Do you have friends?

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Much of what's been posted in the thread resonates with me, but lately especially this. It's really odd to me that, whenever you try to establish a connection and take the initiative in socialisation (which, for most of us on the spectrum is difficult enough to begin with), you'll get rejected simply because they find you strange (?). Then, when you don't attempt to socialise, they'll likewise think ill of you. It's a no-win situation.

It has on multiple occasions caused me to adopt a standoffish aloof attitude, and let others take the initiative in approaching me. I've decided I get to be picky in the company I wish to keep, and I prefer to be the one doing the rejecting instead of being on the receiving end of it.

And no, I have no friends, though I've attempted to seek out friends for the better part of a decade before giving up on it. However, I am planning to adopt a couple of cats in the near future. I'm pretty much a cat in a human body anyway.

Yes,
I have friends even though I have had some that are moving into new areas of their life, I have managed to connect with two other females in my age group.

One Aspie friend here at college and two friends left over from high school, both likely somewhere on the spectrum. I haven’t seen either of those two in months, though. One of them has his first girlfriend and doesn’t have time for me anymore.

I have two friends that I know are always going to be there for me, but I've recently moved states and hardly get to talk with them anymore. Everyone else is more of an acquaintance, and I haven't made any since I left Utah.

I don't have a human friend in real life at the moment, but I don't want one. I'm living with my parents now & I go to a support group semi-regularly. I have a frenemy. That's about all I can handle.

Getting a job has been the main event to advance my social life in a while, and that's still pretty shallow. I have one friend that I've known since primary school. I have trouble making lasting connections besides that and when I do I usually end up losing respect for the person for one reason or another.

Trough my school years I never had any friends. I just did not understand how to connect with others and I was very dependent on my younger brother whenever I was around other people. I remember once I felt very ashamed and sad after we had some kind of argument and he ridiculed me for having no friends. But in the last years after getting diagnosed and I found the autism community it got much more easy. I now have some friends I just wished it happened sooner in life, that someone took it upon themselves to introduce me to the other weird and lonely kids around, than hopefully school wouldn't been so painful.

No I haven't had friends for about 8 years and as I am now disabled I cannot imagine I will ever have friends again, I don't ever meet people and if I did I would have nothing to talk to them about.

I have two friends from work. I care for them and they do seem to care for me. I find it difficult to accept (that they consider me a friend) because they are the first friends I have made in twenty six years.

I've struggled with friends all my life, even my parents used to make me feel bad about not having any friends. But right now I feel lucky that I have probably 5 people I would call friends, which is more than enough. Most of them I made through forced circumstances (e.g. having to work together) and it's taken years to develop to the point where it feels comfortable.

Over the years I've learned not to care or put pressure on myself to make friends. If I'm in a situation where there is an opportunity to meet people I usually get approached, but 9/10 times they are instantly put off by my awkwardness. Even if they're not, it takes a lot longer than your average person to turn it into a friendship, if at all. With ASD having a social life is pretty exhausting anyway. Just going out with someone now and again is enough for me. I am also wary of falling into the trap of someone being nice, but really they're just using me or putting me down. I'd rather be alone than have a toxic friendship (been there, done that).

I feel like the friends I have are quite pessimistic. But I don't know how to climb away from that pessimism.

I'm in my final year of school and this is probably the first time I can properly answer yes to that question. I have always struggled with realizing when someone is actually my friend. When I did have friends I often found myself being less a friend, but simply a pushover. The good people I have found myself friends with are often often interested in being casual friends. Chatting at school and maybe having each other's numbers, but I've never had a best friend. Still don't. Mostly though I had no friends throughout school and sat along most of the time. Strangely enough this year when I did find myself a close friend she is not how I imagined at all being very extroverted and that one girl who seems to always be throwing a party.If this were a bad american movie could be described as popular. We have absolutely nothing in common, which we find hilarious as it has not affected our ability to have conversations. There are also other friends I have made. Sadly we're going different ways next year so I don't have much hope for our friendship continuing, but at least now I know I am capable of making a real friend

Trust me I get that. As someone who had no friends for about six years before finding people it is possible. The friends I have now don't have anything in common with me yet I still find it easy to talk to them. Besides you'd be surprised how much you can have in common with people. As for how your disabilities you'll find that few people would turn someone away for a reason like that. I don't know your condition(s) but as someone who is aspergers, ADD, short term memory loss and have had a lot of issues with anxiety and even depression they won't care. I will admit it can be hard to talk about Aspergers with neurotypical people as they don't really know how to and become uncomfortable quickly, but hey you could always find friends who are also autistic or have their own disabilities or mental illnesses. I go to this art club for the disabled sometimes and I know my cousin, who also have autism as well as other issues has found plenty of friends there. Online is also a possibility.

My disabilities are physical as I have no employment and no realistic prospect of it I never meet people, my social skills are bad but not awful if I was in a position to make friends I think I probably could.

I would suggest meeting people online then. I have made a lot of good friends that way. Or if it is possible my suggestion for something like the art club my cousin goes to still stands. Their disabilities are physical as well, but i don't know your situation.

I've been a loner my whole life & in my head so much that I never really cared about having friends too much. I have a girlfriend rite now who I'm living with & I met her on this forum. She messaged me after reading a lot of my posts. I also have one friend from work. He was my supervisor but I only see him 1ce or 2wice a year since I moved across the country to be with my girlfriend.