What came first, an antisocial tendency or special interest?

Post Reply New Topic

My special interests and social isolation are such a blur. The first special interest I had was a tiny ceramic dashaund that I carried with me all the time and it seemed to take on a life of its own. Of course I was already socially withdrawn at the time because I moved, mom got remarried, and my natural father gave me up for adoption. It was alot to handle for a 7 year old. So I just withdrew into myself and my ceramic dog for about a year. After that I started an interest in animals and dinosaurs, but then I got so involved in that, I wanted to be an animal and often acted like one which caused much social problems when I barked at my classmates and ate grass in the front yard.
But I have to say that the social isolation started it, but the interests fueled the fire, so to speak.

For me, being socially isolated caused what everyone seems to be calling "special interests" to develop.

I guess I can say that it all started in junior high school. For those two years I think I literally had zero friends and almost no interaction with anyone. After a point I stopped even trying to make friends or talk to anyone. I went to school. I went home. I did it all over again.

I think my first interest (that I can truly recognize and remember) started up in eighth grade science class when we started on properites of minerals and gemstones. I wanted to be able to identify every kind of gemstone there was and I even have a collection of uncut stones from then. I went to a gemstone mine in the mountains on vacation a few years ago, and it was just awesome because I knew the name of almost every stone I saw. The ones I didn't know, I had to go look up later! I think that interest has faded a little bit (does that happen to anyone else?) but I still do have an uncut Amethyst I carry around with me in my pocket most days.

Later on in school I discovered this place called a library (because I could never handle the cafeteria at lunchtime...like, not ever!) and that kinda paved the way for my other interest: World religions and mythology, and how much I like to be able to identify wild plants and herbs.

But enough about me. What point was I making? Oh yeah, having no friends definitely sparked my special interests!

When I was younger, I was so focused on anime and finding other people who like it that I pretty much made myself a social outcast. Other people were boring, uninteresting, etc etc. But I think I just learned to adapt to not having any friends by the point my interest started. And oddly enough, my special interest caused my social withdrawal.

The Internet, and my love for anime, is what keeps me away from social situations now. Because I was socially outcast, I adapted to that and stopped caring that I had no friends. Now I'm starting to care about that again. My Asperger's is starting to affect online relationships as well. The primary reason I came to this forum was to make friends, learn about Asperger's, and find people to connect with. This forum so far has caught my attention far more than I thought it would to begin with.

In fact, I'm not bombarding my crush with messages like I usually do because I'm too busy replying to threads on this forum.

I think they both kinda occurred together hand in hand for me. I never seemed normal & I've always had social problems & unique interest. I think they both played off each other