Girl at work flirts a lot with the guys

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Yes! this is completely normal. You will find this worsens as you age and the attention goes to the younger women. I've noticed that it is the women who are most attractive who first compare themselves to other women the most, and who then have the most problems adapting to the reduction in attention latter.

The answers in this thread have made me feel better about myself. Thank you all.

Why do you even give a crap whether guys other than your boyfriend like her better than you or not?

Because women get told our whole lives that the only way to know if we have any value is if the men around us are paying the right kind of attention to us, and if they're not that means we are worthless. It's hard to ignore that message when it is pushed on you and reinforced constantly throughout your life.

Chiming in; also, whenever one person sucks up all the attention in the room, at work, it's a bad sign. A very, very bad sign. Usually means you can expect that person to be inappropriately competitive in general, and often they turn out to be a bully. In this case, Joe *may* be dealing with the Bambi-eyed kind of bully: cute as a button when they have an audience, mean as a snake when nobody's watching. They exist, oh yes.

Attention hoggery is a major red flag. Joe has picked up a signal worth noting.

I do work alone with her 5 evenings a week and we get on like a house on fire. She is quite easy to talk to. I don't see any signs of intentions of bullying. She's just loud and knows when to speak up, while I'm polite, sensitive and quite shy.
She's into going out every weekend and getting drunk, not just tipsy but very drunk to the point where she doesn't remember how she got home. That is complete opposite to my lifestyle!

I am very sharp on picking up signals and reading body language. I take advantage of this skill because it's unusual for an Aspie to have this ability.

In regards to them ignoring you to flirt with her, you might look at it this way.
1. You have a boyfriend and maybe it's better to keep focusing on your relationship with him while forgetting all those other guys at work.
2. Is it possible she's trying to attract a mate herself? If so then don't take it personally
3.If both parties are flirting at work more than doing the work then it's not very professional or appropriate. It's better that you don't get involved
4. People like that are shallow and probably aren't worthy of your time

I can relate to this a bit, and I think it has a lot to do with being Aspie

I have a couple male friends who are in their late 40s, but are handsome guys. They are super flirtatious with women, and when I am out with them, I get super embarrassed and uncomfortable when they start going into their routine.

Like any guy "on the spectrum" I expect social situations to go a certain way, and I don't like when things go off track or become unpredictable.

So I can see how a very flirtatious and borderline-inappropriate girl could cause you some discomfort

If it is already a problem for you after 2 days, there are chances that it will not get better.

Where is the problem actually? Would you be a bit jealous?

I must be an atypical aspie with this regards. When I am at work, ... I work.

They flirt, they joke, they work or they play, ... I just don't care.

It doesn't bother me so much now. I've been working there almost 6 weeks now, and so I've gotten to know the girl more. I think I was a little 'afraid' of her at first, not in a scared way but in a 'oh my God she's prettier than me, she will get all the attention and she has that way around men that I don't' sort of way. But I've learnt to deal with it.

I'm an atypical Aspie. I do get socially involved with my peers or work colleagues. This is why I hate being called autistic, because it means 'self' and reminds me of 'unsociable', which I am not. But I am on the spectrum. I have other symptoms, like anxiety of sudden loud noise, anxiety of unpredictability, on meds to control outbursts, and have had special interests in the past.

Being flirty and being an attention seeker are quite different.

If she is an attention seeker I'd be weary simply because she could easily turn on you as easy pickings. There's nothing wrong with you being nice just have your boundaries and try not to be a pushover. You're weary of her for a reason in my opinion, pin point why that is and be confident in your opinions about others. Especially when it's bothering you.

Glad you're settling in to your new job.

I have a friend who has outbursts every time there is a sudden loud noise that others often seem to misunderstand. They tell him to "Calm down" when he can't help it. In fact, he was was placed into a job placement but a career counselor where there were sudden things all the time. His career counselor, who works with people like my friend, called it "Bad Behavior." My friend is trying to find a way to cope with these "Outbursts" everytime there is a sudden noise.

You are right. Seven months of knowing her, and now she is beginning to think she can speak to me the way she wants. She's the sort to bark at you and want you to bark back so that an argument can esculate, but I'm not the argumentative sort. And sometimes when caught in an awkward situation with her I suddenly lose all my words. She has anger issues so I'm afraid to get on the wrong side of her, and she knows that.
But she gets really angry if the boss tells her off for having one too many smoke breaks or whatever, so now out of bitterness over the fact that me and the other female worker there get told off less (obviously because we are harder workers and don't take lots of breaks), she has took to snitching if we make a tiny mistake, and turning it around it make it look like the mistakes were made on purpose. Luckily the boss knows I work hard and I hardly make mistakes, but even so, I do not like her behaviour. And they won't fire her, because her mother works in the same company but different department, and she's very fiery and can protest convincingly to get her way, so if the girl did get fired the mother will soon change their minds, which is unfair. Yes, her mother is very fierce.

I don't know how to handle this. I knew she'd start bullying soon. It's only going to get worse. I don't need this. I love my job, I love the place, and I love the other people, but this girl is really spoiling my happiness in my job.

She sounds unpredictable and unpleasant but that is her problem and not yours but it also sounds like learning to be more assertive.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog ... nal-people