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Snowy Owl
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13 Aug 2012, 3:42 am

Sibyl wrote:
Intonation? Surely you'd have heard "expression"... Maybe something slangly like "pizzazz" that might be too old slang for you?

Anyway, you could probably get some help from a voice coach, or a speech therapist, or the drama teacher at your school. A monotone makes you sound to other people sad, depressed, not a very interesting person, like you don't really want to be talking to them. Getting some expression into it sounds as if you have at least a little energy to expend on communication.



Yes I have heard of expression and I have used the word pizzazz before. Right now I do not have any health insurance to get any kind of help right now. Also I do not start college until two weeks from now.



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13 Aug 2012, 3:44 am

salem44dream wrote:
I apparently always had a somewhat monotone voice, but then when I went off to a college on my own with no family nearby, I had a complete breakdown and REALLY went to having a completely monotone voice.

Things are much better now (40 years later!) -- but people still pick up on the remnants of it, and will imitate me. It really upsets me, although to their faces I just laugh nervously. I'd like to shake it completely, but am not sure what else I can do. Talking about funny things and laughing certainly helps though ... I've learned that much.




Indeed, funny things do make it all better.

Oh no! I start college soon! O.O But to be honest I couldn't wait to get away from my family... but I could see how I could have a break down.



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13 Aug 2012, 3:48 am

questor wrote:
Yes, I was sometimes told this as a child and teen, less as I got older. I have always been into reading, and I gradually learned, without trying, to menally dramatize the feelings and dialogs of the characters in the books, by using what I had absorbed on TV. This was all automatic--not conscious on my part. This eventually carried over into my actual speaking, and has mostly eliminated the problem for me.

I suggest you try reading aloud some stories, and trying to dramatize them--that is, put some feeling and emphasis into the dialogs and personalities of the characters. If you do it at home, you can just explain to your family that you are trying to fix the monotone problem, by acting out and dramatizing the dialogs in the books, as practice. And remember, use what you've seen on TV as a guide, too.



Lol, oh that just sounds so silly. X-)

I am too subconscious to do such a thing...


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ibtiamat
Snowy Owl
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13 Aug 2012, 3:49 am

atdevel wrote:
My case is interesting --

On one hand, some people day that I "sound like a computer" (I spend too much time in front of one).

On the other hand, my parents say that I could sing before I could talk.

Meaning that I either sing or talk in a monotone :p



Lol! Interesting I guess, but sometimes that happens to me. Some people say I sound like I am singing but that is only 1% of the time. :?



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Snowy Owl
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13 Aug 2012, 3:51 am

SanityTheorist wrote:
My voice is and always has been very monotone, but has gotten more variance after I started doing more death metal growls in my singing (deeper too.) Planning the rise and fall of the tone helped as well.


I sing sometimes but not scream or growl. ^_^;



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13 Aug 2012, 3:52 am

Cfroi wrote:
Me2 is super monotone. I tried to pitch up my voice sometime, but my friend say why I talk like a girl


Lol. How mean. It is better than being monotone though. =/ Sometimes I sound like a boy or a 25 year old man. XD



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13 Aug 2012, 3:55 am

morslilleole wrote:
My voice too is very monotone, which often ends up making me sounds sarcastic. Or it makes people unable to tell whether I am being sarcastic or not.

Weirdly ennough, when I sing, my voie is a lot less monotome. But I can only do that when I sing to myself and none's listening.



LOL! Same here! At least with the singing part. I can only see alone to myself. And I sound much less monotone. One time someone got mad because they thought I was being sarcastic, and I was like "I am immune to sarcasm so how can I BE sarcastic??"



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13 Aug 2012, 4:00 am

VAGraduateStudent wrote:
Simon Baron Cohen writes about this in Mindblindness, which you can order from Amazon. I'm sure it's also in some other books about autism. Basically, neurotypical people (I'm NT) have this ingrained need to attract the attention of other people. So as young children, we learn to do this "rollercoaster" thing with our voices that makes them easier to listen to. An example of this can be seen in "My Fair Lady" when Eliza is learning to say "How KIND of you to let me come." The assumed reason that people on the spectrum do not learn to modulate, or vary, their voices is because they do not have an ingrained need for others to pay attention to them. As young children, they simply don't care. What they say is more for their own benefit. When people with ASD get older and realize it's important for to communicate, it takes an effort of some sort (more for some people than others), so it's never going to be as easy as NT people, who don't have to try to do it. I think a lot of people never realize they have a "flat" voice and it's not a big deal.

Here is a lengthy video explaining how to modulate your voice. I like this because it explains what is going through the heads of NTs when they do it. So it might be helpful in understanding what your friends and family are expecting.

This one looks much more useful to me for an ASD audience. I think you could actually use this to relate to others, improve interactions, and work on simple modulations. It also includes simple body language tips, which can be confusing to many people.

