"But you don't /seem/ like you have aperger's..."

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All the time. It is f*****g annoying because they judge you out of what they see, not of what is on the inside. If they could see all the misery i've had in life, they probably break down crying.

The few people I've told have said this to me. That's because few people have done any amount of research on it and probably picture someone with severe Autism or something.

In my opinion it's because they're thinking of a stereotype that most people hardly fit. Methinks the general population sees people with AS to be like Steve Urkel or Sheldon from Big Bang Theory...when in reality some of us can't pass an intro math class.

Me too.

I actually don't get that a lot, or at least not that much as I want it. They do say I look sort of normal for an aspie.

I get the same thing- with the very, very few people in my life that know.

Another thing I get is "Brain injury? But you're smart! You can't have a brain injury!" Um....not all brain injuries involve the prefrontal cortex and I'm not smarter than average.

I guess females can mask it to an extent or fit in better than males, I think it could be that females can be more reserved in their social circles and don't have to take the initiative as much as males. If a female is reserved or different, her behavior isn't as questionable by social peers.

People assume that I'm good with computers and maths, maybe it is a certain vibe or characteristic I give, maybe I fit the stereotype for being someone on the spectrum stronger than others.

I've had this a few times, iv always seen it as a slight positive as it means im hiding it quite well, i believe females are supposed to be less severe probably because we can hide things more whereas men are more tuned to be outward and are socially quieter anyway (i have no idea if what im typing actually explains what i read, i did a night shift last night so am a vegetable).
Today i had this when i told the nursery manager i had aspergers when we went to view the nursery, she said i dont seem like i have it at all and it's probably because i have learnt how to cope and adapt with it and im working hard in social situations, she was right to an extent BUT it's more that i mask it too.
I suppoes it's a compliment but i think a lot of people may just say it to try to make you feel better, NT's will have an amazing nac at picking up anything that is slightly different, any problems with eye contact, any slight body language fail, and this will be sub conscious, so i think they would notice something but they may not realise it or it may take a while for them to realise, maybe the longer you know someone the more they notice which would make sense.

I always got the same response. by the end of college (high school here) people knew I was pretty socially inept by then. I found a horde of people who were kind of in the same position (not aspies, just weirdos and nerds). Then I dropped out like a ****** ****** and i've been neckbearding my way through hermitry.

I get this about my son. Those who I tell are in SHOCK!! and list all the reasons why he ISNT aspergers. They dont LIVE with my child to know what we go thru on a daily basis.

interesting that this happens to you as adults too!

Oh yeah, I get this all the time. What's odd is that they'll acknowledge that I'm different, but won't accept the diagnosis.

Hell, I still get this from family(parents and my two siblings), which really pisses me off.

^^^ this

All the time.

I guess it's supposed to be a compliment-- OK, hey, I'm fairly high-functioning.

It just scares me. Reminds me of what else can happen when you disclose-- idiots automatically assume you're a sociopath. Reminds me that I'm "too OK" to have much luck finding help with the problems I DO have.

I should be grateful. I should be grateful. I should be grateful.

I am.

I'm just not ONLY grateful. I'm also hurt and tired and frustrated and scared.

you know those awful youtube videos called, 's**t single girls say' or 's**t christians say to jews' or 's**t straight women say to gay men'? If I made one called 's**t NTs say to autistic people', this would be in it.

People are shocked when I tell them I have it because I've learned how to mask it so well. I have one friend who's said that I've outgrown and seem too normal to have it.

Whenever I get that reaction I just explain that out of being forced to deal with people on a semi-regular basis, I've learned a measure of social skills.

It's not that I'm not an aspie, I've just learned to hide it when I feel the need too.