My wife had a bachelorette party but I didn't get one

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I'm just sad. I never thought I would be lucky enough to marry a beautiful woman, but here I am with the person I intend to spend the rest of my life with. I can't get over the fact that my wife will be out partying on a Friday night, but I will be sitting at home. I can't get enough people together for a party of my own. This is why wedding stuff scares me. I don't have a social network, so at a time when I'm supposed to be celebrating, I'm crying and lonely. She tried to help, but she doesn't really understand my situation. She doesn't understand the privilege that she was born with. For her, it's simple to get some people together. Truth is, no one cares enough about me to throw me a party. I was okay with isolation for a long time, but on occasions like this, it can be painful.

I am sorry that happened to you but have you thought about finding your closest friends you care about do doing something fun tonight? Don't worry if she is throwing a huge bachelorette party because you matter too. There is also a reason why you are together as a couple. If anything she adores you. You are also going to have a great wedding along with starting a new life together.

How about listening to some positive affirmations?
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6Eer8WjOqk

2. Go out and celebrate with your friends or go to an LGBT friendly bar and make an announcement to the DJ that you are getting married tomorrow because those people will celebrate you. I am sure they would make an announcement.

(I am an extravert so I like that stuff)

My bachelor party consisted of my brothers trying to get me drunk in a hotel parking lot, and then one of them running through a glass door.

bachelor party....overrated. Mine consisted of two friends of mine taking me to a local topless dive bar that looked like it could have been a set from Blue Velvet or Beetlejuice. I think the dancer was in her fifties and I felt sorry for her more than anything else. I'd only been in strip clubs a few times previously and found them disgusting and the opposite of titillating. Yuck.

I didn't get one either.

I bet your wife did!

Another reason why I'm not getting married. People know full well what goes on at them.

You make me think of my dad. He didn't really have anyone sitting on his side of the church other than his parents, my mom's aunt and uncle, and one other guy he was friends with. He invited a bunch of people that he thought were his friends, but they didn't come or send gifts or cards. I don't think he had a bachelor party either. I don't think his jerk of a brother even bothered to show up. My mom is no longer friends with any of her friends that were at the wedding. They all eventually screwed her over or turned out to be frenemies.

If I were to find a man and get married, I wouldn't have anyone to invite other than my parents and siblings. My only two friends live really far away from me and can't afford to come down my way.

At least you are getting married to someone you love. I hope you and your lady have a great life together.

From a practical standpoint, do you plan on doing anything about it? It sounds like you already have someone who can help.

I have a book called Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships that might help. Friendships aren’t really rocket science. Its mostly boils down to seeing things from other’s prespectives.

That's a wonderful book and I bought it at a talk that Temple Grand in did which I have sign. She goes, "I think this book will really help you." I have read half of it and could relate to a lot of the things that she did in childhood. Sean Barron has a lot of good advice too. I need to finish it though.

I have been divorced for many years now, but I can honestly say, it never once crossed my mind until reading this that I never had a bachelor's party. Your partner is what truly matters, I hope you both live a long and happy fulfilling life together.

Well since misery loves company I started a new job 3 Mondays ago on my 25th birthday, instead of partying.

Congrats Cberg and Happy Belated birthday. If I recall, my 25th birthday didn't consist of a big party either but rather a couple of friends who I met at a gathering at an autism support group. I also recall inviting a big crush at the time who came and ignored me the whole time and talked to another girl in front of me.

I think I had mentioned that my boss and my former co-workers made no time for my housewarming party and didn't get me anything in cards or gifts. Yet, they were there for each other. All the while an ex-friend of mine broke her promise about helping me get set up. Instead, she went shopping for her wedding gown with another friend because she was engaged and showed up late and only stayed for a little while before sneaking out the door. However, she wasn't a supportive friend to begin with and nor was she a real friend period.


LadyElaine, I am sorry this happened to your parents on their wedding and that was very rude of those fake friends to treat your father like that.

What do you need a party for? I never liked the concept... Not sure you'd want to hang out with your friends at some smokey strip club getting drunk "just for fun" unless that's your idea of actually having fun. If she wants to do her thing let her I guess, if not being unfaithful, next day you're gonna live the rest of your lives together.

Heh well you're cool, not too many people spared a thought about my 25th.

You are so welcome and I learned something recently, yes there are people who aren't capable of bending over backward for people who fit outside of their mold while you bend over for them. However, you have to be grateful for the people who did go out of their way for you because they are real people in the first place. It sounds like you had a few people acknowledge you and that's what counts.