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Am satisfied with the amount of friends I have

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duck12
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19 Nov 2024, 9:00 am

I can finally say that I am satisfied with the amount of friends I have. Every week, I hang out with 8-12 people and run a pretty solid friend group in which we all do various activities every week. Getting any more friends at this point would be very overwhelming for me because I literally have too much to do during the week now and have little time for myself. I am satisfied I am now in such a position, but it can also get very overwhelming too at times to keep up with everyone's personalities and different abilities. We had a toxic person come and go from our group, and while a couple of us were still there for him, others detested him and thus he was removed from the group. He had accused me and another friend of stealing his money when we went out to Chili's to get something to eat and tried to take advantage our Ubers for him to get home. He also started to make threats and everyone just wouldn't deal with it anymore.



Jakki
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19 Nov 2024, 9:15 am

duck12 wrote:
I can finally say that I am satisfied with the amount of friends I have. Every week, I hang out with 8-12 people and run a pretty solid friend group in which we all do various activities every week. Getting any more friends at this point would be very overwhelming for me because I literally have too much to do during the week now and have little time for myself. I am satisfied I am now in such a position, but it can also get very overwhelming too at times to keep up with everyone's personalities and different abilities. We had a toxic person come and go from our group, and while a couple of us were still there for him, others detested him and thus he was removed from the group. He had accused me and another friend of stealing our money when we went out to Chili's to get something to eat and tried to take advantage our Ubers for him to get home. He also started to make threats and everyone just wouldn't deal with it anymore.


Some People can, call themselves lucky to have just 1 good friend .Sorry to hear of the one that claimed theft of money
" Have for your friends the very best of friends" Lao Tsu


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duck12
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19 Nov 2024, 9:16 am

:heart:

Jakki wrote:
duck12 wrote:
I can finally say that I am satisfied with the amount of friends I have. Every week, I hang out with 8-12 people and run a pretty solid friend group in which we all do various activities every week. Getting any more friends at this point would be very overwhelming for me because I literally have too much to do during the week now and have little time for myself. I am satisfied I am now in such a position, but it can also get very overwhelming too at times to keep up with everyone's personalities and different abilities. We had a toxic person come and go from our group, and while a couple of us were still there for him, others detested him and thus he was removed from the group. He had accused me and another friend of stealing our money when we went out to Chili's to get something to eat and tried to take advantage our Ubers for him to get home. He also started to make threats and everyone just wouldn't deal with it anymore.


Some People can, call themselves lucky to have just 1 good friend .Sorry to hear of the one that claimed theft of money


" Have for your friends the very best of friends" Lao Tsu

have a bunch of friends now who are all there for me and accept me so I guess this is an anomaly. My friend group has a total of 20 people, and about 10 of them are active.

As for the toxic one, the oldest person in our friend group has chosen to stay friends with him, but even she admitted she cannot spend long periods of time with him.

All I really need now is a partner and a good job and I am set. I recently approached a woman at a bar, something I could not do even around 5 years ago. I have also been out on some dates and have had some relationship success, so all in all, nothing right now is bad, and things have been going pretty well. Sometimes i have gone two or three consecutive days in a row seeing friends, like this week I am seeing one for the third consecutive day in a row.



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19 Nov 2024, 9:29 am

Often in the past , due to inability to focus on several peoples interactions at once ...Went out of my way , to try to not interact with more than one person at a time ... This inability , often growing up caused me to lose friends, i had discovered. Seemed if I tried to interact with two at once , often lost both as friends .
Pretty sure this was due to some influences growing up, from early on . Wish you the best with your Group you
have developed ...... 8)


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duck12
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19 Nov 2024, 9:33 am

[quote="Jakki"]Often in the past , due to inability to focus on several peoples interactions at once ...Went out of my way , to try to not interact with more than one person at a time ... This inability , often growing up caused me to lose friends, i had discovered. Seemed if I tried to interact with two at once , often lost both as friends .
Pretty sure this was due to some influences growing up, from early on . Wish you the best with your Group you
have developed ...... 8)[/quot

Thank you so very much and my hope is to continue to expand the group.



duck12
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19 Nov 2024, 9:34 am

In addition, I hope that I can also get some time to myself, because I can sure use it. Many years ago, I was depressed and had too much time for myself, nowadays I am super busy and just want some time alone, so its the exact opposite.



Jakki
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19 Nov 2024, 7:58 pm

duck12 wrote:
In addition, I hope that I can also get some time to myself, because I can sure use it. Many years ago, I was depressed and had too much time for myself, nowadays I am super busy and just want some time alone, so its the exact opposite.


The times they are a changin'. Enjoy while you are able ....being alittle older now, sometimes spoons are not available.


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blitzkrieg
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19 Nov 2024, 8:01 pm

Hanging out with 8-12 friends seems a lot even by NT standards.

You have gotten yourself well placed, socially, my brother. Take care!



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19 Nov 2024, 9:59 pm

I have that "1 person at a time" thing too.
I consider myself to have half a dozen friends now that 3 have died in the last year, they're the ones who remember I exist when they're not actually looking at me. My partner insists that all her friends prefer me to her, but I think that only applies when they can see me. The rest of the time I may as well be "the Silence".

----- Silence will fall ! -----