ladyelaine wrote:
Why can't everybody just get along and play nice? Why are girls so full of drama?
Young girls (e.g., 'Tweens' and Teens) may not feel they have any place in society unless they are popular, and that the only way to be popular is to have social power over others. Girls learn to use meanness, including humiliating and shunning other girls, to obtain their power and position within their peer group (e.g., the female 'in-crowd'). Factors that relate closely to a girl’s popularity are certain physical characteristics (i.e., hair style and length, body type, weight, bust size, et cetera). Higher-status (e.g., 'popular') girls are most likely to use meanness and exclusion (e.g., "social aggression") to improve their social standing, while lower status girls were more likely to use niceness and cohesiveness (e.g., "social inclusion") to improve their standings. Social aggression is not something girls are born with, it is a learned behavior; they learn that social aggression -- as opposed to physical aggression -- is one of the few tools available to girls to help them navigate their social world and join the female 'in-crowd'. Putting someone else down somehow makes girls feel more powerful and more popular in the same way that physical bullying somehow makes boys feel more powerful and more popular.
Incidentally, as a way of "getting back" at boys who ignore them or are disrespectful to them, girls will socially 'blackball' those boys, who will soon find that they cannot get a date with any girl who wants to be part of their in-crowd -- which is most (if not all) girls. Boys who come off as 'creepy' to just one "mean girl" will soon find that all (or most) girls will declare him as 'creepy' too, just to be part of the female in-crowd.
Then, to be accepted by the female 'in-crowd', members of the male 'in-crowd' will start verbally and physically abusing the 'creepy' boy, who may have no idea why he is being both shunned by female peers and beaten up by his male peers.
People are mean, and driven by greed, romantic or sexual lust, or power -- all of which being part of the in-crowd can satisfy.