Standing around looking like a weirdo

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Too many people upstairs... I can't make it to the door without someone talking to me.

I'll just stay here in the corner and remain perfectly motionless for the next three hours.

I'm glad there are so many here that feel the same way I do about this!

I too think I give off some vibe that says "avoid that guy even though he's perfectly nice"....
I too have a hard time socializing not only with the direct interaction of people I don't know, but also as others have said, the background noises that I'm simply not capable of filtering. My brain wants to devote equal concentration and intensity on each background noise to assess it and analyze it while I'm trying to converse with the person or group. Overload!

Social events in public settings are an all out assault on my senses.

I also always gave off the unapproachable vibe, that's probably why no one approaches me! It can be rough since for ASD its common not to be good at understanding body language and situations. If you truly want to change that about yourself, you would probably have to end up doing research on approachable behavior and consciously force yourself to do it. I gave up on trying to hard in that regard, personally.

A question? Where can a buy one of those lamps?

^Are you saying some people need to wear a lampshade on their head?

Any particular people in mind?

If you're concerned about the ethics of dismantling the host's furniture, the coolie hat may be a suitable alternative.

Agh, this. I've had a lot of mixed results with group conversations. Sometimes I luck out; it's a small enough group that I can keep track of everyone and get a chance to get a few words in, or there are a lot of people there with shared interests that I can talk with them about, or there are a good number of one-on-one opportunities, but most of the time it goes exactly like what you've all described.

I've been trying to work on building up 'scripts' to go through when meeting someone at an event, but it's still very much a work in progress, and I usually end up losing people after a few seconds of extremely awkward forced small talk.

I prefer to apply the term, "the odd person out."

I've long learned to pretty-much avoid those "odd person out" type environments; that is developing that "sixth sense" to be proactive, and avoiding questionable environments.