Trouble Forming Emotional Attachments

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Joined: 24 Jun 2004
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15 Sep 2005, 11:00 pm

I wonder if part of my social problems is being unable to form emotional attachments of any significance with most other people. I'm having any trouble thinking of anyone I have a really strong, healthy emotional bond with. My attachment to my paternal grandmother and grandfather has become somewhat stiff over the years. I have become very reserved around my paternal uncle, aunt, and cousins, who I used to be more open and fun with as a young kid. I haven't seen them nearly as much in recent years, and I've noticed they're aware my socio-emotional understanding is below theirs now (the twins are just entering high school).

I never had a very strong emotional attachment to either my mother or father.

A couple of years ago, I met a girl I really, really liked and opened up emotionally with her; I got burned bad! Since then perhaps I've become even more emotionally "walled off." I don't really know; I understand my own emotions perfectly well, though.

Does anyone else have trouble forming emotional bonds with people?

mikibacsi1124
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15 Sep 2005, 11:03 pm

I have the opposite problem...I form emotional attachments way too easily, and they become way too intense.

galatea
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15 Sep 2005, 11:36 pm

Last edited by galatea on 28 Sep 2005, 9:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

Namiko
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16 Sep 2005, 8:45 am

galatea wrote:

how did she burn u? i got burned with a bunsen burner in skool that hurt a lot

Ouch! I've done that, too. Several times.

Chemistry class is very fun and I have burned by poor hands way too many times to count (or even remember) in a combination of this year (in AP) and two years ago (in honours chem).

If I have a hard time forming emotional bonds with people, it is because either they don't understand me or I don't understand them. I tend not to express my emotions to very many people, so many see me as unemotional and extremely unsocial. But it really depends who. I'm pretty close to my family (for the most part) and have a few friends who I can share things with.

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Sarcastic_Name
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16 Sep 2005, 11:28 am

I haven't been emotionally attached to a person in a long time, but my computer isn't a person is it?

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Tak
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17 Sep 2005, 5:29 am

mikibacsi1124 wrote:

I have the opposite problem...I form emotional attachments way too easily, and they become way too intense.

Exactly what I was going to say. Thats my problem as well.

Sarcastic_Name
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17 Sep 2005, 12:14 pm

I really don't like people enough to be emotionally attached to them. All attachment has ever done is hurt me, why bother with it anymore? I'd rather be disconnected form people than be emotionally attached, less pain involved that way. I'm referring to emotional pain, for those who didn't understand me. Then again, I've had nothing but bad experiences with emotional attachment.

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Yupa
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17 Sep 2005, 2:21 pm

I have trouble forming emotional attachments, and just when the emotional attachments I do develop are starting to go really, really well, something always gets in the way. And it's usually something I have no control over.

fahreeq
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18 Sep 2005, 10:35 am

I used to be one of those people who formed emotional attachments too easily. Someone would make small talk with me once, and I thought they wanted to be friends. Or, I'd be hanging with a guy who flirted with me and I thought we were a couple after a few days or weeks.

After being badly burned repeatedly in friendship situations between the ages of 17 and 19, I seem to have lost the ability to attach to 99% of people.

mikibacsi1124
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18 Sep 2005, 11:13 am

fahreeq wrote:

I get badly burned repeatedly too, but somehow I haven't been able to keep myself from forming attachments easily.

rhubarbpluscustard
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20 Sep 2005, 2:12 pm

I don't form emotional attachments easily, but once I do they become extremely intense. I'm only seventeen so I haven't gotten badly burned yet, but I can tell that I probably will at some point, and maybe after that I'll stop getting so fiercely and painfully dependent on people.

Doorkap
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26 Sep 2005, 2:07 am

I don't know about you but the emotional thing is very important to talk about as learning is always gradual.

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