family that I get to see quite often. I really wish I would stop focusing on the negative, gain my self confidence, and make close friends. What should I do to get to that point?

Are their many situations where you are around many people talking but don't feel pressured?

Yes when I'm around my whole family. I have a large family and I'm comfortable around them and say what ever I need to say. and I have a few friends and we sometimes hang in a group together. I feel like we don't hang out enough for me to get to know them better to where I feel more of myself.

Its good you have a family you feel comfortable around. You could try to ask them for advice. I don't have all the answers but I find that a way to get used to people you are unfamiliar with could be to attempt to join in with their conversations. Maybe you could ask them a question about something they said or would like to talk about. That way you get into a conversation with someone else and gradually you get more practiced with it adjusting to talking to people you are unfamiliar with. It will gradually ease your anxiety about coming across as awkward as you are more adjusted to being around others. Don't be afraid about coming across as anxious or shy it is so common for many people and they probably won't care.

How is it interacting with friends?

Thank you for trying to help. I really appreciate it! I only have a few friends, but while interacting with some of them I feel comfortable and feel like I can be myself. And with Some of my other friends I'm not that comfortable with when hanging out.

Maybe you and your friends are quite different it makes interaction a little harder. But take away the anxiety what is their really to be afraid of when it comes to talking?

I mean you seem to be able to talk to your friends and family well, what is there to be afraid of?

I just don't know them well enough so it makes it harder for me to communicate. It takes me a little while to get comfortable around some people. I'm not afraid I just get very high anxiety sometimes when talking to people I'm not use to talking to.

There are ways to speed up the process.

Well what are some things you could talk about with them. What do they like talking about?

lots of different things. like movies and music.

You probably know this yourself and may have tried it. But try talking to them about things they are interested and ask them questions. It can make conversation less awkward as well as making yourself used to it.

okay Thank you