Don't Be Overly Loyal

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Save that quality for when it is established that you and this other person have the same designs on the friendship.

Don't make yourself available all the time for their needs. Don't initiate all the contacting. Let off the gas and see if they call you.

While you may feel a connection with the other person and than be hyper loyal to them, they may not feel the same for you. Worst case scenario they take advantage of you. Most often the person is uncomfortable with what they perceive as needy.

Good advice.
Also don't become loyal if they do a few nice things for you.
Watch all of their behaviour, are they honest, how do they treat others even people they don't like.
If they're backstabby to other people it can be a sign they do the same to you.

Sometimes people can be good, but later on turn on you.

You're right about that!! !! !

That's some good advice you have, but be careful that you don't step too far into being unloyal. Otherwise, being an alphamale jerk. Never be a jerk. Jerks get nobody.

Nobody is suggesting you be purposely unloyal. Just don't put it out there so quickly.

Exactly. You don't want to seem like you'll kiss another person's foot at a moment's notice.

Nobody is anybody's king or queen.

People seem to like a little mystery in friendships whereas we like predictability.

My general mistrust of people I don't know who go on to talk to me and turn out to seem friendly/polite often makes my internal rough guess of who they are do a one eighty from negative to highly positive.
It worries me that I suffer from some ingrained naivety in this regard, that I'm too easily pulled in by a few kind gestures/words and overestimate the person because my need for any kind of connection with others is so much stronger than my natural instincts. 'Don't be overly loyal' is a motto I could (sadly) live by, though I can't help but feel pessimistic based on my few rubbish experiences of past friends who've become nightmarish fiends at the drop of a hat...

Most of my friends are in a hard place in life and I try my hardest to comfort them.

Great advice

But I do have a question in return, when are a really good friendship established enough?

Back in the days, I had a close friendship, I told my secrets to her and she said hers. We did know each other for a couple of years first and was hanging out a lot but unfortunately we become angry with each other one time and it all stopped in a big argue, we never talked since. It´s been 10 years now and we had 0 contact since that day.

If you are a true friend, then you are going to be loyal because you are committing to that relationship and it's the way it is.

That includes
1. Standing up for the other person
2. Being there for them when they go through the rough times
3. Calling them to see how they are doing
4. Being there for their special events

Being overly loyal means that you are putting too much trust in a person to the point that you don't let them breathe.

I agree with you on this.

I know the feel. I was recently screwed over by this "friend" who i thought was my friend, later to find out that the person was psychoanalyzing my traits behind my back, along with the phrases "she's socially awkward" and "she keeps a conversation going on forever..." ... You learn these things as you go on. A good friend takes time to find, so don't fall for fakes/snakes!! !