Be careful who you tell things to
I thought this girl at work (let's call her girl A) was a friend but I was wrong. There's this girl who we both know (call her girl B) but I wasn't keen on her because she flirted with my boyfriend before and I got paranoid, so I told girl A that I didn't like girl B, assuming and trusting that she wouldn't tell girl B that I said that. Girl A and girl B aren't close friends, they just know each other through me. But apparently girl A must have told girl B what I said, because today girl B came up to me and she told me that there's nothing going on between her and my boyfriend and that she loves her own boyfriend. She was friendly about it, and I said sorry and told her that it was just a misunderstanding, and we hugged. I didn't ask her who told her, but I assume it was girl A, because she was the only one I told about how I felt about girl B.
I just wish people wouldn't tell people what you say. I mean, girl A has told me before that she dislikes one of the men at work because his personality just 'pisses her off', and I find the guy is rather nice and good company, but I wouldn't go up to him and tell him that girl A doesn't like him. It's something you keep to yourself. I just thought I'd confide in girl A because I thought she was a friend, but apparently not. I mean, girl A doesn't know girl B well enough to be a best friend, and so I just assumed she wouldn't tell her what I said. I mean, what girl B doesn't know can't hurt her. I bet people talk about me behind my back, because it's what people do, but I'd rather not know because what I don't know won't hurt me.
So I've learnt to not tell people about who you like and don't like, unless you know you can definitely trust them, like if they are a close relative or a really good friend who you'd tell anything to, or your soulmate or whoever you know you can trust. But work colleagues who are just friends with you at work, just keep your mouth shut. I've learnt my lesson now.
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Female
I just wish people wouldn't tell people what you say. I mean, girl A has told me before that she dislikes one of the men at work because his personality just 'pisses her off', and I find the guy is rather nice and good company, but I wouldn't go up to him and tell him that girl A doesn't like him. It's something you keep to yourself. I just thought I'd confide in girl A because I thought she was a friend, but apparently not. I mean, girl A doesn't know girl B well enough to be a best friend, and so I just assumed she wouldn't tell her what I said. I mean, what girl B doesn't know can't hurt her. I bet people talk about me behind my back, because it's what people do, but I'd rather not know because what I don't know won't hurt me.
So I've learnt to not tell people about who you like and don't like, unless you know you can definitely trust them, like if they are a close relative or a really good friend who you'd tell anything to, or your soulmate or whoever you know you can trust. But work colleagues who are just friends with you at work, just keep your mouth shut. I've learnt my lesson now.
I'm almost the exact opposite and sometimes I wish I wasn't. I've gotten to the point where I don't even share certain things anonymously because I'm paranoid that people will find out.
If you can't keep your mouth shut about a particular thing, you can't expect others to
The same impulse that had you tell your friend this was probably present when your friend told the other person
Well me telling my friend how I felt about somebody was less harmful than her telling the other person. People tell me things they don't like about other people, but I don't go and repeat it to them. I don't even get the urge to. It's sometimes nice to have somebody confide in you, and that they trust you. Normally it's a hidden rule not to go repeating things to other people.
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Female
There are people out there who can appear to be your friend but what they really do is gather information so they can make fun of you behind your back because.
1. They have nothing else better to do
2. They have qualities that you have which they lack so they don't like themselves
3. Others gather that information because there are those who will do anything to get attention due to lack of self-worth and self-esteem.
1. They have nothing else better to do
2. They have qualities that you have which they lack so they don't like themselves
3. Others gather that information because there are those who will do anything to get attention due to lack of self-worth and self-esteem.
Very good points.
Before the misunderstanding, I saw girl B as a threat to my relationship with my boyfriend, and I was just annoyed with her and that was why I confided in girl A.
But maybe girl A wasn't intending to cause trouble, maybe she said something to girl B because she was concerned and didn't want girl B to cause upset for me. It's just that girl A often tells me things about people we know, and she trusts me not to tell them, otherwise she probably wouldn't tell me at all. It's just that I've had 3 jobs in my life so far (1 voluntary and 2 paid), and in all of them I have experienced colleagues telling each other things about other people, because it seems that's what people do, it's a human thing. People have most probably talked about me too, which I don't mind as long as I don't know. It hurts when you find out that you've been spoken about negatively, but if you don't know then obviously you can't (or shouldn't) dwell on it.
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Female
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