My opinion, as someone who has many family, friends, and exes who are aspies- is that you shouldn't worry about this too much. If you're really worried about it, you could record yourself and see if you think they're right. If it bothers you, you can work on it. I guarantee you that people value you just the way you are. :D




Wow thank you very much! Yes, I know I am valued but it can get frustrating sometimes. My aunt says nothing about it unless I ask her, she looks at me like she is REALLY trying to understand what I am saying. lol.



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13 Aug 2012, 4:06 am

salem44dream wrote:
VAGraduateStudent wrote:
My opinion, as someone who has many family, friends, and exes who are aspies- is that you shouldn't worry about this too much. If you're really worried about it, you could record yourself and see if you think they're right. If it bothers you, you can work on it. I guarantee you that people value you just the way you are. :D


I realize this wasn't directed at me, but I go through long periods of time where my extended family drops all communication with me (I live alone, but family lives within a half an hour drive). I can't figure out what I did wrong to offend them, and then I have to remind myself that MOST families do this, they let long periods of time go by without communication. However, it's still difficult to keep telling myself not to take it personally.




Hu. Sorry to intrude. But it is usually the opposite with me. My father's new wife has be acting VERY immaturely toward me and has hurt my feeling more than I can count and keeps doing it! So I stopped contact with my dad (because he was being a jerk to me as well) and his wife.

But as for my "friends" at school and I have about 10% of the school once hated me, I have about 5 ex-friends one is an ex-girlfriend they never wanted to take the time to know me, even though I thought they knew me enough to stay my friends they labeled me with so many horrible names and they only have their ignorance to blame.

You probably says something or done something to them and they took it wrong. Like you never meant to hurt someone because your intention was just to tell them something important.



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13 Aug 2012, 4:11 am

54together wrote:
I'm autistic, and nobody seems to comment on my voice being monotone. I've recorded my voice and I didn't think it sounded monotone.

I have met many autistic people in my life, but I am yet to come across one with a monotone voice.



You cannot hear it because your brain is not developed that of a NT.

I hear myself talk just fine and I think I sound fine but my mom says "What?" and "The bread in the gal's glass is blue? What?!?" and she cannot hear me most of the time and says it is because I mumble and that is resulted in monotone.

Or you couldn't not even have the monotone problem only a few Aspies have the problem.



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13 Aug 2012, 4:15 am

VAGraduateStudent wrote:
54together wrote:
I'm autistic, and nobody seems to comment on my voice being monotone. I've recorded my voice and I didn't think it sounded monotone.

I have met many autistic people in my life, but I am yet to come across one with a monotone voice.


I think it's hard for a lot of people on the spectrum to pick up on it, and I think it's one of those small things that people either overlook or are too polite to tell you about. I've heard people doing it, but they also had a flat affect to their faces and fluttery hands/feet. But when people do things like this they generally appear normal to most people- I only know about it because I think it's interesting academically and I watch for it.

Oh and I've noticed that people who watch a lot of TV or movies have better voices that people who exclusively read. People have more expression in their faces when talking to dogs, cats and small children.



LOL. I watch tv a lot and watch movies a lot or at least I used to. I watch vids online now. I never did stop to notice if I make facial expression to my cat or to my young cousins. I think I do than I do with older humans around my age.

I might study it a bit more it is interesting and I never thought I would find myself being Autistic.


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outofplace
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13 Aug 2012, 4:27 am

I used to get called "Data" by one of my high school English teachers due to my voice and tendency to blather on and on and on about things when answering a question in class.


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13 Aug 2012, 8:53 am

outofplace wrote:
I used to get called "Data" by one of my high school English teachers due to my voice and tendency to blather on and on and on about things when answering a question in class.


That's a great compliment, though. Have you ever heard this song about Data? At least the teacher didn't call you Deanna Troi, which would have meant you were useless.



54together
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14 Aug 2012, 6:22 am

Quote:
I think it's hard for a lot of people on the spectrum to pick up on it, and I think it's one of those small things that people either overlook or are too polite to tell you about.


I know what one sounds like. I've heard a few people read in a monotone voice. But maybe I speak in one, maybe I don't. You could be right. :)



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15 Aug 2012, 4:46 am

Maybe practice phrases using different speaking styles. I am now learning the importance of speaking "correctly" in everyday life. It is so important if you want to "fit in". I don't even "know" that I speak in a monotone, I've been told that I should listen to myself and how I speak! So I know something's wrong but what? I sound fine to myself! And often enough I do speak "correctly" (maybe not though). Sometimes it is too much effort or I forget, often when I am in a state of mind other than happy and content. I am concentrating now on continually being aware of this "monotone" and putting emotion or different rythm into my speech. Slipping even once is detrimental to me because in my workday I speak with everyone in the building daily and many of those are bosses.


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18 Aug 2012, 9:18 pm

I have the monotone voice problem. At some point I learned the "rollercoaster" another poster was talking about, so sometimes I do that, especially in groups. But if someone pulls me away from the computer or asks me something when I am distracted, I find myself speaking monotone.

I tend to think of conversation as data exchange. I have trouble getting away from that and remembering to add the extra conversational things that NTs like.